New Psychiatrist - I don't want to go back - Need support and feedback asap!

[annalawny]

Hi, all - I just tried posting this and got bounced out of my computer so if this is a repeat, ignore.  Otherwise:  I started seeing a new shrink today after 5 months of getting my meds from my primary care doc.  Previous to that, I saw another shrink at the clinic I go to, whom I came to like a lot, despite some 'issues' we had.  I was very afraid of taking meds then, and she took things slow.  Unfortuantely, she left abruptly after I had just started to like and trust her, and until now, I refused to consider going to someone new.  This new doc is actually the one who replaced her, but I wasn't ready to go to her then.  I understood new docs were being hired, and was hoping to get someone not unlike my old shrink, as I'm an older woman and wanted someone similar.  Instead, this new doc is only about a year post-fellowship, having just become board certified, last year, and she leaves me, frankly, cold.  She sat at her computer during our entire time (30 mins) and seemed to care little about hearing my responses to anything not on the screen.  

I told her I googled her, and liked her website, which offered a lot of forms of treatment and which promised various tests... She seemed taken aback, saying, "That's for my private practice!"  I told her I understood that I was at a clinic, and couldn't expect loads of expensive tests.  I really was, however, looking for more than a 'ok, here ya go, take these,' which is essentially what transpired.  

I want to go back to my old way of getting the meds from the primary care doc and waiting until new shrinks come, perhaps a doc or two who might be someone I feel more of a connection with - I felt NO connection to this person at all, although she wasn't 'rude.'  She is merely very, very young, and relatively inexperienced.  My old shrink worked for over 30 years and I felt she really knew her stuff.  

This one, for instance, told me to go up to 20 mg. of citalopram from the 10 I am now taking.  My old shrink, aware of my sensitivities to medicine and my ocd concerns and issues, went very slow, getting me acclimated to the meds and also to the process.  This one is like take it for 2 weeks, see how it goes.  She also said (when asked how to reach her) that I wouldn't be able to do so unless I was in dire straits, e.g. 'suicidal,' as they just can't handle the patient load for anything less.  I was like WTF?  She said you'd have to make an appointment and come in.  

Is this the Norm nowdays?  My old shrink had a similar, come to your next appointment policy.  Am I crazy to want to be followed when taking this stuff, not to mention the diazepam I'm still on?  I need feedback, support, your thoughts, on what to do next.  My gut tells me to keep searching for a new shrink, but in the meantime, I am following along here.  Also, if I try to go to someone new, I fear I'll be labelled a 'troublemaker.'  I suppose if I could just separate the experience out from emotion or a need for being actually followed, she can hand me the pills - she has an MD after her name.  However, despite that I have my own therapist, I think that one ought to expect more from their psychiatrist.  What do folks think?  Thanks in advance for your feedback - Anna

[annalawny]

Hi, guys - thanks for your input - hope more will weigh in because I'm sure this is an issue that affects many of us at one time or another - what to do when the person assigned as your shrink (clinic setting - private pts usually vote w/ their feet) is not someone you can connect with.  Nurse, I grant you, your therapist is the person you need to be able to connect with for talking - and as I've been with mine over 25 years, not a problem there.  What I'm talking about here is basically, the p-doc's demanor, and level of caring, which should be professional and kind, no matter whether they're just handing you pills or whether you're doing talking therapy.  My old p-doc and I had some issues, but I could take what she said to the bank - she knew her stuff and also, I felt she knew how to handle me and my needs.  Although we didn't sit and have lengthy therapy appointments, she seemed interested in why I was there.  In fact, I had to be encouraged to share some of my bizarre ocd experiences with her, as I was very embarrassed.  She said "But how can I help if I don't know what's going on?"  I tried giving the new p-doc similar info, and she was either staring at the computer or wherever - anywhere but connecting with me.  THAT's the problem, not a lack of understanding about the 'med check' thing - I get that.  I just think one's p-doc should take care - and the first one did.  This one, so far, acts like she couldn't  give a crap if it's not on her screen.  And when I told her i had a few more questions, did I have a few minutes, she just said "One."  Very cold.  Saw my primary care guy today and we agreed I'd go to 2 more appointments and see how things go.  I am now at 20 mg. Celexa, so I told him he'd hear from me if I have problems, as she doesn't seem to want to.  And if after that, I still feel the same way, I'll see about a change.  Thanks as always for your input, nurse - it's usually right on... and the rest of yall' too.  Anna

[nursegirl6572]

Hello there!  

To be honest, unfortunately, in my experience, a lot of psychiatrists are very much "all about business", with most appointments being very quick "med checks".  I never minded that too much, because the person I needed to have a good rapport with was my therapist, not the doctor.  

Typically, that is how the system works.  The doctors are primarily responsible for overseeing your medication regimen, whereas the therapist is the one to dig deep into all of the important exploring and talking.

That isn't to say you should just "settle", I'm just suggesting that perhaps your expectations about what a p-doc is about are a little "off", and don't feel badly about that...that is VERY common.

You can always try to seek out another doctor if that is a possibility.  You could also flat out verbalize to the doctor what your "needs" are, what you expect from her.  A lot of times, that's all it takes and things can drastically improve for the better.  Maybe try approaching her, you could say something like,"I know we're just getting to know one another, but I feel as though you are a bit cold and dismissive, and feel you are often preoccupied looking at your computer while I'm talking".  It can't hurt to try something like that.

Again, you could seek out a new doctor, if possible.  Remember it is important to be patient at first too.  You haven't really had too much exposure to this new doctor yet.  It may be a tad bit early to make a judgement call either way.

Good luck!

[goawayanxiety]

Wow! Sorry for your experience. It is so important to find someone you trust. I just started therapy and the first doc just didn't seem right for me so I requested a new one. She seems ok, and I will give her another chance. Your health and needs are important, find someone who will take care of you the way you need. Good luck!

[goawayanxiety]

Wow! Sorry for your experience. It is so important to find someone you trust. I just started therapy and the first doc just didn't seem right for me so I requested a new one. She seems ok, and I will give her another chance. Your health and needs are important, find someone who will take care of you the way you need. Good luck!

[theaddict]

to be honest with you, this sounds like a typical "doctor" that works in a clinic and are doing it out of good faith outside of their personal private practice. i know it sounds harsh, but that's just the harsh reality that i've come to know and have found out on my own. i know that treatment is very important to you right now - so is there any way you can seek another professional in your area? if money is an issue, let me know. that way maybe you can start to do a little more research when it comes to possibly another clinic in the area.. even if it's not right in the area, then we need to try and find you somewhere to go that's close enough.