feel like i'm going crazy! Help!

[tylrr_lloyd]

Hello, everyone
About.. 3 maybe 4 months ago I was diagnosed with GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) because I was getting attacks at work, where my heart felt like it was swelling and obstructing my breathing, I was dizzy and terrified.
These kept up, and I am now part-time at my job, when, out of the blue, on my day off, whilst relaxing I was flooded by panic, just, raw panic was coarsing through me, and I could not calm down. I felt like I was gonna lose control and just freak out. The only thing I was doing was noticing my eyes felt funny from the kitchen light. This was almost a week ago, since then I've not felt right, just very tensed up.
I've had the eye problems before, I think I may need glasses. But, the point of posting this was I was going out with my friends to see a movie tonight, the movie theatre was an hour's drive away and I was laughing and fine all the way, when out of the blue I was suddenly very withdrawn, very drained and reserved, I just could not talk or be 'jolly' with them, I'd try to talk and stop, because I had no energy, and, just... Could not do it. I had no panic, no feelings of anxiety until I started overthinking what was wrong.
The thing that happened before this occurred, was the light from my friend applying her makeup in the car mirror, was bothering my eyes, which brings me to my question:
My father has epilespy and some days he has symptoms similar to what I'm experiencing, but he has epilepsy from his childhood, not medically, and I had the funny feeling in my eyes and have gradually grown more anxious/worried about turning out like dad. And I only had this issue after I started having the more major panic attacks, is it possible my anxiety is causing these symptoms because I'm so petrified of the idea of having epilepsy, because I can notice sort of "hidden" anxiety/stress durring the issues, and I come out of them and experience them differently, I realize once they're over, than my father, so my question is, does anyone have some input on this? Its a lot of rambling I know, but, help please? I'm kind of scared

[hmf099]

I just want to add a quick example of something similar I and others have gone through. I used to have a fear of having a brain tumor. Because of this, everytime I got the slightest ache or tingling in my head or neck, I would fear the brain tumor which would send me into full blown panic and ironically, all the adrenaline from the panic would give me a worse headache!   You notice the slightest sight disruption, worry about epilepsy, and boom panic for you.   These episodes are very common with GAD. Hopefully knowing this is common helps ease your mind.

[hmf099]

I'm not going to get involved in the medication debate above because ONLY you and your dr can decide if medication is right for, but it should always be combined with therapy. Moving on, I strongly disagree with nursegirl's original statement about panic attacks. I do think you are expiriencing a sight phobia but you should see an eye dr to rule out any physical problems. Phobias can cause panic attacks when you are exposed to them. There are many reasons we have panic attacks and in therapy you can get to the root of some of your panic and that way tou will be able to diffuse it. Since tou already realize you have a fear of epilepsy (which I highly doubt you have), you and a therapist can start working on easing that fear. Sometimes those fearful thoughts are just the minds way of masking another stressor in our life, say money or marital problems. Once we learn how to deal with these stressors the anxiety and panic tend to become much less severe. There are some panic attacks however that will just appear out of nowhere for no rhyme or reason and in that case we can learn how to deal with panic attacks and diffuse them (which we should do anyway) and that can be done with relaxtion and breathing techniques as well as physical and thought replacement excersizes. Good nutrtion is important to our mental health and there are many vitamin supplements like B vitamins that can help but talk to your dr first. Until then it wouldn't hurt to take a multivitamin. You have many options for treating anxiety and your therapist and dr can help you find what's best for you. Please don't believe everything you read on here. While most of everything on here was helpful, some statements like taking medication is the lazy way and there's no easy answer to why we have panic attacks simply aren't true. There often is an answer to why we have them, and while medication without therapy is almost never recommended, medication is not lazy, although you do need to be active in your treatment and recovery. Writing on this site always helps my anxiety so keep it up! Remember all of this is opinion, expirience, and facts I've learned in MY recovery. Anxiety is different for everyone. Good luck!

