Loosing my mind here.. HELP!

[lobo29]

I just finished reading all the incest posts.. my problem is.. I recently moved in with a great woman, she is 33.  She asked me to move in 2 months ago and I happily accepted.  I noticed quickly that her 14 year old used to parade around only in his VERY short boxers, very easily seeing his privates bouncing as he walks. She too would parade around in a very short PJ nightie that when she bent over you can see everything. I have finally requested for him to always be dressed when I am home and for her to wear something more appropriate when he is home and they both have complied.  He looks 16 or 17 but has just turned 14.  When I first started coming over a year ago, I quickly noticed the intimate hugs and kisses on the lips, the saw him actually lower his hands to her waist then rear end.. but when he saw me he quickly took his hands off her. recently one night her and I were just laying in bed watching TV. Both of us under the covers, her son comes in and practicaly dry humps her while he is wearing just his PJ bottoms. Kissing her on the lips and neck saying "I love you mommy".  after about 30 seconds of this he gets off her and she says "I love you too". and he leaves. I voiced my uncomfortableness with this and it never happened again. Also I voiced my concern with  the hugs and intimate kisses all the time, and she SAID she would talk to him and this  doesnt happen anymore when I am there that is. Just a quick kiss on the lips.. like a pucker kiss and hug and she pushes him off.   BUT I can see he still wants to do more but she pushes him away, BUT I am sure that more goes on when I am not there, as I work a full time job.  I once walked in on them in her bedroom BOTH laying on the bed. He was in his PJ bottoms, I think on top of the covers and she was under the covers sitting up.  The thing is when I walked he quickly jumped out of the bed and first layed on the oppoisite side of the bed on the floor face down as if to hide. I told him I see you and then he just kneeled on the floor hiding his lower half REFUSING to get up .. now why does a man or boy refuse to stand up right away??? Obviously hiding his hard on. I looked at her face and she is extremely red and embarrassed smiling. During this time SHE tells to go get her more ice water and hands me her cup of already filled ice water. I say you dont need anymore you have a full cup. Obviously she was trying to get rid of me. Finally after a few minutes he is able to stand and he leaves the room. NOTHING was said to me from her as Iay there stunned. After that we just went to sleep. It was never brought up again, I know MY FAULT!   She constantly goes into his room at least 3-5 times a night sometimes just for a minute or 2 or sometimes for about 5 minutes. I ask why she went in there and it was to say goodnight or tell him to shower or put his clothes away or some other excuse.  Sometime before we go to bed and sometimes after we are already in bed she does this. His room is right accross from hers/ours and she will shut his door every time and will shut her door sometimes. Just recently I asked her to leave the doors open and so far she has and she has cut down the number of times she goes in there. I have started telling him "we are going to sleep now and locking our door, go tell your mom goodnight so she doesnt have to get up later". So far this has worked out.  There is no discipline from her for anything that he does not do!  She started a chores list that he never does, she tells him  to shower and he never does when she wants him to, its always hours later if he does at all, he never helps with anything unless he wants something in return. When he is sitting on the bed and she goes in there to say goodnight he nestles his head into her large breasts after kissing her and says "I love you mommy" with a smile on his face!   There is no talking to her without her defending herself with him, or defending him all the time and then I always get the silent treatment for 2 or 3 days.  She knows I am uncomfortable about their closeness but continues to kiss on lips and wear next to nothing when they say goodnight so he gets a good feel of her body when they hug.  I was not brought up this way and its getting more difficult each week that passes. I love her very much but its killing me inside. I know they are MUCH closer when I am not there, Of course she says he NEVER comes in to her room when I am working but he tells me that he goes in to say goodnight still, and who knows what else.   Her eyes cant lie... they say so much when she looks at me and tells me things. They use to go into the bathroom when each other was showering. She says we only have 1 bathroom so when someone has to pee we dont lock the door. BUT everytime she showers he all of a sudden he MUST go pee??  Or I have have caught him going into her room just as she is getting out of the shower so he catches her naked getting dressed.. when I saw him closing her door after her shower  I walked in and she was still naked and said.. OH I thought I had the door locked!  Of course when I am in there and he didnt know I was, while she was getting undressed a few times she would slam the door on him and yell to knock first.. but NOT when I wasnt in the room!  All just a show for me. I went through their texts on their phones a few times when they left them out or were sleeping.. its all lovey stuff.. and she calls him "daddykins" sometimes. And she sends him sexual type funy pics like our supermarket sells weird foods, one of which is "spotted ****". She took a pic of this and sent it to him. His reply was "YUMMY"!!  WTF??  I do not have a probelm with a mother being close to her son .. but once puberty is reached its time for privacy on both ends. He should respect her and she should respect him and his privacy.. I feel that this will be going on for several years to come.. I am terrified about that. I can't deal with it that long. One day everything will come out of my thoughts and out of my mouth and either she will throw me out or understand what I am feeling and HOPEFULLY let me help her teach him some responsibility, respect and discipline. I feel VERY sorry for this young man.. when he gets older he will have NO sense of responsibility and will never treat ANY woman with respect.. because he is not being raised that way.  If I accuse her of this and its NOT happening I will feel like afool and she will obviously kick me out.. but I am sure she wouldnt admit it to me anyway, right??  Half of me wants to catch them in the act and the other  half keeps saying LET IT GO..  I have come home from work at irregular times on a couple of occassions and nothing was going on, she would be in her room or elsewhere in the house and he would be playing his games in his room. But to me that just meant they finished or just hadnt started anything or just werent in the mood that day. AM I CRAZY??  Can a perfectly normal woman who has a responsible job be having sex with her son??  I need a nanny cam but they are too expensive!!  ANY comments would be helpful!!  

