Self-intervention

[Lindsay_T]

Hi everyone. For more than 100 days I stayed off vicodin. Then I relapsed. I am in meetings and counseling and have great people to call. So I have to fortify my efforts even more. But mostly, I have to WANTt to quit.
While I was on my 100day winning streak, I remember saying, "one day plus one day...." It was really slow going in the tens and twenties. The thirties and forties were no fun either, but by the fifties things started settling down for me.
Well now, one day plus one day isn't working. I just came out from a long prayer and my goal - just for now is one hour plus one hour. I just want to get through today, Sunday. Okay, in all honesty I just want to get through this hour. one hour plus one hour at a time. That's as far as I can see right now. Dayum it.
PS: If you are toying with taking just one, or a few, or just a "spell" of a few, DON"T DO IT!!!!! It was very hard for me to come to this minute right now of even having a bright idea (duh) to try for one hour without using. Stay strong!!!!

[throwindatowl]

Important to remember. Just because you take a couple pills doesnt mean you have to keep taking a couple pills. Stay strong. Ive made the mistake you wanna make. Its never worth it. You had alot of days and you may have forgotten that part. Its never worth it.

[laurel453]

i still count one hour plus one more...not with the pills but when i worry a lot about my problems... i just remember how i went through those first days and i do the same...one hour more, a deep breath and another one hour... you will soon be over those hours and one day more will start working ( even if like me, you have to start counting hours some days because life is not easy, being clean is what keeps me sane ) All the best, lindsay, you can do it !! :)

[Lindsay_T]

Thanks guys. Whew. Got through all of the hours one at a time today. I did not have the will to set a goal that was any higher. Wow. Maybe there is a lesson there for me. Tomorrow night I have a good group meeting, celebrate recovery. I m gonna go, and that is good to look forward to.
Gnarly, thanks for your prayers. I took your advise and did some reading. Tonite I'll read the Bible before sleep. I want the Holy Spirit to take this one for me. I know I can't do it. I just don't know how to surrender especially when so much is coming against me. But I do know that God's grace is enough.
James, Yes, TOGETHER we can fight and help and tell the truth and keep coming back on the right path. Drug free is the way to life. I'm pulling for you. I wish I could make your decisions for you. It'd be so easy for me to protect you and crush the addiction monster. And it'd be so easy for you to crush mine. Ya know? For some reason, we are in too cozy with our own monster!!
Sara, Your confidence in me means a lot. I need to keep going and going!!! So... Your Vikings pulled it out. I'm glad for the team.  The interim coach looked so happy. Unlike my Colts. Sad boyz tonight.
peace and hugs, Lindsay

[gnarly_1]

Hey Lindsay....sorry to here you struggling....the prayer was a good idea it always help me
pray for strength to go threw it....I have had my days where I just couldn't wait for it to be over it no fun when your craving or thinking about pills all day.....you did 100 days clean
it proves you can do this...so today you take it hr by hr we all get days like this just keep up the fight....if you can get to a meeting and get your feelings out  it will help and remember feelings are only temporary tomorrow will  come and you will have a whole new outlook on things...try kicking back and lissinin to some music...get outside and go for a walk I know you believe in God read the word it cleanses the mind...you will get threw this...its just 1 day
hang in there I will pray for you good luck and God bless......Gnarly  

[stilltrying1965]

Hi Lindsay i to relapsed i think its part of the prosess. You can do this lindsay we know you can minute by minute I have faith in you Just do what i done dust yourself off and start again ill do it with you if you want to. We can help each other.Best of luck to you lindsay and when you start dont look back only forward you deserve a good clean happy life ,,,James

[dominosarah]

Sometimes that is just what it is too, one hour at a time.  We know you can do this Lindsay, now you need to know you can.  The longer you go and continue with your recovery the more self confidence you will gain.  Your doing great so keep it going!!      sara