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Please Help
Please can someone help. My husband is very ill in hospital. He is 56 years old, had a major heart attack 7 years ago but recovered and has lived a normal life until recently. A few weeks ago, he developed an abscess on his belly (there was a spot and he picked it). His GP (doctor) didn't do a swab so they didn't really treat him with the correct antibiotics. He is also a Type II diabetic, food controlled.
The abscess was starting to heal up, but earlier this week he started feeling ill. Both myself and my son have had heavy colds recently and he thought he was coming down with the cold too.
On Thursday we was really ill, said he felt "wobbly" and he was a bad colour. I took him to hospital (not impressed with his general practitioner doctor - we are in the UK by the way) as I thought he might have the start of sepsis.
At the hospital his blood pressure was dangerously low - 60/45 with a pulse rate of 96. He was admitted straight away. Later in the evening they started to get the preliminary blood test results back and yes, he did have the start of sepsis but ontop of that, they suspected he'd had a silent heart attack.
The results of the second blood test confirmed that he had had a heart attack.
His daughter is a nursing sister at the hospital and what I've learned from her has terrified me.
Seemingly, the first heart attack he had damaged 54% of his heart - yes, it was a big one.
This one they estimate has damaged another 17% - 20% of his heart.
On top of that he has cardiac edema and they are treating him for that - although they were worried that the drugs they are using would drop his already low blood pressure (at the time 95/60 - they wanted it to be over 100 and steady) they decided to go for a calculated risk and give him the medication as his breathing even on oxygen is laboured.
As far as I can gather they may perform an angiogram on Monday and perhaps also an Angioplasty although his daughter let slip that they might be going for a bypass.
So far I have not spoken to his consultant as every time I go in, there seems to be some other family member there. Tonight his 90 year old father came in and much as I like the man, he was a pest - I was unable to even talk to my husband and eventually hubby told me to take his father home.
I am really scared for my husband and need to know if there is anyone on this forum who has been in a similar situation and survived or knows anyone who's survived and what the treatment was. Also what quality of life after the treatment.
Sorry to be so long-winded but really hope someone can at least give me some encouragement that all is not lost.
The abscess was starting to heal up, but earlier this week he started feeling ill. Both myself and my son have had heavy colds recently and he thought he was coming down with the cold too.
On Thursday we was really ill, said he felt "wobbly" and he was a bad colour. I took him to hospital (not impressed with his general practitioner doctor - we are in the UK by the way) as I thought he might have the start of sepsis.
At the hospital his blood pressure was dangerously low - 60/45 with a pulse rate of 96. He was admitted straight away. Later in the evening they started to get the preliminary blood test results back and yes, he did have the start of sepsis but ontop of that, they suspected he'd had a silent heart attack.
The results of the second blood test confirmed that he had had a heart attack.
His daughter is a nursing sister at the hospital and what I've learned from her has terrified me.
Seemingly, the first heart attack he had damaged 54% of his heart - yes, it was a big one.
This one they estimate has damaged another 17% - 20% of his heart.
On top of that he has cardiac edema and they are treating him for that - although they were worried that the drugs they are using would drop his already low blood pressure (at the time 95/60 - they wanted it to be over 100 and steady) they decided to go for a calculated risk and give him the medication as his breathing even on oxygen is laboured.
As far as I can gather they may perform an angiogram on Monday and perhaps also an Angioplasty although his daughter let slip that they might be going for a bypass.
So far I have not spoken to his consultant as every time I go in, there seems to be some other family member there. Tonight his 90 year old father came in and much as I like the man, he was a pest - I was unable to even talk to my husband and eventually hubby told me to take his father home.
I am really scared for my husband and need to know if there is anyone on this forum who has been in a similar situation and survived or knows anyone who's survived and what the treatment was. Also what quality of life after the treatment.
Sorry to be so long-winded but really hope someone can at least give me some encouragement that all is not lost.
Update on my hubby. The hospital have carried out an angiogram and found all three main arteries are more or less blocked. Today they carried out a stress test (drug induced) and said that only 30% of the heart muscle is working. They say he is not suitable for bypass surgery and is only borderline suitable for CRT. They are going to have another case conference this week and try and decide the best course of treatment but, basically, they are not holding out much hope that he will be any better than he is now. He is only 56 years old.
