feel weak today about the idea of w/d....scared

[joyagain]

Vick595 I need you!!! I don't know how to send you a message directly.  Anyone else please reply too.  I thought I wasn't scarIed of w/d, but today I feel really scared of it because there is never a good time althoughf I will run out of pills in about a week and have to wait almost two weeks for another refill.  I then will be done for refills until the end of summer.  I am prepared to be done on my last refill, not this one.  I find myself thinking that I really need the pills to at least last me until Saturday because that is going to be so especially busy for me.  Three boys each with a baseball game, one son with birthday party the same day, (bbq at my house), and my daughter will be competing for the attention that day, then of course Easter bunny, Church the next day, and Easter celebrations.  I cannot do it without the pills right now, or at certainly not in w/d's.  Please help me, you suggested only 6 pills today. I will do that.  How about a good sleep tonight and only 4 pills tomorrow?  I know I am not giving you all the w/d commitment I should right now, I will, I am crying as I write this.  I wish you all the success that you are seeking today.  God Bless!!!

[joyagain]

and to janvic60 thankyou for responding, your posts are definitely helping me to get prepared.

[janvic60]

I will back up what vicki said.The thing that i did when i started running out is I canceled my refills and told my dr not to prescribe them to me anymore. That was hard. I didnt trust myself. By doing that I left myself no choice but to suck it up and do it. I was so scared and I was also hiding my addiction from my family so I had to pretend that i was sick, well I really was because of w/d. that may not work for you. I wish that I had told someone so I wouldnt have been so alone. It was just me and God. I am starting on my 5th week clean. still no energy but life is sooo much better.vicki if you are reading this too,I think you are awesome.

[vicki595]

Hi...I'm here.   I know you can't commit right now.  That's okay because this takes a whole body and soul commitment!  When you quit it's got to be forever!  My only concern is that you'll never find a "good time" to do this.  You're still talking about that refill...
That said, don't cry. At least you're tapering.  I know you want to do this and I know how hard this is.  Six pills today. Four pills tomorrow is good. Stay with that for one week. Take ONE pill at a time and space them out throughout the day.  That's better than nothing and will give you back some control.  It would be better if you didn't get anymore refills.
Everyone is scared of withdrawals. But,I think,the real fear should be relapse. That's why aftercare, such as NA,is extremely important. ( Read the post by Ga Guy). I
also think an addiction specialist would be helpful to you.

Now,to send a private message...move the mouse so that the curser hovers over my screen name. A small box will appear with my info and the option of sending a note or message. Click on message. Another screen will come up and then just write your message and click send.  I will reply and the inbox at the top right of your screen will show you have one message. Try this and we'll test it out.  Also,on the "health pages"
there's a post that explains how to navigate Med Help.

Vicki  xo