Hi everyone .. I want to thank you all for your help.
I never " hook up" with anyone, ever. I want to be in " love " I always say, my friends laugh at this and go and sleep with a new guy every night ( total personal preference nothing bad against them !) Well, one night I got so drunk, so so drunk.. this boy walked me home , nice right? Well when we got to my apartment he came in, I practically passed out on the couch and he bagan performing oral sex on me ( first time I've ever had this done to me ) and fingering meI was in and out of conciousness but I remember he then tried to have sex with me, the tip of his penis only touched my vagina for maybe 10 -20 seconds no insertion or friction because I began to sober up a little at this point and pushed him off me screaming how I am a virgin what is he doing he apologized and left. The next morning I woke up with a little soreness in my vagina .. I attributed this to being fingered. Later that night though I started feeling very itchy down below. The next day I was still itchy and had some soreness in my legs from what I can recall. I then had a bunch of tiny red bumps on my buttocks and felt somewhat fluish I don't know if this is from the actual hsv or from thinking I had hsv that was making me feel sick. I was freaking out. I assumed I had contracted HSV1 from the oral sex, i was a ball of emotions but could kind of handle it somewhat because of the prevalance of hsv1 ( good chance future partners would have antibodies) and the non severity of the outbreaks. I never received a culture because I was unfortunatley to scared to do so I could barley even move. At 9 weeks I went to take a blood test, my doctor ordered the test and I soon realized that he had only order a herpes 2 test ( i asked later he said they dont test for hsv1 too common , how frustrating! ) My hsv2 test came back negative, however now my head is spinning. I keep thinking that maybe the penis vagina contact resulted in hsv2 and I am literally in a state of such depression I don't know what to do. I am away at school and I can't stop crying for more than an hour, I start spontaneously crying in class. I have never even had insertive sex yet. I have never even done anything with anyone yet. I feel like my life is over and I know everyone says it's not and I'll be fine it gets better with time but I really want to die. I was wondering what is the accuracy of a 9 week test ( I know it's too soon I didn't realize until afterwards) and based on my situation do you think hsv2 is likely. I had shaved that day and I know that makes it more likely to transmit :( Please help .. I am so lost .. I can't even breathe