Need help

[yankeerose1970]

Or a kind some kind words...I'm a 43 year old woman, I've been married for 23 years, I have a 21 year old son and a 17 year old daughter. When I was 10 years old, my mother died from Crohn's disease. At the age of 22 I was diagnosed with Ulcerative colitis, subsequently diagnosed over the years with fibromyalgia, Raynaud's, Diverticular disease, IBS, arthritis...I've had multiple surgeries for various things. So I've been dealing with depression for many years starting with the death of my mother, being diagnosed with multiple health problems, an alcoholic father (who literally ignored me growing up), and being molested by my brother. So yeah, I'm a mess.

I've managed to deal with all this with no medication but have had therapy with a psychologist.....and the love and support of my husband.

There has been even more blows to my life recently where I had an emotional meltdown. At what point do you say enough is enough and opt for anti-depressants??? I really don't want to go on more medications than what I'm on now, but I'm tired of feeling empty inside. I feel like I'm living a lie. Faking happiness to keep others happy. What made you decide to go on anti-depressants???

[Anneinside]

I went to therapy first and then started on psychotrophic medications after a suicide attempt.

[anacyde]

My dad has had more brushes with death from his Chron's than we can count.  I'm so sorry for your loss and for all you've been through.  First, I would try counseling therapy, with someone who won't use medication as a first-line treatment.  A support group might even be a better idea.  I'm glad you're reaching out for some help.  You have a lot to deal with, but you sound like a person who has the will and the strength to manage, with the right tools.  Counseling or group therapy could provide those tools.  Be well.