I forged hydrocodone prescriptions and now the PD is calling ??

[hondacr250]

I am a professional with 3 beautiful children, a good job.  I recently went to rehab for a 10-15 a day 10/325 hydrocodone addiction. It was the best thing I could of ever done.  Now I am on suboxone for withdrawals, and in intensive outpatient therapy, while on STD from my employer.  The PD where the last "script" was done is now calling.  I have enough street smarts to know to NOT answer ANY questions without an attorney present.  I honestly cannot afford an attorney to consult for this, even if an arrest occurs.  My life savings is depleted for various estate battles with X girlfriends from my dad's death.  I cant touch the money that is there for me for another 4 years.

I have done extensive reading, and know the rehab was the best thing I could of done, for more reason(s) than one.  I am in intensive outpatient therapy for the next 3-5 weeks, so I am off on Short Term disability from my employer.  Now I find myself switching cars with my husband to avoid a run in with the police concerning this.  I know if I refuse to answer any questions, they will assume my guilt.  So now I am avoiding them.  I know if they are persistent, I cant avoid them forever.  What really hurt me the most, was my teenage daughter that avoided my phone calls while in rehab answered their phone call yesterday and told them anything they wanted to know, concerning my whereabouts.

I cant believe I let a drug ruin my life like it has.  My husband was clueless about it all till yesterday, I knew I had to tell him before I end up incarcerated or taken in for questioning.  I read where this happened to someone else, and they thought honesty would serve them best when it came to answering questions.  Being so "honest" got them additional charges, after all the police have a job to do.  I want to remain sober and look towards my future.  My past is now coming back to bite my in the a$$ so to speak, and I am walking on egg shells.  I know I deserve it and was a total idiot for doing it at all.  Any thoughts or suggestions?

[hondacr250]

my children are 15,13 and 3.  I am so ashamed.  And someone else asked this question, was it before rehab, yes it was.  I have been sober for 1 week today.  I knew it was a matter of time before I got caught, and knew I couldnt do it on my own, that monster was much bigger than me.

[LIZZIE LOU]

hey...you must have been on the hiv forum??  my son has hiv...:(

one of my other sons is moving into an apartment today with his g/f.  this is davis, the recovering crack addict, who seems to be substituting alcohol for the drugs.  he is doing well now and attending meetings on a regular schedule but the mom in me still worries about him moving out.  i pray that he will stay strong.

huggs,
kim

[hondacr250]

And I didnt call it in, I wrote my own.  I feel so stupid and full of shame.  I am about to leave for group therapy.  I am not comfortable discussing this with them at this time, talking this way and in person are two different scenarios.  There are a few people in therapy I find to be very annoying and judgmental.  Thanks so much for the responses and listening, it means allot to me.

[lonote]

I'm feelin your your fears. I've been in trouble also, and the monster. oh my God.  I also take suboxone. We have similar stories. my kids are older now. You wern't implying harming yourself were you? (When refering to even checking out your life ins.policy).That my dear would be the worst idea. What state do you live in if I may ask?                       Cathy

[lonote]

I was at  the brest cancer one aids one, but i saw you at a grief one.

[peekawho]

You really need an attorney.  Even if you can just go to consult one very briefly, I'd do it as soon as possible.  

And if your husband has an mj habit, I hope he gets it all out of the house, like this minute.  If you both have drug habits, you could wind up with CPS taking your children out of the home.

Bad problem.  Good luck.