Another relationship bites the dust!

[Dezdon]

HI All,
  I posted recently about my marrige problems and just about loosing my wife if I dont make certain changes. Some other member posted they were going through simular problems.'
  Well,my wife comes home from work today and tells me her best friend left her husband this morning !  I about fell over! And this morning,I had finaly talked to my friend about my marrige problems and he told me secretyl, he is going through the same thing also! There must be something in the air.
  My wifes best friend hasnt had a good marrige in a long time. They have two small children. When they argue, he will text her and call her names like the "C" word" and such.Now Im watching this go on for awhile. Im wondering to my self, this guy scream at his wife and calles her the "C" word, and there still together ? I dont seem to listen to what my wife tells me am aperartly Im too jeluose ( even though she has her own cellphone, email address, own bank account,own car, is welcome to go visit her friends anytime or do volenteer work around town and girls night out, never even questioned, what she was up too, ever)  but her best friend marrige stayed together forever while they abuse the **** out of each other. It just didnt make since to me. NOw, I can see those two spending sometime apart till they learn to respect each other. Amybe my wife will look at this realise,  maybe she doesnt have it so bad. Yes, Im sure I can improve on the not listening thing and I am working hard on that.
  This is like the second couple we know that has split up and including ourselves are the second couple needed to pay more attention to each other or the marrige is in jeopordy within the last month.Not to mention the members here I have heard from for thier kind support.
-Dez

[Dezdon]

Amen Vicuser. I started asking myself that about a year ago and started to try and change myself. I went through my addiction with the oxy for six months all on my own. I was afraid to burden her her with more **** from me. How I despertly needed her help, but was afraid to even talk to her about. I didnt want her thinking even less of me.
  Ive never cheated, dont curse or even yell at her, I respect her, im a very mellow person.I stopped smoking weed and got my interest in oxys out of my life. She still has cut me off from sex and says it going to be awile till she trust i am listneing to her. Its like she waited till everything had bottled up so bad,,it was almost beyond repair.Im super easy to talk to also. I need the stuffing hugged out of me. Im with family but feel so isolated. I know I have value and so much to give, but nobody who wants it right now. Its like the judgment hammer has been thrown down and its gunna take an act of God to get a hug or intimacy. Its not so much about sex, but I love holding someone so close and tight. whaaa..poor me
BEARGIZMO...Im up in Maine..Howdy nieghbor!
Im also gunna start a new post about a love theropy program I ran across for all of us that having these martial problems. Its based on a movie and then theres a website attched to it that gives you 40 " love dares" to do in forty days to help rebuild the damage or make your marrige stronger. Its based on the movie "Fireproof". I'll post about it after supper.
Be good all, thanks all
-Dez

[VicUser]

Maybe more people need to take the attitude, am I the type of Husband or Wife I would want to come home to?

[adasfm]

:)

[scaredmom330]

I am so happy the two of you are doing better. stick with it, anything worth having is worth fighting for! take care

Scaredmom

[PromisedLand]

Lets hope she will stop and think about what is going on around her, and take the time, the courage and the effort to work with you in counseling or with a pastor to get things on the right track...something brought you 2 together...what was it...you need to find that again..

Our situation seems to be improving some, with some minor spats.  We had an argument yesterday and I said "I'm going grocery shopping.....I'll be back sometime" and my plan was to grab my ipod (which I did) and get on the road for a few hours..maybe over to the coast maybe to Boston...who knows...and then I discovered I'd left my wallet home, so I had to go home and get it and the missus had cooled off, I had cooled off, we hugged, etc and all was well.


Jim