Things are not looking good at all :(
Things are not looking good at all :(
I am so sorry to hear that your hubby's condition seems so grave.
Don't lose hope, though. I'm 57 years old, my heart muscle was at 15%, two years ago, and I have a Defib/pacemaker installed, and I'm getting along fine.
I've already told you that I receive dialysis 6 days a week, and about my heart problems, but I just want to remind you that, I've been told I'm dying more times than I care to admit, and yet, here I am, alive, and feeling pretty well.
Maybe I'm just too stuborn to give up and die, but I feel great considering my prognosis. I clean my own house, I do the cooking for my husband and I, I do all shopping, etc....the list goes on and on, as a housewife would know, :), but I'm still kicking, is the point, so don't give up on your hubbby, he might surprise you.....also, don't let him lay down and give up....push him, make him get up and get moving. It sounds mean, but it will do him more good than babying him.
I hope the best for you and your hubby.
Don't lose hope, though. I'm 57 years old, my heart muscle was at 15%, two years ago, and I have a Defib/pacemaker installed, and I'm getting along fine.
I've already told you that I receive dialysis 6 days a week, and about my heart problems, but I just want to remind you that, I've been told I'm dying more times than I care to admit, and yet, here I am, alive, and feeling pretty well.
Maybe I'm just too stuborn to give up and die, but I feel great considering my prognosis. I clean my own house, I do the cooking for my husband and I, I do all shopping, etc....the list goes on and on, as a housewife would know, :), but I'm still kicking, is the point, so don't give up on your hubbby, he might surprise you.....also, don't let him lay down and give up....push him, make him get up and get moving. It sounds mean, but it will do him more good than babying him.
I hope the best for you and your hubby.
Thanks for your support and encouragement. Wow! 15%. Makes hubby's sound good!!!
Baby him? Not a chance LOL!!! He will need to be mobile (within his capabilities) as sitting around will do more harm than good. He has been walking around the ward, chatting with the nurses at their station etc. so that is always good. The docs were saying yesterday that when they do bypass surgery (although not an option in Graham's case) they get the patient out of bed as quickly as possible and moving around as that plays a major part in the success of the surgery. In other words, they get "tough love".
I think they are leaning towards the Defib/Pacemaker but we have very strict criteria in this country and my hubby is borderline on that criteria. This is a government quango that was set up (this quango is unelected and unwanted by everyone) and they decide who gets what. It is a cost cutting exercise and has resulted in the deaths of many people, particularly cancer victims who have been denied treatment/drugs to save money :(
We will have to see what the consultants decide after their second meeting, hopefully we'll know in the next few days or early next week.
It never rains but it pours. We just had to have our 14 year old cat, Pickles put to sleep :(
He was born into our family and my son picked him out. Ironically, Pickles (who was a white cat) was born deaf and my son is also deaf. Ian (my son) was with pickles when he was born and was with him today when he left this earth. Like most cats, Pickles had kidney failure. Ian was on dialysis for 7 years and has been transplanted for 2. He's really feeling it because he and Pickles were very close and he'd had him since he was a boy of 10 years old.
Baby him? Not a chance LOL!!! He will need to be mobile (within his capabilities) as sitting around will do more harm than good. He has been walking around the ward, chatting with the nurses at their station etc. so that is always good. The docs were saying yesterday that when they do bypass surgery (although not an option in Graham's case) they get the patient out of bed as quickly as possible and moving around as that plays a major part in the success of the surgery. In other words, they get "tough love".
I think they are leaning towards the Defib/Pacemaker but we have very strict criteria in this country and my hubby is borderline on that criteria. This is a government quango that was set up (this quango is unelected and unwanted by everyone) and they decide who gets what. It is a cost cutting exercise and has resulted in the deaths of many people, particularly cancer victims who have been denied treatment/drugs to save money :(
We will have to see what the consultants decide after their second meeting, hopefully we'll know in the next few days or early next week.
It never rains but it pours. We just had to have our 14 year old cat, Pickles put to sleep :(
He was born into our family and my son picked him out. Ironically, Pickles (who was a white cat) was born deaf and my son is also deaf. Ian (my son) was with pickles when he was born and was with him today when he left this earth. Like most cats, Pickles had kidney failure. Ian was on dialysis for 7 years and has been transplanted for 2. He's really feeling it because he and Pickles were very close and he'd had him since he was a boy of 10 years old.
