Aa
6 year old daughter confesses everything
My wife and I have a 6 year old daughter and last week she began crying on the way to school and confessing to my wife everything under the sun, such as "the teacher told us to write our name then date but I wrote the date first, I was talking at lunch when I wasn't supposed to" and so on. She never gets in trouble at school, during the resent parent teacher conference her good behavior was highlighted as a strength. But everyday it is the same thing crying while going to school and confessing all night long. We have tried explaining to her that it is good to tell us about things that she thinks is bad but she needs to let stuff go and not linger on small infractions that no one would have known about if she didn't confess. I am in the military and currently deployed I am about half way through this 6 month rotation and believe that this could be a factor in her newly found guilt. What should we do?
OCD!! OCD comes in many ways and I'm telling you this is OCD. Please consider going to a psychiatrist and hearing them out. You are dealing with a mental illness that could and will destroy your child eventually and possibly your marriage. Good luck!
My sister used to do this when she was little. Turns out she suffers from clinical depression and a couple of other disorders. If we had known to get her psychiatric help when she was young, her life would have been a lot easier. She had trouble for years being untreated and people just telling her she took herself too seriously. She always wondered why life seemed so easy for everybody else. Now we know and she is doing so much better. She just turned 40 and has been under treatment since 2007.
smith020208 This is very important. you need to go to www.pandasnetwork.org There is a condition currently named PANS and PANDAS. It occurs when kids have a hidden infection. Strep, EBV, Lyme Disease etc. Sometimes infections are in their systems with no symptoms and interferes with the Basil Ganglia. This causes Sudden onset ODC, ODD ADHD Tics similar to tourettes etc. You need to go to one of the doctors listed on the doctors list on their website. If not diagnosed and treated your daughter is going to be miserable. Antibiotics will help If this is what this is psychologists and psych meds will not help. I literally pulled up this page by mistake and the word confessions caught my eye. This is how it was with my daughter at noon one day in 2015. yes it's that fast. also watch the trailer for the movie. my kid is not crazy its a documentary and i think it follows some severe cases so don't let it scare you off. my daughter is much more mild. plus all those kids have pandas which is from strep my daughter has Pans from Lyme. Please look into this. There is no other reason i know of why odd would come on so sudden. Also most doctors don't know about or believe in or understand this condition so you will want to make sure you go to someone who does or someone on the list. i even had to creat an account here to answer you.
For some reason I cant see if anyone else suggested this to you. My daughter was doing this too and it was out of nowhere and the first of many symptoms that appeared. Long story short - it sounds like OCD. Has she been sick lately? Please look into PANDAS as well.
My almost 8 year old daughter did this same thing in kindergarten.
Every morning, on our way to school, she would begin crying and telling her dad and I, all of the "bad" things she did.
At first, we were surprised, by this, and we'd talk to her and tell her, everything was going to be ok, that sometimes she's going to do things, that aren't always good, like listening to her teacher, talking to her friends, when she's not supposed to, but it's not always bad to do those things!
We told her we are very proud of her, we love her, and she can talk to us and tell us anything she wants.
This went on for another few weeks, then, one day, just stopped.
It had started towards the beginning of the school year, she had been in preschool but only a few hours, every other day, and going from being at home with mommy and her siblings almost everyday, to going to school full time, took a huge toll on her.
I decided to have her see a child therapist, which helped as well.
Some children don't do well with change, while others don't mind.
If this persists, maybe it would be a good idea to have your daughter see a therapist, once a week, for an hour. This will allow her to speak freely, get everything out, and do so, while playing games or playing with toy's with the therapist.
After a few sessions, the therapist will have a better idea, of what's going on, and where to go from there. If there's more to it and your daughter suffers from separation anxiety or some other disorder or issue, you and your wife will have already started the therapy, and your daughter will be getting the help she needs.
We, as parents, can play the guessing game, all day long, and think what if its this, or what if its that, but at the end of the day, its best to involve someone who has the expertise to help your daughter!
My middle daughter, who is 13 years old today, started to see a therapist at the age of 7.
Long story short, she suffered from severe separation anxiety, so much so, she would hit, throw things, have tantrums, be moody, wouldn't want to go to school, would cry and scream, on the way to school, and didn't like anyone around me.
She was in therapy for about 2 years, took a year off, went back for another year, and around 10 is when everything started to change.
She wasn't as moody, she'd go to school with no problems, she stopped hitting and throwing tantrums, and started making friends and going to their houses, and was doing a lot better!
Hopefully, you'll feel encouraged to seek therapy for your daughter and you and your wife, can find out the root of the problem and you all can work together. :)
Every morning, on our way to school, she would begin crying and telling her dad and I, all of the "bad" things she did.
At first, we were surprised, by this, and we'd talk to her and tell her, everything was going to be ok, that sometimes she's going to do things, that aren't always good, like listening to her teacher, talking to her friends, when she's not supposed to, but it's not always bad to do those things!
We told her we are very proud of her, we love her, and she can talk to us and tell us anything she wants.
This went on for another few weeks, then, one day, just stopped.
It had started towards the beginning of the school year, she had been in preschool but only a few hours, every other day, and going from being at home with mommy and her siblings almost everyday, to going to school full time, took a huge toll on her.
I decided to have her see a child therapist, which helped as well.
Some children don't do well with change, while others don't mind.
If this persists, maybe it would be a good idea to have your daughter see a therapist, once a week, for an hour. This will allow her to speak freely, get everything out, and do so, while playing games or playing with toy's with the therapist.
After a few sessions, the therapist will have a better idea, of what's going on, and where to go from there. If there's more to it and your daughter suffers from separation anxiety or some other disorder or issue, you and your wife will have already started the therapy, and your daughter will be getting the help she needs.
