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investigation with child protective services
My son has been w/the current babysitter for 1.5 years and he loves her to death. She was also watching some kids next door (2 girls). well, I believe the mom next door was the one who called Child Protective services on the babysitter alleging she threw my son over her head and acorss the room, she took showers with my son, etc. My son went through the 1st interview at schoola dn they had concerns. Now he is having to go through a special 2nd interview with a forensic investigator and a detective. I find it hard to belive she has done these things. My son did deny being thrown across the room. is it possible him being six, he gets mixed up with the questioning, etc. Anyone else been thru this. Also, now we are not using the babysitter b/c of this situation, have been advised not to return him to her. It's just so much!!
I also wonder if the mom next door is angry at the babysitter and she is being vindictive, but I htink they would have to question her girls as well, right???
I also wonder if the mom next door is angry at the babysitter and she is being vindictive, but I htink they would have to question her girls as well, right???
I stayed with her b/c my son loved her and still loves her. He was asking today when he could see her again. So, yes, she is a bit feisty at time and quick to react.... I don't think she ever hurt him. I am concerned that she was calling the girls next door "evil".
Just have to say going by your description of this woman, it is probably best you look for a different sitter even if she is found innocent of the abuse. Doesn't sound like anyone I would want watching my kids. You shouldn't be afraid of making her lose her temper.
The detective also mentioned that she shoudl not be taking showers while having my child under her care, she shoudl be dressed and ready to take care of him when he comes into her possession.
My son is 6 and he has some sensory issues. He is very sweet and loving at times. He has a lot of energy, likes to play outdoors and explore. He is happiest I think when playing with nature. He loves flowers, any plants. He loves snow. He is in OT for sensory issues.
thanks for your wonderful post. It helped a lot. I just have to do what is best for my son and what the authorities recommend i do. I honestly don't know if anything happened or not, but I cannot take him back there. I have come to a conclusion as well, if she is found innocent, I think I am going to stay on the same path with new people and not go back into that mess. It's been too painful, whatever, the outcome.
I think my son is confused b/c he knows we are looking at new sitters. I have to find new sitters so I can go to work and do my job. there are no other options. I have to work.
He told me the other day that on the last day she babysat him, she told him she wasn't going to babysit for him and some other kids she babysits for until she can get the mess cleared up. that was before she knew she was reported to CPS. I find that strange.
She is a nice person, would give you the shirt off her back, but then other times, she would lose her temper and then not talk to you anymore and you could not get her to sit down and talk about it and she would threaten to find a new family to watch. It's like at times she just blew her top. This happened at least 4-5 times. I found it very upsetting esp since I am a single mom. She did a lot of nice things for my son, bought him gifts, food, etc.
But then she kept going back with this on/off again boyfriend, it was constantly they were broken up, then together, etc. It just seemed very immature. She is 21.
another time, I was using a weekend sitter and she wanted those hours because she said she had made "an investment" in my son. It's not right of me to yank hours from someone already promised and she would put me in a very bad position.
So I guess looking back I was very easily manipulated too by her. She is very strong and you don't want her to lose her temper.
I am just confused and looking back at a situation, etc.
I think my son is confused b/c he knows we are looking at new sitters. I have to find new sitters so I can go to work and do my job. there are no other options. I have to work.
He told me the other day that on the last day she babysat him, she told him she wasn't going to babysit for him and some other kids she babysits for until she can get the mess cleared up. that was before she knew she was reported to CPS. I find that strange.
She is a nice person, would give you the shirt off her back, but then other times, she would lose her temper and then not talk to you anymore and you could not get her to sit down and talk about it and she would threaten to find a new family to watch. It's like at times she just blew her top. This happened at least 4-5 times. I found it very upsetting esp since I am a single mom. She did a lot of nice things for my son, bought him gifts, food, etc.
But then she kept going back with this on/off again boyfriend, it was constantly they were broken up, then together, etc. It just seemed very immature. She is 21.
another time, I was using a weekend sitter and she wanted those hours because she said she had made "an investment" in my son. It's not right of me to yank hours from someone already promised and she would put me in a very bad position.
So I guess looking back I was very easily manipulated too by her. She is very strong and you don't want her to lose her temper.
I am just confused and looking back at a situation, etc.
there are allegations she took pictures of him with no clothes on and in the first interview he said yes she did. No, there are not any that I know of that they have found, of cousre, they would probably have to do a search warrant to find those and go through her home, etc. cell phone, computer, etc...
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You said that his initial answer to the detective was yes about taking showers with her, I would believe this. Detectives have a way of getting it out . In the latest interviews your son said he was confused I would guess that is because of all the change going on ,
his confusion comes from the thoughts of ....Did I do something wrong? Am I going to get the babysitter in trouble? Am I going to get in trouble?.....
As a mother....mother to mother you ONLY job in this world is to protect that child....you have absalutly no oblligation to this womans feelings or acountability to her actions.....you stated that she is munipulative ....when someone shows you who they are BELIVE them. Really!....you only priority right now is your son, it ***** that you have to find a new babysitter but be greatful that this happened before you got a call from the hospital that he was thrown accross the room, please let this be the warning.
Don't worry about the babysiter right now stay focused on what is important right now and that is YOUR son. I strongly recomend you take the advise of the professional, this is what they are trained in, keep taking your son and I pray that their isn't more your son hasn't told.
I know you said you felt bad, it's probably cause your a good person but again your concerns need to be for your son. Once you cut of contact with this babysitter you will be able to look at the situation from a different standpoint and will have better clarity, but please as someone (me) who was abused don't take the allegations lightly there is a reason that the girls told, there always is......I can't tell you what it would have meant to me if my own mother would have made me a priority instead she "chose" to think of my abuser and because he was a repeat offender she didn't want to go to the police becouse he would of went back to prision......um maybe that's where he belonged but no he is free to this day and able to reoffend.
I will be praying for your streanght right now as this must be a terifying ordeal. But be thankful that it isn't any worse. Please do not go back to the sitter or have contact with her you don't want to take a chance with your son, he only has one childhood and the affects of abuse last a lifetime. This happened as a blessing and take it as such and stay away from this woman for good. Just my opinion. Keep posting , and I will be praying for you and your son, you sould like good people and you don't deserve this. Bless