[r9c]

Only a real psychologist can determined whether meds should be prescribed or not,in anxiety as i meant,if anxiety are severe,yes usually meds should be taken at the 1st place,then came theraphy,the thing is one usually present themself at Medical doctor,telling that u have anxiety, doc will really just prescribed u meds,just as easy as giving u painkillers,because theres nothing that they can do abt panics attack,they only can help you thrgh drugs,which works a lot on their medical problem patients,but cant blame the doctor,thats what they learned in their textbooks.This is what a psychologist told me before,panic attack is just a fear of fear,take time through CBT,step by step,it can be overcame,100% curable if its just Anxiety attacks.Also he made a record of his recovered patients,who overcame panic attack through CBT session,most of them never experienced panic attacks again,its simple,because they resolved the fear which is causing panic attack,but i know there are people who never suffered from inappopirate anxiety again when they tap off from drugs,like they say every individual is different.And wat nursegirl said is true enough too,we should never encouraged people to try meds,because the important thing is..u mus try everything that can be in the possibilities to ur recovery.

[tylrr_lloyd]

Wow, everyone, thank you for the support, I appreciate it. I actually am considering medicine at this point, and am going to make appointments to see a therapisty, if nothing else for a chance to vent. I am kind-of developing an idealism of anxiety being subconscious as well as conscious, whereas the phobia of light and fear of the ramifications stew subconsciously and then manifest in my conscious, to feed the anxiety monster?
I like looking at it that way.. But I thank you all, really :)

[younggrandmother]

It's anxiety, When I get a anxiety attacks, my eyes are the first thing that starts bothering me ,It almost fills like you cannot focus it is a horrible feeling.  

[nursegirl6572]

M4...I understand that that is your OPINION, but please be careful making statements such as "medications must be the last resort", because that simply isn't true...it's how YOU feel.  You need to state very clearly that this is your opinion.

With my background and history of watching medications help and heal people...it was my FIRST choice

Just please please try to refrain from making those statements...people in this forum are anxious enough...you better believe that quite a few people would possibly dump the notion of ever trying a med based on that kind of statement.  

[M4Y0U]

''The great medication debate will continue.''

Yeah i can recon that pills are the easy way. Lack of information to the general public about nutrition is so profitable to the pharmaceutical and medical industry. ''One symptom, one pill'' approach is a high profit business, $289 billion in annual sales worldwide.

People must know everything about the benefits of nutrition, let it be vitamins, natural supplements, hormones. We are all lacking those because of bad nutrition and processed food and a lack of organic and biologic products caused by the drastic lifestyle change we are suffering. The consequences of such lifestyle change are an augmentation in mental and physical illness and poor general health requiring profitable medical cares and profitable drugs. This doesn't cure the problem to the root it only mask the real problem.

We are what we eat.

I approve tho that someone suffering from anxiety or depression or whatever must use everything on the table. But in my humble opinion, drugs must remain the last resort choice OR the lazy way. I'm not saying all this like I'm perfect, i have been on Cymbalta for 1 month but as i was working more on proper nutrition and physical activity i realized that i didn't need the drug no more.

Anyway this is a debate the medical community have trouble digest.

I had to express this opinion since the debate started hehe.

[nursegirl6572]

r9c, while anxiety is not a "disease", it is a "disorder"....and medications have been known to be life-changing for people with anxiety.  Of course they are not for everyone, but people new to anxiety need to keep their options open and not discount any type of treatment.  I totally agree that just meds alone isn't the most optimal plan.  Meds help to control the symptomatology, while therapy gives us TOOLS on how to cope with anxiety and mechanisms to combat it when it shows up.

SummerRae...you're like me, you've had great success with these types of medications.  My first SSRI was Zoloft and I tell you, I feel it was a life saver for me.  I never imagined it was going to be as successful as it was.  And, while you're right that these meds do not have to be a "forever" thing, for a lot of people, it is adviseable.  Twice now, I have been lulled into a false sense of security.  I had felt perfect, totally anxiety-free for a long period of time, so I felt that I didn't need the meds anymore.  When really, it was BECAUSE of the meds that I was anxiety free.  Both times, my anxiety returned with a vengence within about 6 months or so.  Therefore, I think it is important for people to know that for some of us...it just makes more sense to resign ourselves to the fact that these meds are a lifetime need.  We frequently see posts about the same thing..a person comes off their med only to be back to square one after a few months.

