The psychologist seems like a good idea. Does he have a lot of "sensory" issues - such as avoiding certain textures and being drawn to others? For example, does he frequently tear up tissues and paper or play a lot with sand, mud, dirt, etc? Some kids exhibit unusual behaviors associated with sensory issues, but this is usually evident beginning when they are young 2-3 and continuing into later years, as opposed to beginning at school age. That latter fact, makes it seem as though he is reacting to something stressful and disconcerting and he is exhibiting it in his behavior. Definitely seems wise to consult with a professional.
No, no other issues. My natural reactction was actually to just punish him for this, but my mom said that this may be phsycological. He is a happy kid with a pretty strong will that makes it hard to make him do somthing, but he does not have any issues in shcool. He does great academically and has had only one note send home during this whole school year for goofing off. This is what throws me off. Does he cut his close (at school) simply to be "cool"?
It is unlikely at his age that he would be cutting his clothes to be cool. Does he say what he likes about cuting his clothes?
Honestly I did not go as far as asking him how he feels about it. I was happy to pick up from his reaction to my "interrogation" that he is doing it himself verses someone is doing it to him. I actually want to go to school and ask why his teacher is not aware of the fact that child has an access to scissors and doing what he is doing without her even knowing it.
OK, just had a conversation with him and asked if he likes to cut fabric.... He said no, he just didn't like the clothes that he cut (!).
I don't buy it a 100% as he cut a couple of things that were his "favorite". Now what?
What didn't he like about them? How did he like the way they looked after he cut them? How about the things he cut that were his favorites? Does he know how you feel about him cutting his clothes? How does he feel when he's cutting them? What does he think you should do when he sees you cutting his clothes? let m e know what he says if you can get a conversation going with him. If he answers honestly and makes an effort to converse with you about it, it may shed light on what's going on. Try to get him talking about it. Be neutral curious and tell him that you will not get angry bout anything he says.
The things that you said here sound a lot like my baby sister she is 4 and has had a really hard upbringing, recently her mom even considered giving custody to me, but then changed her mind. I love my sister more than anything and know that she would be more stable and better attended to with me as well as get any medical attention that she needs, but since she is only currently with me for a while, is there anything that I can do for her, or tell her mom that would help. Basically she has cut her clothes a couple of times and the problem to me is that she has also gotten herself a few times, but she also has the sensory issues you were asking about.
I am having the same problem with my 6 year old. He is cutting up cloths and then the other other day he took a screwdriver and made x's in my van door. When ask why he said that it was not him and then when he know that I know he qas lying to me he told me that he did it. He will try to blame his brother or Sister first be for he will tell me that he did it. I am so lost and dont know what to do with him..... Can someone please help me with this one......
My child is 8 and he has the same issue. He cuts my things instead.. Leather things.. Such as the sofa... My bar stool. My ottoman an necklace case all leather. This is weird.
My 10 year old son also cuts things. Living room chairs and sofa, leather seats in the car, bedspread, lampshades. He will also shred his clothing if there is a hole or rip anywhere. In addition, he hides things everywhere (kind of like hoarding). Hides knives and scissors under his bed or the couch, hides food under his bed, hides the TV remote control. We are currently seeking psychological help. He is on Concerta 27 mg for his ADHD - switched from Adderall due to severe anxiety. Not sure what to do anymore. Very sad for my poor son.
My 8 year old deliberately cuts something every few months. Clothes, including her school uniform, bedding, curtains, tablecloths. She usually stares at me silently when I ask why or punish her. The only answer I ever got was when she was 5 years old... "Mommy, you know I have a scissor problem. " I am now making her save her pocket money to replace items. I also said that if she cuts anything else, I will cut her hair. I don't know ehat elae to do.
First, don't cut her hair. One reason is what would you do next when that doesn't work - and it won't.
Does she cut when she seems anxious or depressed?
Going on the assumption that this might be anger/anxiety related. That can be dealt with. Kids do need to be taught how to handle their anger. There are a couple sets of books aimed at this age group. One is, " How to Take the Grrrr Out of Anger" (Laugh And Learn). That and several more are found here - http://www.amazon.com/Take-Grrrr-Anger-Laugh-Learn/dp/1575421178/ref=pd_sim_b_7
Another good set is the," Don't Rant and Rave on Wednesdays!" The Children's Anger-Control Book. That and others in the set are found here - http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Rant-Rave-Wednesdays-Anger-Control/dp/0933849540/ref=pd_sim_b_1
The children's anti-stress book. You can read about it and other ones here http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Pop-Your-Cork-Mondays/dp/0933849184/ref=pd_sim_14_1?ie=UTF8&dpID=51V1ACTA3PL&dpSrc=sims&preST=_AC_UL160_SR109%2C160_&refRID=13M0V5FWQRZ4A341R48F
While I have not read this particular one. It has excellent reviews and is aimed at this age group.
In looking at the link I also noticed a series by Dawn Huebner. One title is "What to do when you dread your bed" and she also has "When you worry too much" The link is here - http://www.amazon.com/What-When-You-Dread-Your/dp/1433803186/ref=pd_sim_14_4?ie=UTF8&dpID=31sSJuWgysL&dpSrc=sims&preST=_AC_UL160_SR127%2C160_&refRID=15F1VHAKBVM4320SP1EC
What u have described fits my 11 yr old Son to a tee! Have him evaluated for AS HE or ADD
My son is 16 and has been doing this for at least 2 years. I thought maybe he had stopped but I found a huge stage of cut underwear. I guess he must cut underwear because I'm less likely to notice that it's gone. I thought it was for comfort - like maybe he hates the elastic. Then I thought maybe he was into something kinky as I know 16 is an age when they're starting to explore their sexuality. But, the cuts seem completely random (not like he's trying to make a thong, or some sort of kinky costume) He does seem to have some sensory issues - he doesn't want to cut his hair, and he doesn't like to shave, and he won't wear jeans or anything with stiff fabric (He mostly wears t-shirts and athletic pants) He also likes to get women's socks because they are softer. So I guess my question is, what kind of a doctor or therapist is best? I get confused by psychologist and psychiatrist and/or physical therapist? or some kind of behavioral doctor?
Let him know you aren't dumb and that obviously he is cutting up his clothes. Then, without shaming, gently ask him why he is doing it. Does it feel good? Does it help him get frustration out? If it is a coping mechanism for an emotional that he is struggling with, together you can find a heathy alternative that isn't so expensive! I would parent though, not go to a psychologist. Always parent first.