I want to live!

[Jennifer1987]

Oh God! I have never posted here so much in my life... I am just at my wits end.... I cant take this c.r.a.p anymore. I am so depressed today! Crying a lot, taking my moods out on my boyfriend and just over all wish I was dead at times (dont worry not sucidial) Just keep saying to God to put me out of my misery...

I took my bad ood out on my b/f today and he totally did not deserve it! I feel so bad about that now aswel! I am so frecking annoyed that Im going through and that its so unfair. Jez like theres murderers and abusers out there living the life of luxary and then theres people who try to lead good law abiding lives like us and WE suffer...... Im sick of it! I feel like screaming!
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jennifer1987]

Il get an app. in about a week. To he// with them all, I cant do this **** anymore... None of them give to $hits about me.. Quick fix with anti depressants..

As for my mom, she can di and say what she likes cause I wont be listening!

[dani2776]

Stay positive.  Your doctor is not very knowledgeable about the thyroid but is at least referring you to an endo.  Lets hope that will give you some answers.  It's hard not to constantly worry about your health when things are not going well.  From the time my eyes open in the morning to the time I fall asleep, that is all that is on my mind.  As far as your mom, try and not to be too hard on her.  She has no idea what is going on with you or how you are feeling.  She can only see what is on the outside and of course to everyone we look fine!  When is your appointment with the endo?

[Jennifer1987]

Well appointment today was a WASTE of time! He barely listened.

I asked him for an increase, told him about the new ranges andthat I wanted my TSH down to 1....

His reply: My thyroid is working perfectly at the levels its at, that getting my tsh down to 1 is very dangerious and he has never heard of it being done.

So he said I have some sort of depression and that I should go on meds. I refused and got really angry with him and my mom as she didn't even back me up! He won't up my meds but he is referring me to an endo..

He as good as said I was a hypocondriact. he said I worry about my health too much! When i left I gave my mom an ear full and said thanks a mill for backing me up..

I now actually feel like I could Kill meself!

[dani2776]

Did the symptoms of anxiety and frightening mood swings alleviate after your thyroid was removed?  It seems Jennifer1987 and I are having the issues with the anxiety.  The physical symptoms are bad but the mental part is WORSE!!!!! My poor kids never know when I am going to blow and it is scary!

[Jennifer1987]

Gimel: Thank you for that last post, I think Im begining to understand this a lot more now! I cant wait to fo into my doc. tomorrow and tell all. lol thamks so much!

Hopeforthegoodstuff: I was diagnosed with just hypo last September and I asked my old dc why.. he said just because.. No eplaination to why.
In my opinion there is ALWAYS a reason/cause of hypothyroidism, it just takes a good doc to find out! I was told I had HAshimoto's about 3 weeks ago, so I was relived to know WHY, but disappointed because Im stuck with this for ever!

On a happier not, I went out last night and had a brill night!!!! Glad I can still do that!

[hope4thegoodstuff]

I find it interesting to read so many posts where people say they have actual pain in their throat.  I never had pain...I never had trouble swallowing, but when the surgeon took my thyroid he said was was extremley enlarged and very hard in texture due to the hashi's..I do not know how long I had been dealing with it with that without medication.  I was not diagnosed with it to start with.  My dr just thought I was Hypo.  and there was cancer, so it had to go.  My symptoms seemed to be more heart palps, anxiety and swift and frightening mood swings...(that from my husband)  I really had no clue that I had a thyroid issue.  I thought the drs were nuts and I was going to die from mysterious unknown disease.. LOL.