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To everyone that is scared (READ THIS)
It's quite normal to be scared of STDs! Each and everyone of us has been confronted with that kind of situation during some time in their life. And I'm happy to tell you that I've put an end to it TODAY.
For the past two years I've been living with the fear that I have contracted a STD. For the past two years I had problems continuing my life. For the past two years I've done nothing else, except feeling sorry for myself! So I did like everyone on this forum does, I browsed all the web-sites about STDs, I read their archives, their forums for two years. For two years I was checking my penis for symptoms every minute, from every hour, from everyday! For two years I was afraid to commit to my girlfriend! For the past two I haven't lived a single day...
Couple of days ago, I said this must stop! It's obvious that I made a mistake, but I won't pay for that mistake the rest of my life. So I took the testing, first I tested NEGATIVE for HIV. Then NEGATIVE for Gonorrhea and Syphilis. Unfortunately POSITIVE for Chlamydia and Ureoplasma Urealityca. And it isn't bad as it seems, you just have to drink some pills and that's it... But this wasn't the end. I knew there are other STDs like Hepatitis B, C and HSV from which I was terrified because they are just too damn often (It's like every other person is infected)! So I decided to take the tests, because I knew that my life is never going to be the same if I don't...
And everything was negative as well! So my "symptoms" (which were never there disappeared).
However, the point of all this isn't about me being healthy, but about me being a coward and too afraid to stand up for myself. You know last night, before hearing the results I was thinking about my life, these two years, the people in my life... and I realized that it's all the same to them if I have a STD or not, they will still love me and stay with me. Furthermore, it will have no big impact to my life, it's not like I haven't been given many good moments and it's not like won't be given many more not depending on my health status. But I was quite sure that one thing would change for sure, that I will return to being myself again. I know now that the fear of a STDs is lot worse than STDs itself.
So I'm telling you as a friend, as a person who has been through all this and luckily got alive, IT'S NOT WORTH IT! For once in your lives don't be cowards and do what you have to do. Don't hide behind this forums, don't calculate the risks, don't cry beneath your sheets, don't feel sorry for yourself. In the end so what if you have an STD (even if it's incurable). I know that I would die for the girl that I love, so I would sure love her the same even if she has an STD. Even if you are HIV positive, you are given a chance to enjoy life once more and that is whats all about. It isn't about how long you live, it's about how you live your life. So please don't waste years of your life like I did, there are moments which I can't bring back and which I will regret for as long as I live. Hope you all get better in the future!
For the past two years I've been living with the fear that I have contracted a STD. For the past two years I had problems continuing my life. For the past two years I've done nothing else, except feeling sorry for myself! So I did like everyone on this forum does, I browsed all the web-sites about STDs, I read their archives, their forums for two years. For two years I was checking my penis for symptoms every minute, from every hour, from everyday! For two years I was afraid to commit to my girlfriend! For the past two I haven't lived a single day...
Couple of days ago, I said this must stop! It's obvious that I made a mistake, but I won't pay for that mistake the rest of my life. So I took the testing, first I tested NEGATIVE for HIV. Then NEGATIVE for Gonorrhea and Syphilis. Unfortunately POSITIVE for Chlamydia and Ureoplasma Urealityca. And it isn't bad as it seems, you just have to drink some pills and that's it... But this wasn't the end. I knew there are other STDs like Hepatitis B, C and HSV from which I was terrified because they are just too damn often (It's like every other person is infected)! So I decided to take the tests, because I knew that my life is never going to be the same if I don't...
And everything was negative as well! So my "symptoms" (which were never there disappeared).
However, the point of all this isn't about me being healthy, but about me being a coward and too afraid to stand up for myself. You know last night, before hearing the results I was thinking about my life, these two years, the people in my life... and I realized that it's all the same to them if I have a STD or not, they will still love me and stay with me. Furthermore, it will have no big impact to my life, it's not like I haven't been given many good moments and it's not like won't be given many more not depending on my health status. But I was quite sure that one thing would change for sure, that I will return to being myself again. I know now that the fear of a STDs is lot worse than STDs itself.
