my son, child abuse, 6 year old.

[benjimom]

My son, I've posted on her multiple times. He is 6 and has sensory processing d/o.  In the recent past his babysitter was turned into CPS and now has admitted to child abuse.  So she has a child abuse without injury charge pending, she goes to court in late December. Anyway, yesterday at the new babysitter ,my son started to say the NEW babysitter did all these things like throw him on the floor, etc and that he was going to call the police on her.  He was doing fairly well over there.  He said this mroning she pulled on his ear, he denies it, but he is very sensitive to people touching him (sensory issues, etc).  I am thinking about taking him to a therapist to talk to them about the old babysitter situation.  Do you think this is a good idea.

She threw him on the floor when she got upset and thought he hurt her cat to make him feel like what it felt like to be thrown to the floor.  Then she made him sit down and she sprayed him with silly string and then she made the 10 year old spank him.  then she got her mom on speaker phone and had her yell at my son.  She had him make up a story that she was walking with him and they fell and he laughed.  He admitted to me that never happened and he did not laugh, he cried and that she told him to tell that story.   I reviewed with him that when someone tells you not to tell mommy something, it's a red flag and you need to tell mommy.

He's upset with the current babysitter, he has to go back tomorrow.  But sometimes lately, he's been upset with friends one day and back to friends the next.  I don't know if this is a developmental stage or what.

Also, at school, they hav ea time to share and he doesn't like to share what we have done together, etc (museums, parks, etc)-- he says it is his secret.  Is that unusual for a 6 year old?  

I'm just concerned, thanks for any help anyone can offer!

[benjimom]

Thanks to all again as usual! We have an appt with a therapist on Wed. I just want to be on teh "safe" side.

[kenneltech]

The best thing you can do for this boy is get him into therapy.  He may seem fine and seem like he isn't affected by what happened, but one day it will surface, and he really hasn't dealt with it, and BAM, all hell will break loose!  He needs to talk about what happened, but with a third party, not with you or anyone else too close to him.  

[RockRose]

benjimom,  this is pretty typical of kids who have been abused by someone they love.  They retell the abuse,  but pin it on someone else.  Kids do this with sexual abuse too - they have a detailed story and tell it about an adult who really didn't have that kind of access to the child - and will protect someone they care about.

I think therapy for him would be a really good idea.  He seems very conflicted.

[teko]

Oh yeah, Absolutely take him to a therepist so they can help him deal with all this. And yes, I think it peculiar that he would not share what you guys do and that it is a secret. How many other secrets is he keeping, no what I mean? It is always better to be safe than sorry and I am sure the other first sitter situation was really traumatizing to him. Best to get to the bottom of the issues now rather than later. AWE! I feel so sorry for that little guy and Mom too!

I hope you can get to the bottom of this. How hard this must be on you!