Getting VERY depressed

[meganblair09]

I NEED some honest advice, because I feel myself getting more and more depressed as the months go by and I have nobody to turn to. I have been ttc since 2009 but officially, tracking my bbt, using opks and the whole deal since January 2010. It is now May, and Im still not pregnant. I KNOW im ovulating, I have the high cervix, increased mucus and positives OPKS. I have intercourse EVERYDAY during this timeframe, EVERY MONTH, and 2-3 times a week the rest of the month. We are doing everything right, whats wrong with me. I NEED someone to tell me why this is happening to me. I feel like I'm losing it, I'm crying a lot a lot, people around me are conceiving no problem, and here I am, every month, with another dissapointment.
Please any words of wisdom, any advice, any details on what is wrong with me. I have ovulation pain, I have painful menstrual cycles, my hormones seem to be in check based on bloodwork, I have my period every 27 days, everything seems normal, except a bit more pain than maybe some girls.
thanks for you help!

[LaPoo]

TTC can be stressful that does not help your chances of conceiving. Your body actually releases hormones that work to counteract your efforts due to stress levels. In addition, having sex everyday actually decreases your chances as well because the sperm count levels dimenishes. Every two or three days is actually better to perserve sperm count. It sounds like this method is not working..there are several other options to consider. You may want to talk to your doctor about incorporating stimulating meds into your protocol. Keep in mind, this could lead to multiples so take some time to think about it. Stay calm, remain focused. Your day is coming!! You're in my prayers. God Bless

[Dragon1973]

Oh Hun, I feel your pain and depression.  I went through my infertility for a while, and resorted to seeing a fertility specialist.  You mentioned you have painful periods and painful ovulation, which definitely tells me you may be suffering from ovarian cysts.  (Cysts can cause fertility problems.)  I have suffered with Ovarian cysts all my adult life.  When I get ultrasounds, the first thing doctors ask me is do you have painful periods and ovulation, and I laugh and say - Yes, I know, I have cysts.  But, alone that may not be the reason you are not conceiving.  Have you had any testing done for fertility?  Has your spouse been tested?  This in many cases is the reason why couples do not conceive.  Low sperm count, or low motility rates can greatly affect your chances of conception.  If you had blood work done, it sounds like someone is testing or checking your fertility.  There are other steps to be taken though, that I didn't know about until I saw my specialist.  Have you ever had an HSG test done (dye test to check your tubes and ovaries to make sure there are no blockages)?  While this test itself can be wrong nearly 50% of the time, and better if they perform it twice to ensure, it can explain why fertility is an issue.  You may be ovulating and having your periods quite normally, but if your tubes are blocked, there is just no way the sperm can get where they need to go to conceive.  When I read your post, I feel like I am reading one of my own journal entries.  Also, I forgot to mention, I was told by my fertility doctor that MANY MANY women who get the dye test (HSG) done conceive within the very next cycle because it makes you extremely fertile for about 3 months after the test.  I suppose it kind of cleans out any possible non permanent blockages.  And for me - IT DID work.  I conceived that very cycle after the 2nd HSG test I had done.  I was trying for 5 months before that without success.  Anyway, that is my advice and suggestions - I am not sure as I said what the extent of your testing has been, but I myself was completely unaware of the possibilities of infertility especially since I already had a baby before this time of trying without success.  I know all about your pain though, and I am convinced you have ovarian cysts, which is very common for women.  But as you mentioned, is painful both during ovulation and menstruation.  Please do send me a direct message if you can answer some of these questions, since I don't always follow responses posted back on the board.  I hope that I have given you some useful help/advice.
In addition to anything I have mentioned, please keep in mind, that while I or others may have extensive knowledge in many areas, you should always seek professional medical advice from your own physician, as it pertains to medical conditions or concerns.
Good luck, and if you have any other questions that I can help you with, please feel free to message me directly.

Sincerely,
Sandi (Dragon1973)
MedHelp Down syndrome Community Leader
& Ds Group Forum Founder/Moderator

[mlb1234]

Has your husband had a semen analysis?  Low/bad spermcounts are a common cause of infertility.  Other than that I would say go to a reproductive endocrinologist who will do the HSG and other tests to check you out.  Some possibilities are blocked tubes or endometriosis.

[mlb1234]

I would also recommend talking to the counselor at the REs clinic.  They can help you deal with the stress of infertility and trying to conceive.  Most people agree it is probably the most stressful thing they have ever been though. At least under a specialists care you will know you are headed in the right direction.

[10_07]

I know your pain and frustration all too well. My hubby and I have been trying for over 4 years now. We have 3 rounds of just clomid ttc naturally, 2 round of clomid with IUI and 2 rounds of clomid and follistim with IUI and nothing. Like you, my blood work is good, I ovulate fine but nothing. You at least have age on your side. I am 38 and that is against me. We are moving on to IVF, I think. My RE says that is a great way to increase our chances for unexplained infertility. It is so frustrating to see friends coworkers and even our 19 year old niece- who btw is lying about the circumstances of her pregnancy and who doesnt even want a child) get preggo. It just seems so unfair and it is depressing- especially when you are doing everything right! Don't give up, talk to a RE and see if there is anything they can help with!

[kris71]

You are feeling like many of us on this board that have been trying to conceive for years without success. The first thing you need is a game plan - it will make you feel better and like you're doing something instead of waiting every month to see if that is your month and living in 2 week increments...  First you should go see your OBGYN and get some preliminary testing done. If you're under 35 they usually say try conceiving for a year and if nothing, then go see your OB. If you're over 35, you should go see your OBGYN after 6 mos of trying to conceive but even if you're under those timelines - i would still see your OBGYN just to get the ball rolling. WHen you see your OB, you will get some preliminary testing done. The first test they do, is on your husband to see if sperm is ok (it's also the easiest test to do). They may do an ultrasound and some blood tests on you as well. if all is well and still not pregnant, they will do an HSG - where they run dye through your uterus and fallopian tubes to see if they are clear. if you're still not pregnant after that, your dr may refer you to an RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist) or some will first just give clomid to help better your chances. it's a time consuming process but being proactive will help. Keep pushing until you get answers. You also may want to call your insurance and see what infertility coverage you may have, in the event that you may need to do IUI or IVF. This board helps because it's a great support group and you feel like you're not alone. Hang in there and good luck!

[ladybug354]

A game plan is a good idea. That way you feel like your in control of something. When your ttc its an "out of control" feeling b/c you cant "make" it happen.
I feel your stress. We may all have a little differant medical condition but one thing unites us here as women and that is we all have the desire for a pregnancy.
A fertility specialsist will help you.........I just resently gave in to my fear of going to see one b/c I was sooooo afraid they might say I was over 35 and hopeless due to my prior surgery a few years ago but that was not the case. They are very understanding and they help you. They cant promise sucsess but they will research and help you with a game plan thats best for you.
Its helped me to relax and a just work towards the simple steps my doctor has layed out for me.
Best wishes for your hearts desire! :-)