Behavior Concerns, excessive crying

[Vautorslo]

I have a five year old son that cries easily over everything. Since birth, he has always been a crier and cried all day, everyday during newborn/infancy period. However, he cries so easily. When it’s time to get in the car to go somewhere, he cries. When we come home, he cries. When I pick him up from school, he cries. When I stand in the kitchen while he’s eating, he cries or walks away then return to his food when I leave. When I read a story, he cries (sometimes). When I tell him to go get something, he cries. When he exits speech therapy (he has paraxial), he cries even after he has had a great session. He cries when he puts his clothes on…takes a bath, etc. I hope you get my point. He cries over anything. I’ve asked his pediatrician about this and she dismissed it as him being young and developing differently. This is unusual behavior and I need some help finding out what this is exactly. His preschool teacher mentioned that he does this during transition and it’s really getting on my nerves. As I type this to you, I’m crying because I need help figuring this out or finding a name for it so that I can get him the help he needs..or handle this better. He’s a smart, very respectful, doesn’t cause any problems, like to please everyone type of kid. I just can’t figure him out sometimes. Like, why he cries for seemingly no reason. This is so frustrating because I want to have a better relationship with him, but don’t know how. I hope you can help me.

Thank you in advance,

Brandi Smith

[Vautorslo]

Thank you jdtm for the book suggestion "Highly Sensitive Child."  I glanced through the book and it definitely describes my child and even went in depth about some sensitive children not being able to adapt or transition that easily with activities.  I'm looking forward to reading the entire book.  

Twin_mom, I do announce transitions to him but it works every now and then.  Thank you for advice though.

Margypops, it's not only a parent/child issue, but he does this with his teacher, speech therapist, other family members, strangers, anyone.  It's puzzling.  As for me standing in the kitchen, I'm always doing something i.e. preparing the other kids' food or washing dishes.  I've never just stood in the kitchen as I know this will make him uneasy.  I guess he just like things a certain way....routine.  I will try being more nonchalant as I haven't being consistent with this tactic.  I'm hoping that the less I react or rattle I appear, he won't cry so easily.  I'm hoping, I'm really hoping.

[margypops]

This sounds like a Parent/child interaction Issue,try letting him cry ,if it is for everything perhaps he has realised the crying is getting him a lot of attention, and possibly he is bored get him involved in sports and Games ask Dad to take over and play some guy games with him,Do you need to stand in the Kitchen while he is eating how will it affect you if you leave him to eat ,or get on with making your own meal, and then eat with him ,not stand there,Coulsd there possibly too much talking going on and not enough letting him be, try it and see if you are more Nonchalent if he crys l;ess.

[twin_mom]

I would recommend trying to help him with "transitions" like, we are leaving in 3 minutes.  It might work, it might not.  I would also look into some childrearing books on sensative children as the last person recommended.  If neither of these works talk to your school about having your son evaluated.  It should be a free service and they might be able to see if there is a more underlying problem.  Lastly, get a new peditrician.  I'm amazed at how unhelpful some peditricians can be.

twin_mom  

[jdtm]

Your son is not crying for any reason.  I wonder if he is suffering from some form of anxiety.  You might wish to google the term "childhood anxiety" or similar terms to see if any of the descriptions are similar to those of your son.

Often, depression and/or sensory issues are co-morbid with anxiety.  You might also wish to google the book title "the highly sensitive child" by Elaine N. Aron which can be found on-line, in bookstores or in your local library.  By googling the title, you should be able to find out information re this topic.  Hope these two suggestions help ...