What is normal 5 year old sexual behavior

[momstar]

I have a 5 year old son who, numerous time has been blamed for playing "doctor".  He admits that it is usually his idea to play.  I have done hours of looking on the internet to see if this is "normal behavior".  I have talked to him several times to explain to him that it is not ok to touch other children in their privates that they are special to them.  He thinks it's funny.  I am so frustrated and humiliated!  I am worried to leave him at the babysitter because I am afraid he will try and play doctor or try and kiss the other children.  My child is not subjected to any inappropriate movies, tv shows etc.  I am quite conservative when it comes to sex and I have two other children that I did not have to deal with this behavior.  Please help me!!!  I do not know how to get him to understand that he needs to follow our rules and quit playing and touching inappropriately.  Do I need to get him in to see a child psychologist?  I am desperate for any information!!  I understand that it is "normal" or common but from what I have read the child should stop once you talk to them.  Not my son, he continues to make the same choices and continue to play in this manner.  Don't get me wrong it is not an everyday thing, but it has happened several times.

Thank you!
A very worried mother

[4Kids70]

Sexual exploration is very normal in children his age group. Some children more so than others. Some not at all. Though they don't typically think of it sexually. If that makes sense? It's a curiousity and not for stimulation so if you think of it as a non-sexual interest it will put this in perspective for you.

At age five, some children tend to be a bit defiant so his not following through once you spoke to him wouldn't be any different than if you asked him to stop another behavior. Are you taking note if his behavior is across the board or just specific to "playing doctor"?

I know it's hard but try not to be frustrated or humilated. I would simply keep letting him know that it is not acceptable and we are to keep our hands to ourselves. This is a good time to talk to him about "good and bad touches." I'd be careful not to make too big of a deal of it but monitor his environment more carefully. (He is getting the opportunity so take away until you can trust him.)

This a good time to develop some boundaries. Don't let him play alone privately with friends or siblings for awhile. Encourage shutting the bathroom door or bedroom door when changing or bathing. Start encouraging privacy. I would also let other parents know (situationally) that he's at the age where playing "doctor" is fascinating and keeping a close watch.  

I hope it makes you feel better but in time most children will develop modesty if you start encouraging those things. In all cases where I've spoken to family or friends about similiar issues, this fascination seems to go away with being a bit reserved (don't make a huge deal out of it) and monitoring them closely.

Peace to you,


P.S. As a side note - it is also very common for them to touch themselves for stimulation at this age as well but I WOULD be concerned and taking them to the pediatrician if they were playing "doctor" for stimulation.

[margypops]

Have you checked all avenues that it could be a learned behavior ,what age are your older children have you observed any of this in them ,at the sitters what is the age group, could there be any issues there, who is your son around alone  on a regular basis. If it continues it perhaps would be a good idea to seek some counseling help for him.