Please never lost the hope .... my cardiologist says that the important point are not the numbers but how really do you feel. And for what you say he does not look too bad.
Let us wait to see the drs decisions and we will see later.
By the way, was the statin problem solved??
Jesus
Let us wait to see the drs decisions and we will see later.
By the way, was the statin problem solved??
Jesus
Ola Jesus.
The news gets worse. They are sending my husband home to die. They say his heart is too weak to withstand surgery. His best chance is with an ICD but he wouldn't survive the procedure. They are sending him home on medication and (if he's still alive) reassess him in 6 weeks time.
They made him walk up a short flight of stairs today to see if he could cope. It nearly killed him and he had to lie down for the rest of the day. We have stairs in our house. He won't cope with it.
I am also having problems with his family (his daughter is a nurse), particularly his son. His son wants him to come home. He doesn't want me to try and get a second opinion. I am angry at his son because he is giving up hope. I cannot do that.
There is a hospital in London which is the cardiac specialists and one of the main leaders in heart care in Europe. I want their surgeons to assess my husband. They can do that by looking at the medical reports - he wouldn't even have to go there at this stage.
I don't think my husband is getting the best care or treatment he could have - our hospital does not have a very good reputation, particularly for major surgery. The doctors can't seem to make up their minds on how to treat him.
My husband has 30% heart muscle function left. All his main arteries are blocked, along with the smaller ones. They can't do angioplasty. Seems they can''t do anything.
My husband is also a very determined and independent man. He is not the type to have to rely on others to take care of him. He has been told he will have to use a commode and a urine bottle instead of the toilet. He has been told the best he can expect is to have a bed bath instead of a shower or a bath.
Yet, through all this, no-one has spoken to me, so much so, my husband said tonight that he is going to refuse to see or speak to the consultant unless I am there.
Most of the information I am getting (and indeed my husband is getting) is coming secondhand via his daughter.
I am his wife and I am being left out in the cold.
I want what's best for my husband and I will fight to get it - no matter what they say. No doubt they will try and alienate me but they haven't really bothered with him for years. Just the occasional phonecall - when they can be bothered!
I don't think they have any real right to say and do what they are. At the end of the day, whatever happens is up to my husband - it is his life - and his body and I will stand by him no matter what he decides.
He wants to live. He wants to get well and I don't think that will happen while he is in that hospital but he is also not fit enough to travel a long journey to another hospital.
Please pray for us. We need your prayers.
Fiona
The news gets worse. They are sending my husband home to die. They say his heart is too weak to withstand surgery. His best chance is with an ICD but he wouldn't survive the procedure. They are sending him home on medication and (if he's still alive) reassess him in 6 weeks time.
They made him walk up a short flight of stairs today to see if he could cope. It nearly killed him and he had to lie down for the rest of the day. We have stairs in our house. He won't cope with it.
I am also having problems with his family (his daughter is a nurse), particularly his son. His son wants him to come home. He doesn't want me to try and get a second opinion. I am angry at his son because he is giving up hope. I cannot do that.
There is a hospital in London which is the cardiac specialists and one of the main leaders in heart care in Europe. I want their surgeons to assess my husband. They can do that by looking at the medical reports - he wouldn't even have to go there at this stage.
I don't think my husband is getting the best care or treatment he could have - our hospital does not have a very good reputation, particularly for major surgery. The doctors can't seem to make up their minds on how to treat him.
My husband has 30% heart muscle function left. All his main arteries are blocked, along with the smaller ones. They can't do angioplasty. Seems they can''t do anything.
My husband is also a very determined and independent man. He is not the type to have to rely on others to take care of him. He has been told he will have to use a commode and a urine bottle instead of the toilet. He has been told the best he can expect is to have a bed bath instead of a shower or a bath.
Yet, through all this, no-one has spoken to me, so much so, my husband said tonight that he is going to refuse to see or speak to the consultant unless I am there.
Most of the information I am getting (and indeed my husband is getting) is coming secondhand via his daughter.
