My extreme anxiety is slowly killing me

[lozzbra374]

Hello,

I am 15 and I have been diagnosed with extreme anxiety and depression.

I was in class 2 days ago and I started to panic to the point of me shaking, sweating and couldn breathe. My parents came and took me to the doctors. I have never wanted to igmit I have a problem and so I was screaming telling them not to take me. I was still shaking and couldnt stand at this point. I was close to throwing up and passing out. After waiting in the doctrs office I fianally got called in to his office. At first he was in a panic and was close to calling the ambulance and the hospital. I was still shaking and wanting to throw up and pass out when I left. He told me I should be fine but to book another appointment so that the doctor can perscribe me medication for my anxiety. I got home and passed out for about 3 hours. I woke up to the phone ring and whilst I was talking I ended up running to the bathroom trowing up every where. I dont know what to do. I get so bad sometimes and I cant cope at all, mentally or phisically. What should I do.. ? :(

[lozzbra374]

Thank you so so much for everything.
I know what you mean by the whole, getting told something by an adult but the way you put it made me feel abit better.
I see a therapist every 3 weeks but it doesnt help me.
I eat alot but I feel so so fat and so I make myself throw up and sometimes I go to the fridge and there might be the most amazing food in there but everything makes me want to puke but because im hungry ill eat it and then I end up being sick because I didnt want it but then im hungry again so it all starts again.Dad says this may be a sign of bulemia and anorexia I hate myself when I eat because it takes me a while to lose weight. I am 50 kg :( that is terrible. I want to be skinny and I want someone to look at me and be like "wow shes gorgeous" but no.
I know my parents only want to help and I love them for trying but they need to know that no matter how much I want to tell them everything I just cant. I love them so much but I cant tell them about my life and my problems, they have enough stuff to deal with.

Thanks though

[kickanxietysbutt]

Lozzbra374 - I used to hate when people older than me would say the types of things I am about to tell you, but even though I'm 30 years old, 15 didn't seem that long ago at all.  

The first thing I want to say is that you are beautiful and you ARE skinny!  I used to hold a lot of things in when it came to my parents as well, but (here's the part I used to hate hearing), as I got older, I learned my parents were my strongest support system.  They love you more than anyone in the world will ever love you, so talk to them.  Do they know you have an eating disorder?  This in itself could be leading to the anxiety you are experiencing.  Being 15 seemed rough at the time, but there are so many more important things in life to worry about than your apperance or "being normal".  What is normal anyway?  

You have already admitted in your post above that you have a problem.  Admitting this to others doesn't make you weak, it makes you strong for wanting to confront it and do something about it.  I'd recommend making an appointment with a therapist to address what is causing you to feel so unhappy.  Right now you should be having the time of your life (life only gets harder as you get older) and enjoying yourself.  Please consider opening up to your parents, a teacher, someone who can help you.  

[lozzbra374]

Its not him with the anxiety and stuff its me.. :/
I want to exercise but then I get to involved and make myself throw up and stuff so i cn be skinny. I hate everything. I want to be normal, but im not.

[AnthonyLiverpool]

Heloo raincover, You should try getting out of the house, long walks, take yogo class's, start swimming, exersise reduces stress wich will help alot, i hope your okay mate, but just try not to worry on it to much, worrying makes it worse, youve had a aniexety attack, lots of people have had them, doesnt mean that your not normal, hope your alright bud x

[lozzbra374]

I am going back to the doctor on Tuesday.

I cant do it anymore, im braking.. i cant cope.

[RainLover71]

Hi I remember we spoke before and it's been a while and things aren't that great.I am sorry that you had an severe anxiety attack but I'm glad you're ok.What's on your mind--you want to chat again.I am from Australia aswell.What meds were you given? and are they helping.Hope you are Ok.