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Protected Vaginal and Oral w/ Stripper. Crippling Anxiety. Please Help.
Hello,
It took a lot for me to get myself to ask these questions and just want to say thank you in advance for your time. 11 days ago I had protected oral and vaginal sex with a stripper. Oral was less than 30 seconds and vaginal less than 5 minutes. Condom stayed on but appeared to have slipped up the shaft a bit as I did not pull out and went semi-limp. Condom appeared to cover the head of the penis when I took it off though. I texted the stripper the next day and asked if she had any STDs. She said no and that she gets tested every 3 months and re-assured me that she was clean as she has a boyfriend and 3 kids at home. I just find it hard to believe as she was so willing to do oral and vaginal sex and probably does it all of the time so who knows if she is telling the truth (she did provide the condom and didn’t touch anything until that was on). She did say she normally doesn’t do sex and just blow jobs, whatever that means. I am still baffled at how fast everything happened when it was supposed to just be a private dance.
This is the first time I have ever done anything like this and immediately went to Google because of how disappointed in myself I am. 42 hours in I started a PEP regimen and the side effects are horrible. I am thinking about stopping but I also feeling like I need to suck it up and finish the course to be sure since I am already 11 days in. At 4.5 days I did a 10 panel STD test and everything was negative including HSV1 and HSV2. I also went in to the walk in on day 9 for a UTI check because I have a light burning sensation on the tip of penis and I urinate frequently with pee that just continues to dribble out. The urinalysis dip test was negative for nitrites and leukocytes which I am assuming would be positive if I had a bacterial STI? I am thinking my symptoms could be from anxiety and side effects of the PEP as it does not burn when I urinate and there is no discharge. I also had the burning sensation in the top of my penis right away the day after the encounter. I have now had unprotected sex with my partner the night of day 9 after the negative urinalyses and am just worried that I could spread Gonorrhea or Chlamydia to her.
My questions are:
1. Should I test again for Gonorrhea and Chlamydia or are the tests I have already done conclusive?
2. Should I end my PEP regimen or would you see it through since I am halfway through? Did labs yesterday and kidneys and liver are fine but I have elevated blood sugar because of the PEP.
3. I have no signs or Herpes or anything but my question is does PEP affect the timeframes of no sores within 21 days and then no need to test with no visible sores? Or does PEP suppress Herpes symptoms and I need to wait and see what happens after PEP? I read several posts that after 10 days of no symptoms then should be good.
4. Does PEP affect Herpes testing and any antibodies that are created? If I test at 6 weeks will that be ok with PEP or no?
5. Would you continue with unprotected sex with my partner if you were me? Just want to make sure I don’t pass anything along.
Any help with the above questions would mean a lot to me. Really messed up my holiday season and honestly have never been this depressed and anxious. Hopefully everything works out. Thank you!
It took a lot for me to get myself to ask these questions and just want to say thank you in advance for your time. 11 days ago I had protected oral and vaginal sex with a stripper. Oral was less than 30 seconds and vaginal less than 5 minutes. Condom stayed on but appeared to have slipped up the shaft a bit as I did not pull out and went semi-limp. Condom appeared to cover the head of the penis when I took it off though. I texted the stripper the next day and asked if she had any STDs. She said no and that she gets tested every 3 months and re-assured me that she was clean as she has a boyfriend and 3 kids at home. I just find it hard to believe as she was so willing to do oral and vaginal sex and probably does it all of the time so who knows if she is telling the truth (she did provide the condom and didn’t touch anything until that was on). She did say she normally doesn’t do sex and just blow jobs, whatever that means. I am still baffled at how fast everything happened when it was supposed to just be a private dance.
This is the first time I have ever done anything like this and immediately went to Google because of how disappointed in myself I am. 42 hours in I started a PEP regimen and the side effects are horrible. I am thinking about stopping but I also feeling like I need to suck it up and finish the course to be sure since I am already 11 days in. At 4.5 days I did a 10 panel STD test and everything was negative including HSV1 and HSV2. I also went in to the walk in on day 9 for a UTI check because I have a light burning sensation on the tip of penis and I urinate frequently with pee that just continues to dribble out. The urinalysis dip test was negative for nitrites and leukocytes which I am assuming would be positive if I had a bacterial STI? I am thinking my symptoms could be from anxiety and side effects of the PEP as it does not burn when I urinate and there is no discharge. I also had the burning sensation in the top of my penis right away the day after the encounter. I have now had unprotected sex with my partner the night of day 9 after the negative urinalyses and am just worried that I could spread Gonorrhea or Chlamydia to her.
My questions are:
1. Should I test again for Gonorrhea and Chlamydia or are the tests I have already done conclusive?
2. Should I end my PEP regimen or would you see it through since I am halfway through? Did labs yesterday and kidneys and liver are fine but I have elevated blood sugar because of the PEP.
