Unprotected Vaginal Sex

[Myeyehurts]

Hello.

Looking to find some comfort. I am a male and had an unprotected vaginal sex encounter with a female I’ve known for a while about two weeks ago to the day. She started performing oral on me and then we had sex.

She assured me that she is clean and even said she got tested after her and I had met up and that her tests were clean. She said she would show me the results to ease my mind but she only showed me the results for syphilis, HIV and another one that I can’t remember.  Said they only gave her that printout and that the nurse or whomever verbally told her that all of her tests were clean. She said she scheduled an appointment to get tested at a clinic in a big city near us and got same day results. I don’t have any reason to not believe her.

My worry is coming from the fact that my urethra feels like it’s “irritated” and the tip seems more sensitive. Not red or swollen, no pain when urinating and zero discharge. But I do feel the “need” to urinate more frequently and my perineum area feels “tired or tight”. Could this just be an anxiety thing?  It’s fair to mention that I am married and this event happened as a result of too much alcohol in the middle of the night and I’m obviously deeply shameful and regretful. I’m trying to find out a way to go get tested and clear my conscience hopefully. I really appreciate any insight you may be able to provide.

[auntiejessi]

If you have symptoms, you need to get tested, obviously.

It's hard to comment on her test results without knowing what they were for, and without knowing everything she was tested for.

If you're in the US, google your county and health department. Most of them have STI clinics. For example, if you live in Chicago, google Cook County Health Department or Cook County STI testing or STI clinic.

If you're in a bigger city, you can even google the city name and STI clinic.

You can also try Planned Parenthood. They test men, too. You can self-pay at all of them.

All that said, make sure you are drinking plenty of water, avoid caffeine and alcohol, as both of those are very irritating to the bladder and urethra.

[Myeyehurts]

I appreciate the response. Admittedly, I did drink heavily over the last week or so especially because of this and my anxiety over all of it. I did have gonnorhea about 10 years ago that doxy and ceftriaxone took care of. The symptoms then showed up within a week of the encounter and were debilitating. Nothing I have right now is close to that, and arguably, I could say I have no “real” symptoms consistent with an STD in my penile region compared to the last time.

Would gonnorhea show the same symptoms every time or coukd they be less severe this time?  

I appreciate your help and I’m still working to get tested ASAP for peace of mind.

[Myeyehurts]

Hey Jessi,  it showed that you commented starting with “going to try and combine everything” but I can’t see the whole Response. Anyway you can repost it so I can read it. Thanks.

[Myeyehurts]

Also, about 10 days after the encounter, I felt fine and had unprotected sex with my wife as well as gave her unprotected vaginal oral sex. Within a week, my throat was really sore and had red/white spots in the back of it. No fever, no swollen lymph nodes, and no real flu-like symptoms, although I did feel a little “sick”. I’m hoping it’s just a viral, unrelated issue. I do have multiple smaller kids that are always fighting some kind of sickness.

The sore throat is starting to dissipate. Still no discharge out of my penis and no swollen urethra and no swollen nodes in my pelvic region. What are the chances I have could have given her something through the unprotected vaginal
Sex and then infected my throat when I gave her oral?

Any answers would be greatly appreciated as I’m freaking out. Thank you!

[auntiejessi]

Okay, going to try and combine everything into one response.

Did you give her oral - the friend, not your wife?

If you didn't, chances are that this is something else and not an actual STI. Since your throat was so sore, it would seem like maybe you got something else - maybe covid, the flu, another common respiratory thing - and it's running its course.

Something not well known is that common viruses and illnesses can cause urethritis. Things that cause upper respiratory viruses, strep, etc. can be transmitted to the urethra via oral sex, and cause infections there.

So yes, it's possible if you have an upper respiratory infection or strep or something, you could have given that to your wife.

I do think you should see a doctor. Test for STIs and let someone check your throat. If you have strep, your wife could get that genitally.

Definitely cut back on the drinking. It's not a coping skill, it's not good for your body, and might be contributing to some of your symptoms.

[Myeyehurts]

After I posted my comment stating that I couldnt see your response, it reloaded or whatever and now I can see it. I did not give the friend oral sex.

I really appreciate it. I believe this is all anxiety which is an entirely other issue. I will still seek to see a doctor and get this all cleared up. Thank you so much!

[auntiejessi]

You're welcome.

I did mean to address that gonorrhea symptoms would probably be similar, if not the same, if you get it again.

Some people don't get symptoms, but if you do, they should be similar. Even if they aren't quite as bad, you should have similar symptoms.

Good luck, and let me know how you're doing. :)

[Myeyehurts]

Hey, Jessi. Just wanted to follow up with you. My friend just sent me the emailed results of all of her tests from last month, a few days after our encounter. Everything was negative.

I think this will give me a good peace of mind. If I have any symptoms for some reason pop up, I’ll address them then. Thank you so much for all that you do on here. It doesn’t go unnoticed.

[auntiejessi]

Happy to hear it, and you're welcome. Take care. :)