So I'm telling you as a friend, as a person who has been through all this and luckily got alive, IT'S NOT WORTH IT! For once in your lives don't be cowards and do what you have to do. Don't hide behind this forums, don't calculate the risks, don't cry beneath your sheets, don't feel sorry for yourself. In the end so what if you have an STD (even if it's incurable). I know that I would die for the girl that I love, so I would sure love her the same even if she has an STD. Even if you are HIV positive, you are given a chance to enjoy life once more and that is whats all about. It isn't about how long you live, it's about how you live your life. So please don't waste years of your life like I did, there are moments which I can't bring back and which I will regret for as long as I live. Hope you all get better in the future!
Nongonnococal Urethitis is a *****. Seems more often then not fluroquinonones are needed due to Macrolide resistance emerging due to people not abstaining from sex while on also not taking antibiotics long enough this is in part a failure on the prescribers part from doing due diligence.
It took you two years to go get tested? No offense, but I'm not familiar with that kind of fear.
The longest I would continue to feel afraid is the longest I would need to wait to be 99% sure a negative on an STD detection test was accurate.
The longest I would continue to feel afraid is the longest I would need to wait to be 99% sure a negative on an STD detection test was accurate.
How are you doing now, I jsut read your post but I see this was years ago! My life had been mental and emotional turmoil since I was sexually assulted last year and my body has not felt right since. What do you do when you have symptoms but no tests can confirm what’s going on ? And all my doctors think it’s in my head! I’ve even through it’s possible it’s just the anxiety but the symptoms -discharge itching and burning are bad. Even 8 months on. I was tested high risk hpv. The only other person I been with in six years besides the assult-my partner- is so supportive and loved me stilll even knowing I was paranoid about potential of getting warts and he still with me. But that gives me anxiety too as I feel I’m now diseasing him:( the man I love and it’s not fair. New growths have now popped up inside my vagina and went to sexual health clinic again right away-they assures they are vagina papules.. but why? Stress? What are these things. I’m seeing a derm in a month anyway to get a proper diagnosis and to see if they are warts or not. I guess the answer is learning to live with whatever we have. As you said.. and living..not worrying. Since assult my life literally is not even my life, it’s gone. I want to get it back it’s horrivle
3 Comments
Another lurker in the forum thread passing by. Firstly, Im sorry to hear what you had/have to go through. Im a guy so I wouldnt really be able to clearly understand your mental and physical conditions.
But I do know power of uncertainty and pessimism can lead one to depression and distress, which could lead further into more dangerous, creative thinking. For instance, I was depressed and felt sorry for myself for sleeping with a prostitute, believing into the fact that I may have caught something bad. So everyday for nearly 2 months I thought about flying to America, buy a gun and blow myself up. I believed I didnt deserve to live because I contradicted my own belief that I will never do such act, yet I did. Fortunately I have two very close friends, where one knew I had serious depression, while the other knew my whole situation. Both were supportive in their own ways and I learned to be more optimistic and move on over the next few months.
The man you love, he may be waiting for you to make a step forward, or he may be thinking you are going to be over with it. Im not sure how things are between you two. But one thing I can say clearly from the details you gave. The man you love loves you for who you are & were. Despite the fact that he knows your current situation, he wants to move on HIS life WITH you. So, why dont you? (you are seeking answers in the internet, when he is already giving you the answer)
'Past' maybe heavy and painful, but 'future' can be bright and fun. Get out of your place (with or without your love) to see the sunset to look back at your progress and the sunrise next day to start a new bright day.
But then, if you are worried about 'diseasing' him, I believe its best you learn more about the stds you caught (or think you caught) and understand how to take preventive measures.
Like welleducated said, lets not be cowards and move on, because life is about enjoying your life and how you live it.
(In regards to life, sometimes we need to be more liberal than conservative) - this is just me...
