Fighting over Vicodin

[oxyaddict420]

These Pills are horrible in sooo many ways yet the cravings are insane.  I had given the pills to my fiancee to help me control how many i take.  Well It was supposed to be like 2 7.5 vicodinES maybe 3 times  a day.  Well this morning first dose I told her please give me 3 and then the rest will be only 2 i PROMISE!  Well doese 2 comes up and i ask for 3 again. She says no hundred times and I just dont take no for an answer. She got so frustrated that she threw the bottle at me and left the house saying do whatever the f@@k you want.  So what do I do?: I pop 4 of them. How pathetic...  I dont expect kind words, or nice responses because so many are actually trying to quit.  I on the other hand am just bailing out.  Whoever reads this that is actually withdrawling right now, use this as a reason to stay clean and keep working it.  See how bad of decisions we can make because of these damn pills?!!!!!! GGOD LUCK TO EVERYONE THAT IS DOING IT! GOD BLESS

[oxyaddict420]

Yes i was a very heavy pot smoker for many many years.  I have only left it alone due to being such an addict to the pills.  As mentioned above I NEVER  mix the sh!t...  The cocaine was bad for me too. It started with doing a sheet(mixing baking soda with coke, little water and smearing it on foil then burning it from the bottom and using a straw to suck up the smoke).. Just made me feel numb, didn't get high.  Then I tried snorting a line. I felt like I was a god. I wanted to feel that way forever.  And spent a fortune trying.  Then had a good hookup that I tired crack with for my first time and I liked it.  I used and abused that **** for abour 2 yrs 15-17yrs old. Then like I said went to rehab and have been clean for going on 10 yrs now.

I get my Drug of choice on the 28th which is the 15mg immediete release oxycodone. Actually prefer them to oxycontin.  I will get 90-100 of them at $2.00 a piece(great price for here) but I have to give 25 of them to the person I got the 4 80mg oxycontin from.  Vicious cycle my friend. I am glad to know I am not alone, but no glad we are addicted ya know what i mean?  I hope we can fight it one day and beat this sh!t man.. thanks for chatting bro. Take care and have a great christmas!

[lostsoul2]

I knew by your screenname weed was there.  I used to smoke like a dirty chimney, but then it started making me really paranoid all the time, and it felt like my heart was going to pop sometimes, so  Iweaned off it.  Occasional relapse, but rarely.  Cocaine was a problem.  I did it almost everyday for over a year.  Bought it large quantities at a time.  Much cheaper.  Had a really good connection.  Then I started getting the feeling like I would never come down, then major paranoia set in, not to mention daily nosebleeds and nightly swollen sinuses to the point of not being able to pass any air at all through them.  I finally threw what I had away and haven't done it since.  Lost my guy's #.  Then the vics helped getting over the coke, then  I f***** up my back again, and the downward spiral keeps going.  The thing people don't get is that the addict feels worse about himself than anyone else ever could.  Self loathing sets in, and of course the cure for that is another pill or puff or snort or whatever.  It's a battle.  Merry X-mas my man and just know you aren't alone.  I have a refill coming in a few days and I know I'll cave again.  You're not the only one.  Thanks for chatting, bro.

[oxyaddict420]

I feel you man. I just got four 80mg oxycontin today and broke one in half and took it right away, and then waited like 6 hours(usaully i wait 2) then took another 40mg.  I am OUT OF CONTROL MAN.  My life is one bad choice to another. What is fu*^%^% is that I know what the problem is. I know what needs to change to make it better but just can't. Or choose not to due to being so frigging weak.  Thanks for talking with me man. I also used to be addicted to cocaine, booze, and weed. Beat them all but the pills and the weed.  I NEVER SMOKE WHEN I TAKE PILLS--NEVER-- I hate the mixture feeling. But when I have no pills I try and get that good a$$ chronic weed and just blaze like cheech and chong. Doeant really help alot, but I dont make the best choices. I hopw we can one day conquer this sh!t man. GREAT LUCK TO YOU BROTHER! Merry x-mas

[lostsoul2]

I tried to taper a little but it didn't work.  I started withdrawing while in the taper so I just took what I had left and enjoyed it.  Now I pay the price.  In the movie 8mm there's a great line, "If you dance with the devil the devil don't change, he changes you."  Or a philosopher, Nieztche I believe, once said, "If you stare too long into the abyss, soon the abyss begins staring into you." That sums up these pills well, I think.  They are always the same, they will always be the same, and we weren't always under their control.  We chose to dance, we chose to stare, now we have lost control.  I've been dancing with Norco, cocaine, and pot for a long time.  I've quit two, but these f****** Norcos are the devil in disguise.  Sold my soul to feel like someone else.  I got what I was searching for, some great times, great buzzes.  But now I don't know who the f*** I am.  Danced a waltz with the devil, stared into the abyss because I had to know what was on the other side.  Now I don't know what I am anymore.  Damn this addictive gene and my own stupid curiosity and lack of self-confidence.  Hang in there, brother.  I think you know the tale.

[oxyaddict420]

I did so good yesterday compared to my normal.  I woke up and tried taking a half of a 7.5vicodin but that didnt do anything. After 3 hours of w/d I gave in and took 4 of them. Waited for what seemed like forever, then took 3 1/2 with a soma at 5:00pm I stayed up until 12:30am christmas morning WITHOUT taking anything else but ibprofen and klonopin. I was proud.  I now have only 7 5mg vicodin and a 30mg mscontin(dont really like)  I woke up and took 4 of the 5mg vicodin(should have only taken 3, so now i have 3 of them left along with that 30mg mscontin.  I am hoping to make the vicodin last the entire day and night, and save the mscontin for tomarrow. I have to take a 4 hour round trip to take a mother in law home.  

[justflippindoit]

Hey you should be able to handle it. Remember. the discomfort is inside of you, no else can see it, so be yourself and push through it. engage engage engage, you'll be at your best when you force yourself to interact with others even though everything insde you is saying "go hide" but day 4 should be a turnng point for you, take a nice hot shower or bath before people strt getting there, and while in the shower, before your get out , turn the water on ice cold for just about 3 seconds :-) this will kick your natural endorphines into gear. During the day and night tomorrow splash some cold water on your face. Day 4 is the way back to you so make it through and day 5 is much easier, you'll be going back and forth till about day 6 and 7 and then your brain will finally come to the conclusion its not getting any more. IT ALL IN OUR HEADS. Have a Good day tomorrow. We have to decide to be well. Our brains are marvelous creations. We are in control.