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questions about 6 year old, child abuse, SPD
My son, I've posted on her multiple times. He is 6 and has sensory processing d/o. In the recent past his babysitter was turned into CPS and now has admitted to child abuse. So she has a child abuse without injury charge pending, she goes to court in late December. Anyway, yesterday at the new babysitter ,my son started to say the NEW babysitter did all these things like throw him on the floor, etc and that he was going to call the police on her. He was doing fairly well over there. He said this mroning she pulled on his ear, he denies it, but he is very sensitive to people touching him (sensory issues, etc). I am thinking about taking him to a therapist to talk to them about the old babysitter situation. Do you think this is a good idea.
She threw him on the floor when she got upset and thought he hurt her cat to make him feel like what it felt like to be thrown to the floor. Then she made him sit down and she sprayed him with silly string and then she made the 10 year old spank him. then she got her mom on speaker phone and had her yell at my son. She had him make up a story that she was walking with him and they fell and he laughed. He admitted to me that never happened and he did not laugh, he cried and that she told him to tell that story. I reviewed with him that when someone tells you not to tell mommy something, it's a red flag and you need to tell mommy.
He's upset with the current babysitter, he has to go back tomorrow. But sometimes lately, he's been upset with friends one day and back to friends the next. I don't know if this is a developmental stage or what.
Also, at school, they hav ea time to share and he doesn't like to share what we have done together, etc (museums, parks, etc)-- he says it is his secret. Is that unusual for a 6 year old? Is this part of the sensory stuff, also he's very funny about what he will eat at school. He will only eat certain things at school and certain things at home.
I'm just concerned, thanks for any help anyone can offer!
She threw him on the floor when she got upset and thought he hurt her cat to make him feel like what it felt like to be thrown to the floor. Then she made him sit down and she sprayed him with silly string and then she made the 10 year old spank him. then she got her mom on speaker phone and had her yell at my son. She had him make up a story that she was walking with him and they fell and he laughed. He admitted to me that never happened and he did not laugh, he cried and that she told him to tell that story. I reviewed with him that when someone tells you not to tell mommy something, it's a red flag and you need to tell mommy.
He's upset with the current babysitter, he has to go back tomorrow. But sometimes lately, he's been upset with friends one day and back to friends the next. I don't know if this is a developmental stage or what.
Also, at school, they hav ea time to share and he doesn't like to share what we have done together, etc (museums, parks, etc)-- he says it is his secret. Is that unusual for a 6 year old? Is this part of the sensory stuff, also he's very funny about what he will eat at school. He will only eat certain things at school and certain things at home.
I'm just concerned, thanks for any help anyone can offer!
Best Answer
Yes, nothing is easy. If I were to move,it would not be until this summer of 2011, I don't want to move preferably in the middle of the school year. It's so hard doing everything I Do. It seems as though nothing is SIMPLE.
Ya know what, after all you've been through------------ it might be a great idea. You're getting established in this school and you hate to rock that boat though. You are right------- it is hard no matter what. Grrr. Wish that weren't so! I feel for ya.
I don't get off until around 7:15pm, so all the afterschool programs close by then, it'sjust simpler to do the babysitter. On the upside, I get four days off versus 2. I work 12 hour shifts. It's hard any way you do it honestly. I'm thinking about moving closer to family. Even if they could just do some after school care, that would help immensely!
I have made an appt with a therapist about it to see what she thinks, she is also knowledgable in SPD. She told me this was not that unusual with children who have been through traumatic things, it's acting out. We go next Wednesday.
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Eating, sensory. In fact, we've been working with our occupational therapist for the past 6 weeks on eating issues. I tell my son what they are having ------------- they always have an entree as well as pizza. I think he ate pizza for a straight month every day. I didn't get upset about it because he was happy, getting into the program of eating at school, and wasn't hungry during the day. Then he tired of pizza. So now he will eat that once a week and must decide ahead of time if he wants the other entree or if we are packing. When we pack---------- it is always a ham/cheese sandwich. He'll eat fruit, so I sent that, then a cheese stick and a yogurt.
The lying is another story. Especially since he is repeating what happened to him with the last babysitter. I'd work with a therapist on this but you want to minimize the memory as well. You no longer speak of it in front of him. I also would work your schedule as best you can to minimize his time with sitters. I know you are a nurse and whatever flexibility you can claim now, I would.
This is really difficlt. A sensory kid processes things differently for starters and has trouble with regulation/modulation or in other words, their emotions. So he will have a harder time expressing how he feels about it. I think too--------- all that surrounded it---- that the babysitter got in trouble, that he had to talk to strange grown ups about it, that you are upset is all adding into it as well.
Anyway, I feel for you. I wish you had a family member around that could step in for a bit to help you out. What about after care at school rather than a private babysitter?