I am his wife and I am being left out in the cold.
I want what's best for my husband and I will fight to get it - no matter what they say. No doubt they will try and alienate me but they haven't really bothered with him for years. Just the occasional phonecall - when they can be bothered!
I don't think they have any real right to say and do what they are. At the end of the day, whatever happens is up to my husband - it is his life - and his body and I will stand by him no matter what he decides.
He wants to live. He wants to get well and I don't think that will happen while he is in that hospital but he is also not fit enough to travel a long journey to another hospital.
Please pray for us. We need your prayers.
Fiona
To begin with, your husband needs to do what he can. The rule of thumb is, if he can do it without losing his ability to talk(from shortness of breath), then do it. Once he is having trouble getting enough air to carry on a conversation, then he needs to quit, rest, and then try again. It's a long process, but it does help to build the body back up from where he is at this point.
Now, for the worst part....if he smokes, he needs to quit, and he needs to be on a strict, low sodium diet, and if he has any extra weight on, he needs to lose it, using a diet of veggies, fruit, and lean meat and poultry. NO junk food. If he drinks alcohol, he needs to give it up.
So....it's diet, excercise, no smoking, no drinking.
He needs to live every single day, following this regimen, and hopefully it will be what helps the most.
I also take CoQ10, 100 mg daily and it helps to clear the arteries, making the blood flow more freely. Also, ask the doctors about giving your hubby Coreg 25 mg. 2 times a day. It helps the heart beat stronger, and move more blood with each beat, so it might help him. A daily aspirin helps clear the arteries, also. Another drug that seems to help, in my situation is, 30 mg Diltiazem, 2 times a day.
I know about the government run health care. They are trying to do it here in the States, but we(the people), voted in a republican Congress this session, and they put a halt to the Federally mandated health care, at least for the time being. Otherwise, the cutoff date for medical care would have been age 59, and that would have meant my days were definately numbered.
I assume the daughter is a "step" to you, right? Have your hubby sign a paper, giving you the power of attorney over his affairs, and that should take care of you being bypassed by his doctors. By law they have to consult you, instead of the kids.
I hope for the best for you and your hubby.....
Now, about Pickles.....I'm sorry to hear of your loss. I know a pet is hard to lose....almost like losing one of the kids. Pets just don't live long enough, unless you have a parrot, or some other type of bird, that lives to around 75 years. I recently had to have my ferret put to sleep, and it still hurts, everytime I look at a pic of him.....I loved that little guy.
You have my prayers, and I will ask for the prayer circle to remember you and your hubby, also.
Now, for the worst part....if he smokes, he needs to quit, and he needs to be on a strict, low sodium diet, and if he has any extra weight on, he needs to lose it, using a diet of veggies, fruit, and lean meat and poultry. NO junk food. If he drinks alcohol, he needs to give it up.
So....it's diet, excercise, no smoking, no drinking.
He needs to live every single day, following this regimen, and hopefully it will be what helps the most.
I also take CoQ10, 100 mg daily and it helps to clear the arteries, making the blood flow more freely. Also, ask the doctors about giving your hubby Coreg 25 mg. 2 times a day. It helps the heart beat stronger, and move more blood with each beat, so it might help him. A daily aspirin helps clear the arteries, also. Another drug that seems to help, in my situation is, 30 mg Diltiazem, 2 times a day.
I know about the government run health care. They are trying to do it here in the States, but we(the people), voted in a republican Congress this session, and they put a halt to the Federally mandated health care, at least for the time being. Otherwise, the cutoff date for medical care would have been age 59, and that would have meant my days were definately numbered.
I assume the daughter is a "step" to you, right? Have your hubby sign a paper, giving you the power of attorney over his affairs, and that should take care of you being bypassed by his doctors. By law they have to consult you, instead of the kids.
I hope for the best for you and your hubby.....
Now, about Pickles.....I'm sorry to hear of your loss. I know a pet is hard to lose....almost like losing one of the kids. Pets just don't live long enough, unless you have a parrot, or some other type of bird, that lives to around 75 years. I recently had to have my ferret put to sleep, and it still hurts, everytime I look at a pic of him.....I loved that little guy.
You have my prayers, and I will ask for the prayer circle to remember you and your hubby, also.
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