Placement for a violent 9 yr. old in Penna.

[Kate165]

9 yr. old boy. Has set at least 3 fires, cut up a turtle he found, tried to run over the family dog. Attacked his sisters, mother and father. Has a TSS in home and at school. TSS has seen first hand the rage over nothing. Demanding, throws anything he can get, punched holes in wall in his room. Threatened to break his Mother's back (she has already had back surgury that went wrong, from getting injured at work). He is seeing a psychiatrist, counselor, therapist. Was hospitalized several times, kept only a few days, he knows how to behave there, looks on it as fun, they do not keep him long enought to see the rages. Where if any, in Pennsylvania, could he be placed? this family gets little rest, as he gets up at night, is on several medications, but still gets up at night. Takes food out of the fridge, leaves what he doesn't eat out. Is now showing compulsive eating habits, family needs to hide things during the day. Has been sent home 2 times in the last month for beating up another child. He is fixated on this other boy. The last time, last week, the school did not call the parents to tell them what happened. He will make himself throw up on the bus, so that they will have to come get him. Now they don't, have refused, as they know it is a ploy. He is strong, solid for his age, smart, and so demanding. I have had him with me and seen him control his anger when I tell him I cannot buy him what he has demanded. This is a strong family, Mom and Dad, 2 sisters, have a nice home, Mom is not working now due to injury. Dad works full time, but still spends time with child. Teaches him how to repair his bike, 4 wheeler, but he then takes things apart. They had to put special locks on the garage doors, as he found the keys this summer, got into a battery and got burned on his forehead. He lies about everything. Tells TSS that father beats him. He attacked his other grandmother last year, knocking her to the floor. What has to happen? the house being burned down. Where can these parents get help before he injures someone seriously. Kay

[momagain59]

Wow, this must be a really hard spot to be in as his Grandma. I am sorry for your pain. I am so glad that their are so many people in his life that love and support him and his family. Has he always been this way? Does medication help him at all? Do they ever get a break from this child?

One of my sons has tried many different medications for ADHD. Most of them slow him down a little but increase his agression. His brother takes abilify due to his agression and moods. I asked his Dr. if we could try that with our youngest son. He started taking it last week and since then we slowly decreased his ADHD medication, now he is just on abilify and clonidine. Abilify has been a miracle medication for both of these children. He is doing much better without ADHD meds. I never would have believed it or agreed to it if I didn't witness the difference myself. Now I wonder if he has anxiety instead of ADHD. The wrong medication can make things alot worse than they are to begin with.

As a former foster parent, I can tell you that they won't be able to find many homes that will accept this child. He really needs to be placed in a residential facility for children until they can get his meds and his behavior under control. Discipline will not help him, it will just make things worse. This is not from his parents making mistakes. Maybe this child is mentally ill and he needs help. I bet he doesn't want to act this way either. Please convince them that they have to protect the rest of the family. It will be the hardest thing they have ever had to do for this child but it will be the best thing for everyone involved. The sooner he receives help, the less chance he will locked up as an adult. He may be able to return home when he is safe. Pretty soon he will be too big to control physically.

His Psychiatrist should be aware of mental health facilities in your area. They have to keep asking until they get help. He is a danger to others so he should qualify for long term treatment. I would contact the Police when he is not out of control to ask them for advice. Don't wait until he has committed a horrible crime and has to be locked up to protect society.

Most of all, if you believe in God, Pray for the whole family. A situation like this affects the whole family. I said a Prayer for your family, please keep us informed. I care.

[sarah071]

Is he in a behavior program at school? Is he on meds? Is there like a "behavior boot camp" he could go to for a few weeks? I'm so sorry that has to happen .. I work with emotionally disturber kids and it is so unfortunate to see them behave in such a manner... But it sounds like this boy is or soon will life threatening to the family and people around him I woud look into a very structured boot camp or put him on some meds that help with his aggression. God Bless

[babygirl6152]

If he is breaking the law by assaulting others- sounds to me like he is- will the sheriff not put him in juvenile detention til a judge can rule?

Sounds like for everyone's safety he needs to be restrained and at least kept home to keep society safe.

The eating habits sound odd and thoughtless but not a huge concern-

Is the dad strict? How strict? Is the son bigger than him? If my son tried any of these things- dad would have been down his throat in a heartbeat  and the child would have been begging to be taken to the sheriff's office.
If the dad can't handle him- sometimes they can't- tell CPS he can't handle him and they should know the agencies to connect you with.

sorry I don't know what TSS is