3. I have no signs or Herpes or anything but my question is does PEP affect the timeframes of no sores within 21 days and then no need to test with no visible sores? Or does PEP suppress Herpes symptoms and I need to wait and see what happens after PEP? I read several posts that after 10 days of no symptoms then should be good.
4. Does PEP affect Herpes testing and any antibodies that are created? If I test at 6 weeks will that be ok with PEP or no?
5. Would you continue with unprotected sex with my partner if you were me? Just want to make sure I don’t pass anything along.
Any help with the above questions would mean a lot to me. Really messed up my holiday season and honestly have never been this depressed and anxious. Hopefully everything works out. Thank you!
COMMUNITY LEADER
Who put you on PEP after having protected oral and vaginal sex? That is absolutely unnecessary.
So long as the head of your penis was covered, there was no risk for gonorrhea, chlamydia, HIV, hep B, NGU, mycoplasma, trich, etc.
There is a slight risk for herpes, syphilis and HPV when using condoms, but that's because condoms don't cover the entire area.
1. Should I test again for Gonorrhea and Chlamydia or are the tests I have already done conclusive?
You had no risk for these so long as the head of your penis was covered. I see no reason to test again.
2. Should I end my PEP regimen or would you see it through since I am halfway through? Did labs yesterday and kidneys and liver are fine but I have elevated blood sugar because of the PEP.
I can not tell you to stop meds you are currently taking, but I don't know why you started them in the first place.
3. I have no signs or Herpes or anything but my question is does PEP affect the timeframes of no sores within 21 days and then no need to test with no visible sores? Or does PEP suppress Herpes symptoms and I need to wait and see what happens after PEP? I read several posts that after 10 days of no symptoms then should be good.
PEP doesn't affect herpes testing, or herpes symptoms, or anything with herpes. No symptoms within 21 days is a great sign.
4. Does PEP affect Herpes testing and any antibodies that are created? If I test at 6 weeks will that be ok with PEP or no?
Testing at 6 weeks is fine. See above.
5. Would you continue with unprotected sex with my partner if you were me? Just want to make sure I don’t pass anything along.
I wouldn't have any issues with having unprotected sex with my partner if I were you. I would, however, talk to my doctor about anxiety. I might also reconsider my healthcare provider if they were the one who put me on PEP for a protected encounter. I would also learn from this because clearly my anxiety can not handle going outside my relationship. (No judgement at all, just compassion.)
So long as the head of your penis was covered, there was no risk for gonorrhea, chlamydia, HIV, hep B, NGU, mycoplasma, trich, etc.
There is a slight risk for herpes, syphilis and HPV when using condoms, but that's because condoms don't cover the entire area.
1. Should I test again for Gonorrhea and Chlamydia or are the tests I have already done conclusive?
You had no risk for these so long as the head of your penis was covered. I see no reason to test again.
2. Should I end my PEP regimen or would you see it through since I am halfway through? Did labs yesterday and kidneys and liver are fine but I have elevated blood sugar because of the PEP.
I can not tell you to stop meds you are currently taking, but I don't know why you started them in the first place.
3. I have no signs or Herpes or anything but my question is does PEP affect the timeframes of no sores within 21 days and then no need to test with no visible sores? Or does PEP suppress Herpes symptoms and I need to wait and see what happens after PEP? I read several posts that after 10 days of no symptoms then should be good.
PEP doesn't affect herpes testing, or herpes symptoms, or anything with herpes. No symptoms within 21 days is a great sign.
4. Does PEP affect Herpes testing and any antibodies that are created? If I test at 6 weeks will that be ok with PEP or no?
Testing at 6 weeks is fine. See above.
5. Would you continue with unprotected sex with my partner if you were me? Just want to make sure I don’t pass anything along.
I wouldn't have any issues with having unprotected sex with my partner if I were you. I would, however, talk to my doctor about anxiety. I might also reconsider my healthcare provider if they were the one who put me on PEP for a protected encounter. I would also learn from this because clearly my anxiety can not handle going outside my relationship. (No judgement at all, just compassion.)
9 Comments
Thank you for your quick response. I was surprised that they prescribed me PEP and I think that just fueled my anxiety more. Just torn whether I should stop or just finish the course.
So beings PEP is an antiviral it doesn’t delay Herpes seroconversion or systems or testing or anything?
So beings PEP is an antiviral it doesn’t delay Herpes seroconversion or systems or testing or anything?
There is NO medical reason for you to be taking PEP. The only sexual risk for HIV is unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. You had no risk for HIV, and PEP isn't preventing a disease you were never exposed to.
