antisocial a side effect of the drugs

[DeeDee694]

Hi,
Someone posted this question awhile back:  Does substance abuse lead to antisocial behavior.  I would like an answer to this question also.  I've never been a social butterfly. Frankly, I love animals more than people. Ain't I awful? I do enjoy other people's company once I get going and they think I'm a blast.  But, I have noticed recently like maybe over the last 6-8 months I have more frequent periods of being a recluse.  Not only are they happening more frequently but they are lasting longer.  I go for long periods of not answering the phone----love caller ID. I've just dropped the few friends that I did have without a care. Dogs (my favorite) cats, birds, tropical fish.  Give me my animals and my grandchildren and I'm in 7th heaven.  My grandchildren  who live long distance got a Beagle a few months ago during my last visit down there and I could hardly contain my excitement. But getting back to the point. I read alot because it takes my mind off of my many worries and multiple health issues. I try to avoid going out of the house.  It can be the most georgeous day and I'm cooped up in the house.  One of the reasons for this is that I've recently had a few minor fenders and most of the time I'm in no condition to be driving.  So what used to be a pleasure really scares me, now  I keep having this recurring thought that I will hit a pedestrian.  OMG! Lastly, my memory has worsened considerably also I'm so confused.  Sometimes I have trouble following a simple conversation and forget following instructions. I feel very self conscious about this and was not even aware until family members  pointed this out to me. I'm in a complete fog.  I'm going for knee surgery on July 12--my 5th or 6th (I've lost count) for total knee replacement within 3 years.  I had osteoarthritis of both knees and did them both at the same time. I developed intractable MRSA a staph infection which is extremely difficult to eradicate.  There's alot of other issues but I don't want to stay up all night.  Getting back to the reason I'm here.  Do drugs do all these things to you?  I'm addicted to painkillers , no crack or H, etc.  Just pills.

[DeeDee694]

It was very hard for you and you were only on codeine and alcohol? Codeine isn't that
strong, in my opinion.  But the biggest danger for you was mixing the codeine with alcohol.' I know I shouldn't compare and everyone's body and it's response to drugs is different.  But compared to you I must be in for a really rough road ahead.  Please don't feel I've minimized or belittled what you went through.  That is not the intent at all. I'm just concerned about what symptoms of withdrawal I will experience since I'm on some pretty heavy stuff.  But that I can't know until I start doing it.  I think I'm pretty strong but I don't know if I'll be able to handle it.  I'll keep in mind my beautiful grandchildren and that  I want to be around to see them grown up and married with children.

[narla]

I have no idea which would be more difficult,I just know how hard it was for me,and I have to keep working on my sobriety,with after care and counselling.

Denise

[DeeDee694]

Hi Narla,

My time spent alone had has nothing to do with popping pills. I just don't seem to care about anything very much.  For one thing, I can't get around real well because of my knee and the pain so it's easier to just hang out in the bed and go out only when really necessary.  I read somewhere on here about the difference between emotionally-induced addiction and pain-induced.  The difference never occurred to me.  I'm definitely in the latter category.  I rarely drink alcohol and I simply cannot tolerate being physically uncomfortable so if there's a pill for the pain or discomfort, I'm taking it!  Which reason for partaking of drugs do you think is more difficult to kick?

[narla]

I was fine during the day but at night I went to my sanctuary (bedroom) and didn't like going out,I could do what I liked in there and nobody knew exactly what or how much I was abusing,I didn't feel guilty until 10 to 12 drinks and up to 8 codeine tablets later when the remorse kicked in and I'd constantly tell myself I had to stop.But the next night I'd do the same thing,I'd convince myself I couldn't help what I was doing and that it wasn't my fault I was born with addiction.Then I'd blame my childhood,it was always someone elses fault.