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Syphilis or Herpes risk? Please help....
I am a straight married guy but got addicted to gay porn and eventually gay hookup site. I avoided meeting anyone but got carried away 3 weeks ago and met one guy.
I made him wear latex condom in the very first minute and gave him blowjob for maybe 10 seconds and then small kisses on his chest and shoulders. No lip kissing happened. We hugged eachother though. His body was completely clean and NO lesion, scar, bumps or any such signs were there. On his penis too he did not had any lesion or sore. I again gave him blowjob for maybe 30 - 40 seconds and he was done. He was wearing the condom throughout (even after ejaculation).
Then I rubbed my penis on his lower back (without condom) for 40-50 seconds maximum and ejaculated on the ground going distant from him.
I am not having any symptoms after 3 weeks. I felt like scratch in inner groin area but that was due to chafing as it was not like Herpes blisters or ulcer. And also that part is impossible to come in contact with any of my partner's part so I believe no chance of bacteria getting in from there and showing symptoms there.
What are the chances of syphilis?
What are the chances of herpes?
Should I go for testing?
I have made mistake and have asked for mercy from my wife. I am facing anxiety and overthinking after reading about STI on Google.
Please help me.
I made him wear latex condom in the very first minute and gave him blowjob for maybe 10 seconds and then small kisses on his chest and shoulders. No lip kissing happened. We hugged eachother though. His body was completely clean and NO lesion, scar, bumps or any such signs were there. On his penis too he did not had any lesion or sore. I again gave him blowjob for maybe 30 - 40 seconds and he was done. He was wearing the condom throughout (even after ejaculation).
Then I rubbed my penis on his lower back (without condom) for 40-50 seconds maximum and ejaculated on the ground going distant from him.
I am not having any symptoms after 3 weeks. I felt like scratch in inner groin area but that was due to chafing as it was not like Herpes blisters or ulcer. And also that part is impossible to come in contact with any of my partner's part so I believe no chance of bacteria getting in from there and showing symptoms there.
What are the chances of syphilis?
What are the chances of herpes?
Should I go for testing?
I have made mistake and have asked for mercy from my wife. I am facing anxiety and overthinking after reading about STI on Google.
Please help me.
COMMUNITY LEADER
There really is no risk here.
Since you've been googling, I'm sure you've seen something about "skin to skin" transmission of STIs. What this actually means is "genital skin to genital skin" and not skin like genital skin to back skin or arm skin to back skin.
It can also mean mouth to genital, and genital to anal, but your concern about your penis rubbing against his back is not a transmission risk.
Syphilis only transmits when symptoms are present.
Herpes can transmit when symptoms aren't present, but you only had a few seconds of contact, and you used a condom. I wouldn't worry about a thing.
I don't see any need for testing, and wouldn't waste any more time worrying about STIs. :)
Since you've been googling, I'm sure you've seen something about "skin to skin" transmission of STIs. What this actually means is "genital skin to genital skin" and not skin like genital skin to back skin or arm skin to back skin.
It can also mean mouth to genital, and genital to anal, but your concern about your penis rubbing against his back is not a transmission risk.
Syphilis only transmits when symptoms are present.
Herpes can transmit when symptoms aren't present, but you only had a few seconds of contact, and you used a condom. I wouldn't worry about a thing.
I don't see any need for testing, and wouldn't waste any more time worrying about STIs. :)
7 Comments
Thank you so much for reply. You are really so helpful to all of us.
Just few clarifications... I did not use condom when I rubbed my penis to his lower back (which was hardly 30 seconds to 40 seconds) and neither when I hugged him.
But yes he was wearing the condom both all the time.
Because I gave him blowjob in which I am sure that I did not took it all deep throat. I did not touch any of his genital skin other than his butts. He was wearing the condom througout and blowjob hardly went for maximum 40 seconds or 50 seconds total.
Do I need to worry about anything?
Just few clarifications... I did not use condom when I rubbed my penis to his lower back (which was hardly 30 seconds to 40 seconds) and neither when I hugged him.
But yes he was wearing the condom both all the time.
Because I gave him blowjob in which I am sure that I did not took it all deep throat. I did not touch any of his genital skin other than his butts. He was wearing the condom througout and blowjob hardly went for maximum 40 seconds or 50 seconds total.
Do I need to worry about anything?
It doesn't matter if you had a condom on when your penis rubbed his back. Nothing is contagious from his lower back. The skin there is too thick to transmit from there - herpes doesn't shed from there, for example, and if he didn't have any sores, he's not contagious from there.
