Triggers

[dominosarah]

With spring in full gear and summer approaching it is the time for many outings, picnics, heading to the lake, and BBQ's.  Many of these events will have alcohol as a main topic.  This can be a big trigger for many of us.  For me it requires more meetings and avoiding most of these events.  I surround myself with healthy sober people.  I go for many walks in the summer along with bike riding and i cant forget about the late night fishing at the water plant!!    Gotta throw this one in too......Im going to be a grandma to a baby girl in August.  I am truely grateful to being clean and sober.  Just doesnt get any better than that~~~~~~~~sara

[dominosarah]

That is probably the hardest part i had dealing with no drinking as it is so sociably acceptable and you can buy it anywhere.  I was very angry in the beginning as i thought the world should change to acommedate me.  Little did i know that on my journey with recovery it was me who had to accept the fact that i cant have a single drink or pill but others can.  My recovery is just that, mine.  Learning to live life on life's terms was a biggy for me as i always wanted to challenge everything.  I wanted to be in control when i had no control to begin with.   I always have my guard up and hold my sobriety/clean time the most sacred thing in my life and i will do whatever i have to do to protect that.  Ahhh the things i have learned and accepted!!!  One wise man told me once to pray for the journey, not the destination~~~~~~~~sara

[Addict63]

Great subject this morning Sara! I jumped on it instantly.

I suppose my wife could be a trigger for me. After dinner my wife sits with the TV, plays her little Nintendo thingy and relaxes, which is something she deserves, and has completely earned every day. She also has a couple of glasses of wine. Sometimes she gets a headache during her work day from her high stress job, her change of life, or whatever, and our primary doc has given her a script for Darvocet-N. I can tell if she's taken one. She's a bit more talkative. :-)

The same doctor gave me Vicodin 7.5 for my bad back 2 years ago, which I've now stopped, with 61 days clean in NA. I'm also a recovering alcoholic with 27 1/2 years without a drink, thru TGOG in AA.

Now about me. That's who I always need to write/talk about when it comes to addiction. I've earned a black belt in al-anon over the years.  Instead of my wife, I need to always look at myself and what I've been doing, and unconditionally allow my wife the dignity to be exactly who she is at all times. She can have 2 drinks and stop, and one Darv and stop. So can't our Doctor BTW, whom we both love and have known for many years.

Me? No way. If I have a glass of wine and a darvocet I won't be able to stop. One's too many and 1000 is not enough. If I took a drink or a drug I'll instantly start to suffer from more. I'll want more and more of anything that's mind altering. I've just visited, and I'm recovering from there. And, some how my HP and my AA/NA programs got me through months of VicodinES without a drink!

When I except my devastating weakness as a disease, which is the foundation and strength of all of our 12-step programs, I can move on. I can busy myself by finding meaning and a new purpose in life. I can go to wet places without being bothered, I can remain married to a lady who can have ONE (lol), and I can have the willingness to change only myself.

My favorite quote from one of my recovery books:
"It's not where we were that counts, but where we are going".      

[ibizan]

i see cardinals in the winter!well i hear them first...then i know spring is coming but their flaming redness against a snow treebranch is incredible!then at nite...the eastern screech owl is trilling high up in the treebranches...they spot a meal....mice or other rodents!and THEN when i take the dogs out late HIGH up in my neighbors tree is this HUGE opossum glaring at us!i feed the nieghborhood stray cats so racoons and possums partake of the free buffet as well!

[ibizan]

look at it this way dear......u have a horrid allergic reaction to alcohol and when u drink u break out in spots!:)like a diabetic shouldn't have sugar ur system cannot tolerate the alcohol!it wreaks havoc internally and externally!

[dominosarah]

You are strong my friend and you will stay on your path in recovery.  I have faith in you and am extremely proud of what you are accomplishing~~~~~sara

[drifter0213]

controlling your environment is paramount to sobriety i am safer not being around drinkers so going to parties is my trigger also I agree with Narla :)

[dominosarah]

I havent seen my cardinals yet this year but i have the feeders out and ready for their arrival.  I also have a male and female mallard that show up in my backyard every year.  I never enjoyed nature before when i was using but now i can sit out back and watch for hours.  I used to hear people say why drink or use drugs to get high when you can get high on life.  I never understood that till i was clean and sober.  It is so true........sara

[narla]

I find it hard because I have a lot of good friends who like to have a drink,and it's not fair for me who has a problem to tell these people who don't not to drink.My husband collects red wine and has a glass or two maybe once a week or once a fortnight I can't tell him not to drink just because I have a problem,my daughter likes a drink every now and again do I tell her she cant enjoy herself because I have a problem.I just make sure I don't drink,it is hard at times but I'm doing it,I considered having a drink one night when I was out with a friend,she wouldn't let me she said I'd regret it in the morning and she didn't want to be the one with me if I did drink,she was right I would have hated myself in the morning,so I'll just keep doing what I'm doing and hope I can keep strong.

Denise

[ibizan]

In the early years of my recovery warm weather was a thought for partying.But i kept it just a thought with meetings sober healthy ppl and outside activities.Today a walk,sitting in the backyard watching and listening to the cardinals red headed and pilated woodpeckers and having my greyhounds heads in my lap are what gets me high....and it just don't get much better than that!:)Congrats granma to be!:))))