BEAT UP AND WORE OUT

[blitz6]

I have been coming to this forum for a long time now,some of you old timers will remember me. I would like to shed some light on addiction,I have seen several family members come here and ask how to help an addict,but I dont recall ever seeing an addict ask how they could help a family member during their w/d. After trying to help my wife get off vics and what ever else she could find,I gave up ! 18 monthes of pure hell was all I could take,some people on this forum told me early on that there was nothing I could do to help until my wife was ready,they were correct. I dont think addicts realy know what they do to family,in my case I lost all my future dreams and plans. Addiction will change every body involved and the scars may never heal. I am not here to prop you up(addicts) , I am here to tell you the fact, its not just poor you,look around you are destroying many lives ! addicts can stop using and get better but the damage they do to other people will last a life time,stop and think about all the pain you are doing to the people you love ,and just maybe that will be enough to get you over the hump. It is a choice and it is your choice !! I doubt I will be back here I lost the battle my wife is now my x and on here way to destruction !!!!

[1eagle]

Many have commented that we (addicts) are our own worst enemies...and from what I've seen posted on this forum I have to agree that we judge ourselves a bit too harshly - but then we do leave a long string of non-addicted casualties in our wake.....

[fly2dm00n]

thank you, it makes sense and you are 100 percent right

[GoingToMakeIt]

Very good post. We do affect those around us. We can't undo what we've done, true, but we can decide to change from here on out. I am saddened by your wife's story. I am sorry that you are going through it. I agree with IBKleen that your input is valuable.
Thank you for taking the time to share.

[IBKleen]

I am so sorry. Living with an active addict is pure he**. this disease destroys people, and it destroys families.

I admire you for wanting and trying to help her.

I only hope that you get whatever help you need to get on with your life. I also hope that you stay with the forum. You would be an asset here and could help others with similar problems.

Take good care of yourself.

[wishing_well]

I just want to say, you should be proud of yourself! It is very difficult for someone to get clean if they arent ready and you seem very sincere in trying so hard to help her. Just know you did all you could, and getting out was probably a blessing for youself. She will find her way. All we can do is pray it wont be too late. Its sad to know what these little pills can do to a person, and family! I am so grateful I realized it on my own before it effected anyone close to me (enough for them to notice or cause damage at least). I will never touch another pill again. The consequences are too great and my family is too important! Good luck to you and your future!

[uberadtx]

Why did you get help for yourself?

[Jennip]

Hi Blitz6,

I can only imagine what you have been through and I am sure that it has been terrible on you.  Trust me, I know what I put my family and friends thru, and all the other innocent people that I managed to hurt along the way.  I think about them everyday of my life and sometimes the guilt is unbareable.  I am sure you did everything you could but everyone is right when they say she has to want it herself.

I wish you the best of luck and maybe losing you will make her realize that it is time to make a change.

Jenni