We, as parents, can play the guessing game, all day long, and think what if its this, or what if its that, but at the end of the day, its best to involve someone who has the expertise to help your daughter!
My middle daughter, who is 13 years old today, started to see a therapist at the age of 7.
Long story short, she suffered from severe separation anxiety, so much so, she would hit, throw things, have tantrums, be moody, wouldn't want to go to school, would cry and scream, on the way to school, and didn't like anyone around me.
She was in therapy for about 2 years, took a year off, went back for another year, and around 10 is when everything started to change.
She wasn't as moody, she'd go to school with no problems, she stopped hitting and throwing tantrums, and started making friends and going to their houses, and was doing a lot better!
Hopefully, you'll feel encouraged to seek therapy for your daughter and you and your wife, can find out the root of the problem and you all can work together. :)
2 Comments
This is great advice. I had a family member who went through the same thing with her daughter and it wasn't until another girl in the school went to her parent and confessed she was being sexually assaulted by another little girl in the school during bathroom breaks that my family members daughter confessed. Therapy is one of the best things we can do for our children because sometimes they are just too afraid to say what's really on their mind. Good luck to you all! I have a 9 year old and I don't send her to therapy, but we came up with an idea to make a list of adults that she feels she can share certain things with. She knows that it's going to come back to me, but she feels better letting another adult come to me instead of her sometimes. They are all her aunts so it works well.
Get this book. "Understanding the Highly Sensitive Child" (Amazon) Easy read 1 hour max to complete. I have all same issues with my 5 yr old son. This helped a ton. Plus I purchased "The Strong Sensitive Boy".
I am with the others who have replied suggesting OCD. I have mild OCD that I never even spoke of until my young daughter came to me concerned about recurrent thoughts of bad things happening if she doesn't do things a certain way. For me, I felt that as a child in that I would want to do things a certain number of times, or avoid a certain number, to ward off harm. The thoughts still pop into my head, but I guess it was mild enough that I taught myself to ignore it.
Ocd manifested itself in my son when he was 7 and began to hoard out of the blue. With a lot of patience, baby steps and cognitive behaviour therapy (not professional as they discouraged that at 7) he overcame it. In 8th grade during a stressful time, OCD re-emerged, he started the "confessional". I found this really tricky because you always want your child to talk to you about anything troublesome; yet to do so under these circumstances is to enable very unhealthy behaviour...a difficult scenario!
My son and I had very open conversations about all this. We agreed that he should tell me about how he was feeling rather than confessing in detail. When he felt the compulsion he would approach me and try his best not to spill the beans about what specifically he wanted confess in that moment. Rather, he would tell me how much anxiety he was feeling, why it was important he resist the compulsion, that nothing really bad was going to happen, etc. it took a lot of practice and patience once again, but eventually he got past it.
My son is now 18, my daughter 15, I regularly ask them how they're doing in terms of OCD. My son has not felt bothered by it since 8th grade. My daughter feels it during times of stress, such as starting high school last year. We all discuss how important it is not to "feed it" by giving in to whatever compulsion we feel. My husband was genuinely shocked by all of it, which I imagine is hard to understand if you've never experienced it personally. He was like: "Really? You think like that? I've never experienced anything like that..." And I found it odd that he never had any such thoughts pop into his mind.
My son's episodes were more extreme. My daughter and I seem to be a bit more chronic but mild.
I wish you well, it's not fun and it is a real worry to see so much anxiety in your child. Much patience, celebrating small successes, focusing on empowering your child, and lots of talk about identifying the thought processes and emotions your child is experiencing may help you as it has us.
Ocd manifested itself in my son when he was 7 and began to hoard out of the blue. With a lot of patience, baby steps and cognitive behaviour therapy (not professional as they discouraged that at 7) he overcame it. In 8th grade during a stressful time, OCD re-emerged, he started the "confessional". I found this really tricky because you always want your child to talk to you about anything troublesome; yet to do so under these circumstances is to enable very unhealthy behaviour...a difficult scenario!
My son and I had very open conversations about all this. We agreed that he should tell me about how he was feeling rather than confessing in detail. When he felt the compulsion he would approach me and try his best not to spill the beans about what specifically he wanted confess in that moment. Rather, he would tell me how much anxiety he was feeling, why it was important he resist the compulsion, that nothing really bad was going to happen, etc. it took a lot of practice and patience once again, but eventually he got past it.
My son is now 18, my daughter 15, I regularly ask them how they're doing in terms of OCD. My son has not felt bothered by it since 8th grade. My daughter feels it during times of stress, such as starting high school last year. We all discuss how important it is not to "feed it" by giving in to whatever compulsion we feel. My husband was genuinely shocked by all of it, which I imagine is hard to understand if you've never experienced it personally. He was like: "Really? You think like that? I've never experienced anything like that..." And I found it odd that he never had any such thoughts pop into his mind.
My son's episodes were more extreme. My daughter and I seem to be a bit more chronic but mild.
I wish you well, it's not fun and it is a real worry to see so much anxiety in your child. Much patience, celebrating small successes, focusing on empowering your child, and lots of talk about identifying the thought processes and emotions your child is experiencing may help you as it has us.
1 Comments
Test b12 as well...
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Child Behavior Community
Fearing autism, many parents aren't vaccinating their kids. Can doctors reverse this dangerous trend?
Is a gluten-free diet right for you?
We answer your top questions about the flu vaccine.
Learn which over-the-counter medicines are safe for you and your baby
Yummy eats that will keep your child healthy and happy
Healing home remedies for common ailments
