Do I have social anxiety?

[kreed324]

Hi there, so lately I've been thinking do I have SA? I'm 15, I've always had a hard time making friends, I only have 4-5. But when friends text me and want to hang out I lie, and just stay home, I don't like going out. I hate being in front of people, I feel embarrassed. I'm very negative about myself, I feel very ugly, and I'm always saying negative things, I gave my teacher hard time last year a lot because I don't feel confident. I often get sharp stabbing chest pains, they stay in one area often, sometimes move to the right but not rarely. I'm always to myself, and when I'm at parties I just stick to my friend. I don't like speaking up, I tell my mom to tell a waiter, or my friends parents what I want to do. I don't eat that much in front of people, when ever I'm left in line at grocery stores for a quick second. I panic and get nervous. When strangers approach me and talk to me, my heart starts racing, and beating fast. When presenting my chest hurts, and I move A LOT, it's really noticeable. I try to make certain people laugh but I can't I'm just scared to talk to people, my voice gets deep and raspy, I just hate it. And I'm scared to speak up to teachers, a lot, when I need help or something. I hate talking on the phone with others. When shopping I ask my dad to come in the section where the clothes are at, because I get so scared and nervous.  I often think a lot, and worry. I feel like I bother people, and I'm annoying. Sometimes when I worry I get bad chest pain. Is it possible that I have SA?

[Paxiled]

Don't get hung up on labels, and don't search the old Google for things that might be wrong with you.  Anxiety is anxiety -- the labels are more for insurance company and pharmaceutical company purposes.  I'd ask how long this has been going on for -- teenage years are full of changes as you grow from a kid into an adult.  Hormones go nuts, life starts getting harder, and you get exposed to more information you have to process.  So if this is new and it isn't how you've always been, I'd see if I couldn't do something about it.  Having 4-5 friends is actually a lot -- most people call people friends, but they're really acquaintances, and as you get older true friends will be separated from just acquaintances and when you start getting into serious relationships romantically and you move up in your education time gets less for the things of youth.  Basically, we live according to our age and what that brings us.  So again, if this has been going on for awhile and it's compressing your world and making you very anxious and unhappy, then you might have a problem that needs attention from a therapist or counselor.  If it's new, it might just be something you're going through as we all go through things and not something that needs to be medicalized.  You know yourself and your life better than we do, so think it out and see if these are things you can change or just part of life or things you need to do something about with help.

[kreed324]

I've always been like this, since I was toddler, in elementary school I've always had problems with people, and I always kept to my self

[Paxiled]

Did it always make you unhappy?  And I've gotta tell ya, 4-5 friends is far from keeping to yourself.

[kreed324]

Yes, it did. I would often lose it in school, I went to see the school therapist for a bit. I want to make people and my teachers laugh but I can't, I'm too scared, and nervous.