[AnnieBrooke]

She's going to notice a nanny cam, anyway.  They have clocks with a camera link, and they're rather small, but if the two of them have something to hide, they aren't going to be fooled by the sudden appearance of a new clock, either.

Maybe the boy has something on his mind and the mom doesn't, or maybe they both have something on their minds, or maybe (my third choice) this is all just laid-back attitudes about nudity and no incest is happening.  But I would not blame you if you just took off.  Tell the mom you're leaving because you not comfortable with the incestuous tone in the household (don't say "the incest in the house" because despite the circumstances, you really have no proof, but there is plenty of incestuous tone and that's not hurling accusations to say).  If she is NOT sleeping with her son (or deliberately encouraging his sexual interest even if he is not sleeping with her), this will give her some food for thought about what she is doing with this lax sexual tone in the house.  If she is in fact having an illicit relationship with her son, then you are well out of the situation anyway.

[AnnieBrooke]

When I said "they have clocks" I meant they have the out in the marketplace, i.e., "there are" clocks made with a little camera link.  Hammacher Schlemmer has them, I think.  But as I said, she would notice a new clock in the bedroom, too, and if she thinks you are suspicious of her, she'll really be awake to any new device.

[marisol_jose]

First off I want to say that is soooooo GROSS . How can a mother be so disgusting to even think about having sex or sexual encounters with her own SON. Noww we are not pointing any fingers but everything I just read in your post sounds way too fishy for me. I hope u find a answer and find closure to this because its sickning. If I were you I would just ask her straight up like when u see him getting. Hard on or something confront them BOTH .

[lobo29]

Thank you both for your comments.   Yesterday I told her I was going to work and told her son goodbye as I always do. I left the house with him in his room playing xbox and her laying in her bed watching TV.  I came back unannounced 45 minutes later.  She was on the computer in her room and he was laying on the bed, at the foot of the bed face down fully dressed watching TV. Both were surprised to see me. I just said it was a scheduling error and I am not working today. BUT 15 minutes later he gets up and goes back to his room. I say to him "you dont have to leave just because I am home, stay and watch TV".  He just says, "no, I want to play xbox anyway". She says "I told him to come in to watch a TV show that was on when he was little, (Fraggle Rock) I thought he would enjoy it, but he wasnt happy watching it".  So he left and I thought to myself "maybe I should have waited a little longer". But also thought maybe it is just all in my mind and they are just very affectionate. Today before work she tells me that while they were out shopping he tells her that he doesnt like to be touched anymore. I asked what do you mean?  She says, he doesnt want her to hug him all the time or comb his hair, or pucker kisses that he is not a baby.  I said "wow, thats interesting",  then asked how are YOU with all that"?  She said it hurts but I understand he is growing up. BUT I say, well we will see what happens and will see if he really means that.  I was thinking the whole time that I am being told this so I wont be so observant in the future OR come home unannounced again possibly to make me feel more comfortable within the house.  Today when I saw him in his room while I getting ready for work, I told him, you dont have to wait for me to leave to go in your moms room, just go now since youre not doing anything. At first he was hesitant but made his way there after a few minutes. I went down to wash up and was gone maybe 10 minutes, when I cam back he was not there. I asked where did he go? And she said "he didnt want to be in here, he went back to his room".   When I left he was playing xbox. I asked him, as I have asked him before "are you okay with me being here ALL the time"? I told him I dont want to intrude on his time with his mom. He told me that the more I am here the less time she bothers or annoys him so yes I do enjoy you being here. I told him goodbye, that I was leaving for work and that I wont be back this time till  late. Her and I talked a bit before I left.  She says all the right things about him growing up and wants me to help teach him some responsibility and discipline.. but I am not sure if she really means it yet. Overall it was a good day and all doors were open when she left our bedroom and went into his.  I did tell her thank you for leaving the doors open it makes me feel much more comfortable.   MAYBE it is all in my head.. I just dont know.   I do have a question though... why would ANY woman ask a man to completely move in with her and her son IF something was going on?  That stuff cant be hided forever. We were perfectly fine before I moved in and I didnt expect her to ask me to move in. IF something is or was going on wouldnt it be easier for her to just have me over now and then or her to my place as it was before. I NEVER would have seen the things I have seen.  This is why I still am NOT sure if aything is going on.  Anyway. Thanks again for your comments.  

[lobo29]

As far as the clocks (which I have seen) or anything else, she is VERY organized and VERY clean and knows every little and big thing in her room. We have 3 clocks in there now. I did think about the clock but she wouldnt go for another one in the room, She would say there's no need for it.  I did see a very nice touch lamp. and I do not have a lamp on my nightstand. Its $400.00 bucks though.  Will see how things go the next few weeks and see what happens. I just cant leave just because I THINK something is happening, I must know. She is very loving and caring with me and when we are together even if her son is home she spends the majority of her time with me, she is too good to me.  Her son has shown no jealousy whatsoever towards me or any bad attitudes when I am there. We get along pretty good. Thanks for the thoughts..