Commented by a coward, who is trying to move on by doing things he used to enjoy (Work out/hang out with friends) and try new things out.
But I do know power of uncertainty and pessimism can lead one to depression and distress, which could lead further into more dangerous, creative thinking. For instance, I was depressed and felt sorry for myself for sleeping with a prostitute, believing into the fact that I may have caught something bad. So everyday for nearly 2 months I thought about flying to America, buy a gun and blow myself up. I believed I didnt deserve to live because I contradicted my own belief that I will never do such act, yet I did. Fortunately I have two very close friends, where one knew I had serious depression, while the other knew my whole situation. Both were supportive in their own ways and I learned to be more optimistic and move on over the next few months.
The man you love, he may be waiting for you to make a step forward, or he may be thinking you are going to be over with it. Im not sure how things are between you two. But one thing I can say clearly from the details you gave. The man you love loves you for who you are & were. Despite the fact that he knows your current situation, he wants to move on HIS life WITH you. So, why dont you? (you are seeking answers in the internet, when he is already giving you the answer)
'Past' maybe heavy and painful, but 'future' can be bright and fun. Get out of your place (with or without your love) to see the sunset to look back at your progress and the sunrise next day to start a new bright day.
But then, if you are worried about 'diseasing' him, I believe its best you learn more about the stds you caught (or think you caught) and understand how to take preventive measures.
Like welleducated said, lets not be cowards and move on, because life is about enjoying your life and how you live it.
(In regards to life, sometimes we need to be more liberal than conservative) - this is just me...
Commented by a coward, who is trying to move on by doing things he used to enjoy (Work out/hang out with friends) and try new things out.
Thank for commenting and I totally get what you’re saying. I guess because when I got checked for months and doctors said it was nothing we then had unprotected sex again but not knowing I had anything. Assuming it was in my head like doctors suggested. So I feel guilty that if I have warts now he was that virus already too. The high risk hpv he has aswell. I know he is being so optimistic and even if it is warts it’s not a big deal. I want to move on my life with him too I just need to be able to deal with my anxiety’s and live life
Hey, One month passed already since my last comment. Hope you are doing fine and moving on.But if you havent already done so, would like to cheer you up to do so.
Hope time cures your anxiety like it partially did for me. But i bet ill still be paranoid when i think about it now and then.
I had a chat yesterday with my friends from work about stds and they were pretty much not concerned about the ones that were pretty common. And one friend had hsv since birth but moves on. I guess to some it aint big of a deal.
I dunno what would drive u forward but i wish u could add up to ur bfs optimism and have a happy life. If u are going to be negative about it, its gonna be a zero sum game. Hey wheres all the fun? Im not a fan of the yolo concept but lets treasure our lives and ppl we care :)
Hope time cures your anxiety like it partially did for me. But i bet ill still be paranoid when i think about it now and then.
I had a chat yesterday with my friends from work about stds and they were pretty much not concerned about the ones that were pretty common. And one friend had hsv since birth but moves on. I guess to some it aint big of a deal.
I dunno what would drive u forward but i wish u could add up to ur bfs optimism and have a happy life. If u are going to be negative about it, its gonna be a zero sum game. Hey wheres all the fun? Im not a fan of the yolo concept but lets treasure our lives and ppl we care :)
This has been making me feel so much better every time I read it . For the past 5 months I’ve been feeling like you once did , i have anxiety attacks every time i think about having an std , i don’t even go out anymore because im always depressed & I’m scared to go to the doctor and find out I have an std because my mom would kill me ....but every time I read this paragraph it helps me so much
A fast question I am scared my girlfriend will leave mee because i may have an std what do I do?
