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Anal Fingering
Hi docs,
I am going crazy here. I made a horrible choice about three months ago. I had met up with a guy I didn't know very well and cheated on my partner. We were just masturbating each other at first, but then he began fingering me. I yelled at him and he pulled out after going in for about 20 seconds.
Now, I am so stricken with guilt. I want to cry. I am so worried he used some precum when fingering me, but I have no idea. I know when we were masturbating I never saw him precum.
A week after the encounter, I had a hemorrhoid, something I've never had before. It was very itchy. I had been feeling constipated before, but I immediately tied it to the meeting.
Three weeks later, I got sick. My nose was running nonstop and I could barely breathe. About three days into my sickness, I had diarrhea for two days. Note that the girl next to me at work was sick with a cold. I'm not sure if she had stomach issues. At the same time, I got a few itchy patches on my skin for a few weeks. I have very sensitive skin, but I keep thinking "why was this all tied together around the same time?"
Four weeks after I was sick, my partner had the same nasal cold. He also had diarrhea after a dinner, but it only lasted for the night. Then, he got a strange rash (like red lines, no bumps or itchiness) on his legs that eventually went away.
I am so worried and I want to break down. I've convinced myself I got HIV from this man and passed it on to my partner. I don't know what to do. I'm scared to get tested because I don't know what a positive test would mean for us. I keep convincing myself the situation was extremely risky even though I'm not sure he used his precum. I know the best thing is to come clean to my partner. Do you think this was a high risk encounter?
Please help!!
I am going crazy here. I made a horrible choice about three months ago. I had met up with a guy I didn't know very well and cheated on my partner. We were just masturbating each other at first, but then he began fingering me. I yelled at him and he pulled out after going in for about 20 seconds.
Now, I am so stricken with guilt. I want to cry. I am so worried he used some precum when fingering me, but I have no idea. I know when we were masturbating I never saw him precum.
A week after the encounter, I had a hemorrhoid, something I've never had before. It was very itchy. I had been feeling constipated before, but I immediately tied it to the meeting.
Three weeks later, I got sick. My nose was running nonstop and I could barely breathe. About three days into my sickness, I had diarrhea for two days. Note that the girl next to me at work was sick with a cold. I'm not sure if she had stomach issues. At the same time, I got a few itchy patches on my skin for a few weeks. I have very sensitive skin, but I keep thinking "why was this all tied together around the same time?"
Four weeks after I was sick, my partner had the same nasal cold. He also had diarrhea after a dinner, but it only lasted for the night. Then, he got a strange rash (like red lines, no bumps or itchiness) on his legs that eventually went away.
I am so worried and I want to break down. I've convinced myself I got HIV from this man and passed it on to my partner. I don't know what to do. I'm scared to get tested because I don't know what a positive test would mean for us. I keep convincing myself the situation was extremely risky even though I'm not sure he used his precum. I know the best thing is to come clean to my partner. Do you think this was a high risk encounter?
Please help!!
Searching many websites nonstop is not going to help with your anxiety--it will just make it worse.What you need to do is accept real facts and what you engaged in is not a mode of HIV transmission.
Thanks Teak. I am driving myself crazy and this helps a little. I made a calendar of every symptom each of us has had since then and have been googling nonstop. I think I need to see a therapist.
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