Keep on keeping on - Day 8

[ymerej]

Well, here I am at day 8. I went to my doctor yesterday, apparently I developed a heart arrhythmia (which has been going crazy today) and increased lymphocytes. Maybe from the OCs. Was prescribed clonidine .3mg. Feeling really emotional today. Music is making me cry. I switched soap around the same time as the detox, and now the smell of my skin is making me sick. Everything is creating some sort of exaggerated response. I really need to get it together. My girlfriend is moving back in tonight. I'm not sure if I feel resentment towards her for leaving me alone or not. We'll see. I really hope tomorrow is better than today. Gonna start riding my bike to work on Monday (2hr total!). Hopefully that helps restore the damaged receptors. I have to get out of this mental funk. Still keeping up with the aftercare.

Thank you again to everyone here. You have been a big outlet for me, and I have learned a lot.  

[ang_811]

keep up the fight and have a postive attitude. it really does get better i promise.
congradulations 8 days .

[FassFeat]

18 Days and feeling great. Really I am pretty much back to normal, and the last week or so has flown by. The first week felt like 2 weeks. You will be feeling very good soon, just gotta protect it. I take great pains to make sure I don't get in any situations that will test my resolve. Good luck, congrats on clean time and God Bless. Keep up the good fight. Andrew

[ymerej]

I know EXACTLY what you are talking about, Feat!! My dog picked the wrong day to have horriblllle flatulence earlier this week. I was doubled over gagging at times. Everything had an odd smell to me. Still kind of there, good to know it will lead to improvements. Got a bit worse today, but have now leveled off. Gonna crash soon.
How are you feeling these days? You are on 18 days, correct? Give me some positivity. Glad to here you are still in it.

[FassFeat]

I went through 2-3 days off my taste and smell being messed up. I was horrible, I went to a football game and I could smell everybody, their breath, what they were eating.... maybe it was just the inside of my nose. I thought I was permanently damaged. When it stopped, I found that what had occurred was that my sense of smell and taste had been restored better than ever.. I can smell if someone is cutting grass a mile away, and food taste so good, too good. I am going to have to incorporate a diet into the program now. Just wanted to let you know.. this too will pass. Go smell some bread or dogfood. argggghh. LOL You will be fine, best of luck and God Bless.. You are healing my friend.

[ymerej]

Thanks Punkin (that was kinda funny to type),

I think I am a pretty introspective person. The past month alone has exacerbated this theory. I'm not sure what is worse yet, 11 days of crucial wd's or 1 month of subtle ones. I think the latter hits me more psychologically. Like Chinese water torture. I've been through both now, and though I would have preferred to have it all done by now past experiences have shown that in my weakest state animal instincts take over and I do whatever to ease the suffering.
I tried Suboxone before, but took it too soon and was thrown into precipitated wd's (apparently since my tolerance went WAY up so did the need to wait longer than 24 hours. Dr misread my COWS and that was that). That was torture, torture that I couldn't relieve. Or relive. So bad.
Nobody put on any sad music 8 days into your detox!  

[ymerej]

Man I know, you are f'in right. Every day has been getting easier. Just fell down a couple of notches the past couple of hours. Annoying calls keep coming in tempting me to make that plunge, even though I said no thanks, but I have ignored them all. I know I can do this...so can you.
Thanks!

[Punkinhead75]

Thanks for sharing.  It definetly gets easier.  One little hint:  Pay attention to what you are going through.  Where you are at now will be a tool to help somebody else later.  God Bless!!!!

[armbarjim]

Bro keep it up, just remember it gets better! Evently you will look back and be like what the hell was I thinking stay strong brother you are a warrior like me you can do this!