help please

[sfaos]

I have been married for almost 2 months now. I faced a few problems during intercourse initially since i was a virgin when i got married. We were able to do it after like 10 days of trying ( and we tried everyday, maybe even a couple of times in one day ) . I bled once after 6 or 7 days and i thought that was it but that bleeding was very little and i bled again after 10 days of trying intercourse and this time it was right because i bled more than the last time. After that everythign was normal till today when my husband showed me the condom and told me that he has seen the blood on it many times before but he ignored it,  this time it was more than before so he had to tell me but i never feel any bleed or anything, its just on the condom after having intercourse there is this small amount of blood. What could that be? Can anyone please help me this regard. I would be very grateful.

[mommyohs]

You may be having residual bleeding from the rupture of you hymen or some other physical abnormality (some women have more than one or a particularly tough one) but you should NEVER ignore non -menstrual cycle bleeding. Get thyself to the OB/GYN ASAP and have an exam to determine your probs. NO woman of ANY age is immune to gynecological problems and you should be having a regular annual exam and pap smear if you are not, especially since you are now sexually active. Gynecological problems are not hard to detect early and usually easily fixed but if you don't go ask the gynecologist then you can be seriously ill with no symptoms (not saying that is your case so don't panic).
Your husband needs to learn to open his mouth and discuss these things with you too. I have been married nearly 22 years and you have to educate your man to watch out for your health as you do his. INFORM YOURSELF about your body without fail. Any hospital has a library available to the public or the public library or any doctor's office has free literature. Many an uniformed person has died of ignorance of their own body's workings. It isn't gross, it is imperitive. What will you do if you are uninformed and have a child that is dependent upon you for their every need including being their only or primary health guardian? Learn NOW. Knowledge will ease your concerns.

[Roki000]

Congratulations on your marriage!  :)   So, you say you've been "trying" to have intercourse...  Could the blood be from too much friction when your husband's trying to enter you?  If you guys are trying to force entry then that might cause small tears in your skin.  Perhaps you could use a little lube (get one without sugar/glucose in it) or get some very lubricated condoms?  Sometimes if you have intercourse just before you start your period, that can cause bleeding as well, which is natural since you're about to begin your period anyway.  Keeping good track of your cycle will help you determine if this may be the case.  Patience, until you guys figure out how you fit best together, is vital for both of you.  Absolutely go to an ob/gyn about this too.  Getting a checkup and full exam is very important for every woman's health, especially if you may be planning on having a baby one day.  You might also ask your dr. for suggestions on appropriate lubrications, more comfortable positions (since you're new at this) and relaxation techniques you might want to try as well.  Best of luck!

[sfaos]

Thank you so much for the quick reply. I think we do try to force the entry sometimes but we use lubricants when we see that its not happening. Also, when we use condoms, after a while it drys out and we have to lubricate it again and my husband tells me that it shouldnt be drying out like that. Maybe that causes a friction and skin t rupture. Also, i think i get spasm as soon as  we try to enter it. Is it normal for a woman to get it ? Also is it normal for a woman not to get wet during the sex ?
   Thank you again for help.

[remar]

I agree with the above posts. It might be time to see your Dr to find out what's going on.
You asked if it's normal for a woman to not get wet during sex. The answer is yes and no. If you and your husband are going straight to intercourse with no foreplay then you will probably be dry. If you take plenty of time with each other before intercourse then you should be much more wet.
Since you were a virgin when you got married I would recommend getting some books about sex for you and your husband to read. There's so much more to making love than just intercourse. I hope this helps you some. Remar