Lost

[SbeccaRue]

I have no idea what to do, I am not sure if this is going to end up a question or just a vent....I am 28 years old I am an alcoholic. I went into rehab june 3rd with a bac of .358 I did 30 days and got out of rehab July 3rd and went into a sober living home which I loved and was doing fantastic got a job was working on saving money to get my own place for me and my amazin' seven year old son named Nicholas Shane. Well anyway after a lil' less then a month I got kicked out for about the dumbest reason I've ever heard, My husband got 15 years in prison and I love him to death and am going to stick by his side just like he's stuck by my side through this whole ordeal of rehab and fallin back off the wagon and gettin back on he's my biggest support anyway, when I moved into the sober living home my understanding was that they had a phone they did not, so I had no way of talking to my husband without thinking I gave my husband my roommate (also the house manager)'s number, her husband is doing a 30 year bit in prison also,  i didn't think she would mind, her husband freaked out that another man in prison had her number and it was a huge ordeal and one day she got very mean with me and said "since you have a job get a damn phone and talk to your husband that way" i got upset and said "it was my damn understanding that this place would have a phone when  I moved into her" I guess that didn't go over so well they ended up saying breech of confidentiality and kicked me out. I am not staying back at my parents home and have NO IDEA what I am going to do, my parents for obvious reasons DO NOT want me here, I have done HORRIBLE things to my parents in my addiction and I completely understand but I have no idea where I am going to go from here or what to do. I don't want to go back into rehab I have been sober for 2 months today but I don't know what else to do, I am from a town of 3000 people and not many options.....anyway I guess I am done venting.....Just scared!!!

[SbeccaRue83]

I am posting under a new name because I couldn't get into my other account but I am the one who started this post! No Nicholas wasn't with me in the sober living house kids weren't allowed, he was staying with my mom/dad his dad's mom/step dad 2 of my 3 brothers and 2 of his dad's brothers. Just kind of enjoying his summer hanging out with all his cousins. I am staying with my parents working my hardest to stay sober haven't had a drink since June 3rd very proud of myself! Found a doctor PCP and a RA doctor in the last month who are now working together to manage my pain, I've lost 47 pounds in the last month, and am functioning as  a normal human being cleaning, cookin, playin with my son without crying.. (I mostly drank because it was something to help with the pain i could get readily and legally but it got EXTREMELY out of control)

[Nighthawk61]

Good work going to AA and NA. Please don't allow this to mess with you're clean time. When it rains it pours. I am so sorry that you are going through this, you would think that your friend could have just asked you to please get yourself a phone, you would think that she could understand, not a very nice person inside, i'm afraid. Where is Nicholas, was he with you in the sober house? Where have you gone? Have you checked out the homeless shelters while in transition to your own home? Please stay clean~ don't feel sorry for yourself, although you are in a terrible position it will take your strength not your weakness to get you out of this one alive. Your husband had a roof over his head, first things first look after yourself and don't worry about him right now, he can look after himself. Please keep posting. People here care about you. God Bless

[SbeccaRue]

Yeah I go to AA and NA because it's all addiction and because I live in a tiny town of Louisiana, Missouri so it's hard finding anything around here, No it wasn't in my hometown it was the next big city! Thanks for all the support you guys are awesome.

[samari10]

if you go to a homeless shelter, they may help you transition into getting an apartment of your own, or until you can find a sober living house, you may have to relocate, no big right? You got to do what you have to do. No matter what you've got AA . Please keep sober, this could be enough to fall off the wagon again, maybe you should go right back into treatment and get another chance at sober living, try to go to a different rehab so that the sober living house in that area will accept you. please keep posting, and make friends on here to get you through.

[dominosarah]

Was this sober living in your hometown?  Do you attend AA?

[CWKavinRAS]

See if you can find another sober living that is willing to understand your specific situation...Best of luck..