2 Comments
That was so well said I hope my new partner will understand. The way you did’ I’m sick to my stomach I just tested positive to chlamydia
I think you should tell her, and let her know how much you love her and this happened before you both got together
Well that's up to you. Sometimes you can get used to fear and it will become a part of you personality. Hope you are strong enough and continue your life as if nothing has happened. That way I am sure you would be happier and you could once again start enjoying the beautiful gift called life. After taking all the tests it's all up to you to decide whether you are worthy of it. As you know doctors could only tell you whether you are healthy or not, however they cannot force you to believe that you are OK. Further more, even if it does seem "hard" to believe, they are right if they tell you that you are OK!!! So stop tormenting your heart and your soul and just ENJOY LIFE!!!
Your statement inspires me a lot. I was also in the situation that I feared and had no courage to take a test. Finally I decided to take tests and I didn't have severe desease.Anyway sometimes I still can't convince myself completely that I am 100% safe.Sometimes the fear hurts me. I think I probably need to take a test again and again until it completely eases my mind although I have to face the fear again..
I hope I could overcome my own fear too.
I hope I could overcome my own fear too.
Hello,
After reading your post I feel much better. I have posted to this forum before about herpes. I went to the doctoc and the test came back pos for one and two. I still don't shows any signs and I had been wanting to go back and get another test, but never did it. I was feeling so down when the test came back and the doctor they just want to give you some pill and say take these. I still have not told anyone because everytime they see the people on tv talking about herpes, they seem to think the people are carzy and they also say things like I would not be on tv telling people i have herpes. After reading your post i am going to a different doctor for a test. Thanks for making me feel better.
After reading your post I feel much better. I have posted to this forum before about herpes. I went to the doctoc and the test came back pos for one and two. I still don't shows any signs and I had been wanting to go back and get another test, but never did it. I was feeling so down when the test came back and the doctor they just want to give you some pill and say take these. I still have not told anyone because everytime they see the people on tv talking about herpes, they seem to think the people are carzy and they also say things like I would not be on tv telling people i have herpes. After reading your post i am going to a different doctor for a test. Thanks for making me feel better.
You are right!!! Living with Herpes isn't scary or difficult... There are thousands of people who aren't aware that they are infected. There are also millions of people that are aware that they are infected and have live lives. 50% or 60% of the people in USA are infected with HSV 1(my girlfriend has it too). So you would be a fool if you think that something terrible has happened to you. Every now and then we face some challenges in our life, you should be lucky that you have came against an easier one... It will be a shame if you don't overcome it!
I just wanted to say thank you for posting this, it has made me feel so much better. I just found out today I tested positive for herpes (not sure which type yet) but I have been in a funk since I last spoke to my doctor. I know this is incurable but I also know it could have been a lot worse. I know some people have it worse than me and I pray for them. I know I can continue to live my life and do the things that I have been doing but some how I think it will still affect me some mentally. I just pray that I can continue to live my life and not let this overpower and consume me into the thought of not living happily.
Your post couldn't be more correct, welleducated! I too have been misarable wondering and examining everything different with my body deathly afraid it was an STD. It was draining both mentally and physically as well. LAst Thursday, at 2 am, I decided that was it and ordered a test online. I went in the next day and gave my samples. I was a nervous wreak for all of Friday and Saturday, only calming down a little bit after reading this site. The people here are knowledegable and well thought-out. Not to say people don't do stupid and risky things, but the majority of people are much safer than they imagine. Anyhow, this morning I called to get my results...negative for everything tested. Really, the most important thing to do is to act safe, and get *tested* when you're unsure. That's the only way you can be 100% sure you're not infected. Good luck and God bless everyone....
Truer words never spoken man. I've been in hell for 6 months after a mistake made while on an all inclusive resort. Biggest worry is herpes right now, had a bit of worry with HIV even though I know it isn't true it's been hard to let go. I'm in a part of Canada where there is no blood testing so I have to go by a negative culture and reassurance from multiple visual inspections but I'm still not convinved.
I guess the point is, even if I do have Herpes it could be a hell of alot worse and I can still do all the things I love.
I guess the point is, even if I do have Herpes it could be a hell of alot worse and I can still do all the things I love.
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You are reading content posted in the STDs / STIs Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