The great medication debate will continue.  There are strong opinions about them on both sides of the fence.  While I am a supporter of medication for anxiety treatment, I also recognize that other people don't necessarily agree.  I think that the MOST important thing, however...is that a new anxiety sufferer doesn't rule out ANY method of treatment......and that they allow themselves to have their OWN experience without being influenced by other people's backgrounds with the meds (good or bad).  A person with anxiety very easily forms preconceived notions about things....and convincing themselves of something solely based on someone else's experience...that is too self-limiting and may cause that person to miss out on a great treatment!

[r9c]

The thing abt meds is its fine it taken under closed supervision of the doctors,and it works great with CBT too,while the meds help you to control ur anxiety symptoms,meanwhile a theraphy session will help to to change the ways of thinking etc..then overcame panic attacks.If one just pop up pills and thinking u are cured and done with anxiety,then it might not be,cause wat ur meds to is to help you escape from ur problems not overcomming them,take them away,they will be back.Meds works for curing a disease,but i dun think anxiety is a disease,thats y its totally 100% curable with the right treatment.

[SummerRae]

Just wanted to say, that I personally, was very against the medication route while I was going thru my stint of extreme anxiety. It came to a point where I felt I had no other option, and a doctor(psychiatrist) and my parents basically made me get on my SSRI.(zoloft)
Thank goodness.
Sometimes even just a low dose of an anti-depress/anti-anxiety medication will help you get out of a bad cycle of anxiety. These medications will NOT change your personality, or make you feel "weird". This coming from someone who knows and understands the fears of medications.
These types of meds are not a 'forever' thing either. Eventually when you get back on your feet and start to feel normal again, you can slowly taper off and be med free. I started my meds this past February and I am already strong enough to be off of them(with the help of a therapist as well) and am almost completely tapered from them.
There is hope! :) Good luck to you!

[nursegirl6572]

In my opinion, all of the eye symptoms and light issues have nothing to do with anything.  I just think it is something random you noticed, and because it was in close proximity to when you had a panic attack...you are attributing your panic to the eye symptoms.  Just as if someone had their first panic attack after getting a bad headache....the person will connect the two, when often times these things have nothing to do with the PA"s.  While frustrating, most times, there ISN'T an easy answer as to "why" we have panic attacks.  There may be some reason you seem to be experiencing photophobia (light sensitivity), and it wouldn't hurt to go to an eye doctor, just to rule out anything going on with your eyes, but again, it isn't related to your panic.

You need to get yourself to a psychiatrist, who can diagnose you and start formulating a .plan.  I am a BIG proponent of medications, like SSRI's for the treatment of panic attacks/anxiety.  I've had great success with a combination of meds and therapy, as have many other people.  Discuss the options with your doc.  A clarification, medications don't have to be reserved as a "last resort" like the poster above mentioned.  That is his opinion.  To medicate or not is a personal choice...and it would not be contraindicated in your situation.

Best of luck...let us know how you're feeling!!

[M4Y0U]

Hello there,

First of all if you were epileptic you would now it or have had seizures.

I think your problem is light phobia due to your fear of the heredity factors that might make you prone to develop epilepsy. There is some evidence of heredity with epilepsy, but it's minor.

Your phobia will sure trigger anxiety symptoms and what you need to do is overcome you fear. And since your were diagnosed with GAD it's not helping.

A good place to start would be to see a qualified psychotherapist.

One thing you must know is that this condition is very curable and the success rate with psychotherapy is very high.

Physical activity and healthy diet is also recommended. Natural anti-anxiety medications or Omega-3 and vitamin B complex is also to be considered since most of the people lack those crucial nutriments due to processed food and bad nutrition which can cause mood disorders and physical illness. ( There a movie called Food Matters if you are interested in learning that what we eat is what we are ). SuperfoodsRX nutrition supplements might be a good option if organic and biological eating habits are hard to do for you.

Drugs lie benzodiazepines and antidepressants like SSRI and SNRI should only be used in last resort only if all else fail.

Best regards,
M4