Hugging doesn't transmit STIs. Casual contact like that, even naked, doesn't transmit STIs. That's why I explained the "skin to skin" thing. STIs are only transmitted by oral, vaginal or anal sex, or prolonged, heavy, unclothed rubbing/grinding of the genitals. It most often takes the kind of contact associated with sex.
Re-read what I said. If you had a risk, I'd have told you. Your anxiety is feeding you all the what if scenarios now. Even if you had taken him deep throat, he wore a condom, which prevents transmission of many things and greatly reduces transmission of others, and it was less than a minute.
If you had reason to test, I'd tell you.
Remember that guilt doesn't mean risk.
Hugging doesn't transmit STIs. Casual contact like that, even naked, doesn't transmit STIs. That's why I explained the "skin to skin" thing. STIs are only transmitted by oral, vaginal or anal sex, or prolonged, heavy, unclothed rubbing/grinding of the genitals. It most often takes the kind of contact associated with sex.
Re-read what I said. If you had a risk, I'd have told you. Your anxiety is feeding you all the what if scenarios now. Even if you had taken him deep throat, he wore a condom, which prevents transmission of many things and greatly reduces transmission of others, and it was less than a minute.
If you had reason to test, I'd tell you.
Remember that guilt doesn't mean risk.
Thank you very much. I feel so relieved now.
You are an amazing person with excellent knowledge. Thank you very much for helping and guiding.
You are an amazing person with excellent knowledge. Thank you very much for helping and guiding.
Thank you for the kind words. You're quite welcome. :)
Hi Jessi,
It has been almost more then 5 weeks to my exposure. Do I need to worry about oral syphilis or Herpes or any other STI? I have no symptoms at all.
It has been almost more then 5 weeks to my exposure. Do I need to worry about oral syphilis or Herpes or any other STI? I have no symptoms at all.
as AJ said there was no risk, so regardless of elapsed time, the advice remains the same - no chance of an STI.
Hi AJ & Gazsmithster,
Sorry to bother you again.
I had talked to the stranger hook-up partner and he said that he is completely clean and has never done any gay Anal or gay blowjob earlier with anyone and is completely free from any disease, sores, lesion etc. Considering he is saying truth, can I consider that now I am at low risk or zero risk?
I am not so good with knowledge about STIs like you both and thus went to Dr. Google which gave me health anxiety. But wanted to understand that do my act have any risk of Chlyamadia, Gonorhea or syphilis?
Google says that this STI are asymptomatic but what u read here on medhelp Dr. HHH and others say that clinically it is not like that. Generally unprotected intercourse are always reason behind transmission and very short time protected oral or just rubbing penis to lower back for few seconds is not enough for transmission. Even doctors don't recommend any testing for one time incident. Is that true?
As I said that I didn't see any lesions on his buttocks or penis (which was covered with latex condom throughout) and did not come in contact with any fluid from his body, but i did not strach and see anything in his ass crack as I was not interested in it. If we consider worst scenario that he had anything there but did not got in contact with any of my body part than is there any risk?
Sorry again for bothering you but you have been very helpful in making all of us understand the science behind transmission very efficiently and it helps us to stay calm.
Sorry to bother you again.
I had talked to the stranger hook-up partner and he said that he is completely clean and has never done any gay Anal or gay blowjob earlier with anyone and is completely free from any disease, sores, lesion etc. Considering he is saying truth, can I consider that now I am at low risk or zero risk?
I am not so good with knowledge about STIs like you both and thus went to Dr. Google which gave me health anxiety. But wanted to understand that do my act have any risk of Chlyamadia, Gonorhea or syphilis?
Google says that this STI are asymptomatic but what u read here on medhelp Dr. HHH and others say that clinically it is not like that. Generally unprotected intercourse are always reason behind transmission and very short time protected oral or just rubbing penis to lower back for few seconds is not enough for transmission. Even doctors don't recommend any testing for one time incident. Is that true?
As I said that I didn't see any lesions on his buttocks or penis (which was covered with latex condom throughout) and did not come in contact with any fluid from his body, but i did not strach and see anything in his ass crack as I was not interested in it. If we consider worst scenario that he had anything there but did not got in contact with any of my body part than is there any risk?
Sorry again for bothering you but you have been very helpful in making all of us understand the science behind transmission very efficiently and it helps us to stay calm.
Your question was fully answered by our members.
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You are reading content posted in the STDs / STIs Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
