1st of all, My heart goes out to you for your loss.
My friends thinks that my thyroid problem (cancer) is stress related. My son was injured in Iraq in June of 08. My stress level was very very high due to his injuries as well as me going through a divorce at the same time. Sept/08 A knot appeared on my neck and all my problems started. I do think that extream stress played a role some how.
I was on Effexor for over 8 years at a very high dose ( 375mg per day). Although I keep getting told the thyroid cancer I had was unrelated to the taking of the anti-depressants, I do wonder.
I have read some articles on the internet about it, but it seems nothing is conclusive.
I already had symptoms of hypo before I took the anti-depressant, so I think it could just be coincidental.
Cheers