Teen Mental Health Issues Community
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Avatar universal

Teen with depression, parent refuses to help

Hi. I'm 16 years old and I am certain that I am suffering from depression. I have been having suicidal thoughts for several months and have just tried coping with my depression, but to no avail. I have told my parents, but they refuse to take me to see a doctor to see about taking antidepressants or seeing a therapist. They don't believe that it is as serious as it is for me. They are Christians, but I am not, and they think the only way I will get better is through Christianity. I know I need to get help, but I have no idea what to do.
5 Responses
Avatar universal
hey my new friend, I'm sorry you're having such problems so young.  Believe me, I'm talking from decades of experience..I too started having terrible depression when I was 15 or 16 the first time.  Like you, no one helped out, I only had 1 parent an she worked all the time, so I never told.  It got bad fast.  I attempted suicide, really, a cry for help cause I was so sad.  Put in a hospital, which didn't help, but I was started on antidepressants to help,  I tell u this, cause I know what ur going thru.  If your parents won't take you serious, please reach out to teachers, call a suicide hotline,  tell anyone u know an trust how ur feeling,,be honest, tell them how ur really feeling.  Hon, it will pass eventually with help an maybe meds an therapy.  You're not alone, most if not all have depression at least once in their life.  You're in a tough age right now, peer pressure, just growing up is hard enough, so don't think you're alone.  Please, please reach out an take care of this.  Take these suggestions..u don't want to die, it's FINALS an can't be undone,, an it will pass,  I promise you.  I got thru it, hard but doable.  Please let me know how it goes....take care.   A person that cares for you.  Mary
6726276 tn?1421126668
I'd also like to add, maybe the pastor can council you if that's the only place your parents take you. Remember there are lots of people going thru these feelings. You are not alone. Maxy
4851940 tn?1515694593
Hello meery,

Please take on board what the other posters have written.

I am glad that you have turned to your parents for help, but sad that they do not understand about depression.  I've been there exactly how you are now and know exactly what you are going through.

My mother too didn't believe in depression.  

The thing with depression at your age is that there may be a physical underlying issue - especially if you are anaemic.  It may be that through depression you are not eating properly, that then in time drops the iron levels in your body which will make you feel very tired, can make you feel rock bottom to the point of contemplating suicide.

Are you not able to see your doctor without your parents?  I do not know how it works in your country, but in the UK a 16 year old can see the doctor without a parent.

I would suggest that you write all your feelings in a secret diary and the things that are bothering you.  Sometimes there is an underlying problem that can lead to depression, sometimes there is no underlying cause.

You do not say whether you are male or female.  Girls can feel very emotional about 10 days before a period is due and this is hormonal and quite normal.  Writing a diary will help you to determine if your moods are related to that.  Eating a healthy and well balanced diet and cutting out or cutting down on junk foods and fizzy drinks will help as will having Evening Primrose Oil.

If your depression has been triggered off by problems at school like bullying, school work etc., these things need to be tackled and sorted - with the help of your teachers if necessary.  There should be a school nurse at school, so ask if you can have an appointment with her/him to discuss how you feel.

Although antidepressants can help, there are also other ways to help with you being so low.  Good friends (avoid people who make you feel worse or put your down); going for a walk in the fresh air; doing something that you enjoy and also relaxation whatever you like (listening to music, dancing, your favourite sport).  I know that when you are feeling down that you won't feel like doing any of your favourite things, but try and go out for a short walk in the fresh air even if it is just for 5 minutes.

The right type of counselling can help - make enquiries if there is any at school if you are not able to see your doctor.  Cognitive Behavioural Therapy counselling is the one that is likely to help you.  If you get a negative thought, try and think of a positive one (just like flipping a coin).  It will be hard at first.  Rather than tell your parents that you feel depressed and would like to see a doctor, say that you feel ill and would like a doctor to check you out.  Feeling unwell for a long time can make us feel depressed which then makes us feel even worse.  A bit of a vicious circle.

If you do have a faith, pray to help you to get through this rough time, but also try and get help from other sources too like mentioned above.

If there is anything at all that is bothering you, don't forget that you can post on this website and there are lots of people that will give you help and support.

Keeping posting here too, we are here to help.

Best wishes.
Avatar universal
Please please. I'm a mom of 2. My son is now 17 and we've been battling his depression since middle school. Your parents obviously have never experienced "depression". I believe to honestly understand depression one has to have experienced it.  Are you still able to get up and go to school? If so, first thing you do when you go back is go straight to your school nurse. Let her know everything. Please.
It breaks my heart your parents refuse to get you help. Please take care
Avatar universal
Please don't stop trying to get help.  Talk with a school counselor or nurse or maybe a friend's mom that you trust.  This is so important and there is help for you somewhere.  Take care!
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