HOW TO DEAL

[sessa500]

HOW TO DEAL WITH A FAMILY MEMBER,THAT REPEATS ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS,SHE'S BEEN IN MANY [3] RELATIONSHIPS AND ALL TURNED ABUSIVE. ONE WAS SO SERVRE HER TODDLER WAS ALMOST KILLED FROM IT. SHE'S BEEN TO CLASSES AND I DON'T KNOW HOW OF THOSE CLASSES IS A PERSON SUPPOSED TO TAKE?SHE TOO IS ABUSIVE BUT...VERBERALY. BUT THAT DON'T GIVE ANY MAN THE RIGHT TO HIT A GIRL. I'M TALKING THE AGES OF 20-22. I JUST NEED TO KNOW WHAT MORE SHOULD I DO??? I DON'T WANT HER CHILDREN TAKEN AWAY FROM HER BUT..I DON'T WANT THEM AROUND THAT CRAZYNESS.?? ANY SUGGESTIONS?BEFORE I MAKE A BIG DESSION THEY MAY HURT EVERYONE. THANK YOU. I REALLY NEEDED IT.

[Rainbow_Ike]

First of all, it sounds like you poor relation need psychiatric intervention. GET HER HELP!

Second of all - having the authorities take away her kids and give them to a relative for awhile might be the "slap in the face" she needs to WAKE UP and seek REAL  HELP.

Don;t wait for this woman to ask or agree to help. She may have been abused severly as a child to accept this kind of treatment, or have very low self-esteem.

DON;T WAIT TO SEE HER NAME, OR HER KID'S NAME ON TV. Offer to take the kids in - or get a relative to do it - while she goes into the psych hospital. A person is not a punching bag.

HURRY! She does NOT "know what is happening". She is living in a fantasy world where "I can make him change." and "Things will be better tomorrow".

If classes (I assume court mandated0 did no good, a heart to heart chat is probably not going to do much good, except when it starts off with the sentence:
"If you don't give me (Or Aunt X) the kids temporarily, and check yourself into the psych hospital, I'm picking up the phone right now and calling child welfare. Then you lose them all together - and probably permanently, since you cannot change.
But it's better than having one of those apes who beat you up killing them or you! I love you!"

Ike

"Be strong, Be Strong, and we shall be Strong together!"

[cheshchesh819]

i think you know what you have to do,as you said her one child near missed death,and nono man should hit a woman,but she knows what is happening and is not changing things she just wont help herself,but you can help the children,sorry i think you needs to make the call before something serious happens to one of those kids i couldnt live myself if it was me and something did happen

[allmymarbles]

I think I would speak to her first before taking action. Maybe that would be a wakeup call. In other words, give her a chance to stop whatever it is she is doing. People tend to stand aside when they see a situation like this. Because of the silence she may not be aware of the damage she is causing and is allowing to cause.

[kenneltech]

A person can go to a hundred classes, and if they aren't LISTENING, nothing is going to help. This girl has to do this on her own, there is nothing anyone can do except get those INNOCENT little kids away from this mess.  They didn't ask for this, and if your family member gets mad at you, so be it, at least you can sleep at night knowing you probably saved innocent lives.

[margypops]

When the child was involved and injured were the Police called   and child services ? It does seem to me that some help /intervention for the children is needed, they are the ones that matter and their welfare..My opinion is that if you have to get help to protect them then thats what you have to do .If she is willing to change her attitude and get some counselling ,leave the partners alone ,you may be able to help her, but the children come first .Its your call , you have to make a decision make sure its the right one ..Good Luck