MEDICAL DICTIONARY

[NorcoQueenoftheUniverse]

I know you all have probably already heard THIS one but I think it's worth repeating....


When the government gets finished reforming health care you might as well stay home and operate on yourself.......
So I thought you'd better learn some medical terminology...

THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT'S NEW, UNABRIDGED
MEDICAL DICTIONARY

BARIUM:     What you do when the patient dies
URINE:        The opposite of "You're out!"
CAUTERIZE: Made eye contact with you
OVA:            Finished; done with
SPERM:       To reject, look away from
DILATE:        To live a long time
ENEMA:       Opposite of a friend
NODE:          Was aware of
WHITE COUNT:  The number of caucasians
HERNIA:        Pertaining to a female's knee
FIBRILLATE:  To tell a small lie
D&C:              Where Washington is
BUNION:        Paul's surname
RECTUM:       Dang near killed him
PARADOX:     Two doctors
CORONARY:  Domesticated Yellow Bird
CONSTIPATION:  Endangered feces
PENIS:           Someone who plays the piano
HUMEROUS:  To tell us what we want to hear
INTESTINE:     Currently taking an exam
OUTPATIENT:  A person who has fainted
GENTIAL:        Non-Jew
SACRUM:       Holy
PAP SMEAR:  To slander your father
SEIZURE:        Roman Emperor
CAT SCAN:     When the Secret Service looks for Socks.

[leeisgettingclean]

working in health care as i do i fing this to funny, now everytime i hear one of this words i be thinkin of you

[ginsa]

OMG!!!! This is tooooo funny! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!! I needed a good laugh Peg. Thanks!