PEP medications are antiretroviral drugs. Herpes meds are antiviral drugs - they sound similar, but are very different. PEP meds don't affect herpes testing, or herpes seroconversion or herpes symptoms. Conversely, herpes meds don't affect HIV testing, symptoms, etc.
As Curfew said, there is no medical reason for you to be taking PEP. I don't know why they prescribed it to you, unless they heard "stripper" and said "omg he had sex with a stripper", which is also stupid, because even most strippers don't have HIV. Most people don't have HIV, assuming you aren't in certain areas of Africa or something.
As Curfew said, there is no medical reason for you to be taking PEP. I don't know why they prescribed it to you, unless they heard "stripper" and said "omg he had sex with a stripper", which is also stupid, because even most strippers don't have HIV. Most people don't have HIV, assuming you aren't in certain areas of Africa or something.
Thank you for the quick responses. I think I am going to stop taking PEP.
Now in regards to Herpes, what are my chances that I am good to go with no symptoms after 11 days? Our encounter was not very rough as the position I was in was sitting upright so my pubic area was not thrusted up in a good position to get a lot of contact. It was dark so I was not able to see if the stripper had any sores or anything. I assume if she was having an outbreak and sex is “not something she normally does” then she obviously wouldn’t have had intercourse then. Does that sound like a reasonable assumption? Just talking with you 2 is already making my anxiety subside. Just really started off on a bad foot when the doctor I saw said I need to immediately get on PEP. That was really hard to hear. Thanks again for your help on this.
Now in regards to Herpes, what are my chances that I am good to go with no symptoms after 11 days? Our encounter was not very rough as the position I was in was sitting upright so my pubic area was not thrusted up in a good position to get a lot of contact. It was dark so I was not able to see if the stripper had any sores or anything. I assume if she was having an outbreak and sex is “not something she normally does” then she obviously wouldn’t have had intercourse then. Does that sound like a reasonable assumption? Just talking with you 2 is already making my anxiety subside. Just really started off on a bad foot when the doctor I saw said I need to immediately get on PEP. That was really hard to hear. Thanks again for your help on this.
Most people with herpes won't have sex with an outbreak. I can't say 100% of people with herpes wouldn't, of course, but the vast majority wouldn't because they know it transmits more with an outbreak, and because it most often hurts to have sex with an outbreak.
Condoms offer significant protection, and if you haven't had symptoms by 11 days, that's a really good sign.
Obviously, I can't offer guarantees, but I'd be surprised if you got anything from this.
Condoms offer significant protection, and if you haven't had symptoms by 11 days, that's a really good sign.
Obviously, I can't offer guarantees, but I'd be surprised if you got anything from this.
Ok words can’t express my gratitude for your time. I am glad that I am 11 days in with no symptoms but the 70% or more of people that they say online that don’t have any symptoms really scares me. I am really going to try and not do any herpes tests from previous posts that I have seen of yours since a false positive would send my anxiety into outer space. Last question is why is the 21 day mark such a good indication of no infection, but what if I have no symptoms like they say most people don’t even know they have it? So confusing.
A majority of people don't get symptoms of oral herpes. While it is true that many people who have genital herpes don't know they have it, it's not true that they are all asymptomatic. Many might have mild symptoms that they don't recognize as herpes because for many years, we thought that herpes only gave big, bad ugly blisters.
Also, for a time, we thought that a lot more people were asymptomatic, but then we realized that many people had false positive hsv2 tests, so it's hard to say for sure.
I fully realize that vague answers like this do nothing for people with anxiety, but herpes testing kind of sucks.
Remember that you had protected everything. Your chances are very low. Just keep repeating that.
Also, for a time, we thought that a lot more people were asymptomatic, but then we realized that many people had false positive hsv2 tests, so it's hard to say for sure.
I fully realize that vague answers like this do nothing for people with anxiety, but herpes testing kind of sucks.
Remember that you had protected everything. Your chances are very low. Just keep repeating that.
Ok thank you for your time. What you do for people is amazing. Have a great holidays and please send positive vibes that I make it through Q1 with no disappointing news. I don’t know how I am going to be able to wait long enough for testing. Wish I could just turn my brain off but this pain and guilt I am going through I deserve and will be a better person from this experience. Very low, very low, very low. Will keep repeating! :)
I'm sending you all the positive vibes, and wishing you the happiest of holidays. :)
In the meantime, while you try to get through this, why not do yourself a huge favor and try some therapy? It doesn't sound like this level of anxiety is new for you. It rarely just comes out of nowhere.
Also, remember that guilt doesn't equal risk. :)
In the meantime, while you try to get through this, why not do yourself a huge favor and try some therapy? It doesn't sound like this level of anxiety is new for you. It rarely just comes out of nowhere.
Also, remember that guilt doesn't equal risk. :)
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You are reading content posted in the Herpes Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
