I agree and give it all the time it takes. Dont give in. You will want both of your children to eventually be able to have a bedtime story and a kiss goodnight. Do yourself a favor and not wait to train the baby.
If you ever watch SuperNanny, she has a good technique for getting toddlers to bed. In this situation, it sounds like your daughter might be having some issues with the new baby and not getting the attention she wants. If you get angry, she will get more upset and will not sleep. A technique we learned with our baby that might work with both of your children is this: Cuddle go through the bedtime routine, if she cries, let her cry for 5 minutes, then cuddle for 5 minutes. If she cries again, wait ten minutes, then cuddle for 5. Continue adding 5 minutes to the wait time until she is asleep. If she gets up before the specified time, I would quietly grab her hand and lead her to bed without talking. I know this can be stressful, and I know you are exhausted. Good luck and God bless.