hsv2

[acornnut]

Well ive been travelling nearly a year and was very unluck enough to have picked up
this scrap on the end of my tinker,ive been to a doctor and was told i had syphiliis,but
then went to the hospital and was then told that i got that a few year before and didnt even know
about it,so how was cure by medication i was taken the... arrgh brilliant.
So the doctor say no.. that in your blood but it actually hsv is what you have... what a job.

So being that im very confident and say what i think and dont like beat around the bush,how
the hello an i ever going to get a relationship in the future.If i ad someone come up to me and say...
"oh well by the way i got herpes" i would stick around... and ive no got this virus for life.

Lucky for me i actually just had a blood test on the of chance i guess,but still taken about not
whanting to even think let alone wnat to have sex ever again.

How do people deal with this.. im only 26 yrs and feel like there no point even taking to female now,why would thay understand apart from ive get blisters on the end of my weener.

?

[gracefromHHP]

I've had hsv2 myself for 22 years.  I'm not just spouting off some idealistic way of dealing with genital herpes - I'm living it myself too.  Have I been turned down because of genital herpes? Yes, twice I have been but the rest of my partners have not had any issues with it.  I've had more fellows decide to not date me after they've met my dogs than I have had them run away once I've told them about my herpes.  Really I have.  

So why did I bring up pregnancy prevention too?  Don't just assume that a partner has pregnancy prevention taken care of - you need to specifically ask if they do. Might as well just work it all into the same conversation as std's and your herpes and get it all over and done with at one time.   Even if it's just a one night stand you certainly don't want a phone call a few months later congratulating you on being a daddy and asking what address their lawyer should send the paper work for support to do you?  It's all part of being sexually responsible and something we all should be doing whether we have a std or not.  this is what being a normal person is about.  Knowing that you have genital herpes didn't crush anything - it just made you more aware of what you should've been doing all along.  How can you not expect to pick up something when you are exchanging saliva and body fluids with someone?

If you and a female partner did nothing but avoid sex anytime you had obvious genital symptoms, her risk would be about 8-10%/year of contracting hsv2 from you. If you take daily suppressive therapy her risk is cut in half. Throw in condoms too with all of that and your female partner would have about a 2-3% risk/year on average of contracting hsv2 from you. Pretty reasonable odds don't you think? Certainly not a reason to assume that you won't find a partner and not a reason to stop having a sex life!

Oh and really your name isn't really acornut?  I would've never guessed.

grace

[acornnut]

I just thought i should get tested,and funny enough while waiting a week for my results,blisters came up... lucky me.

So your answering like ive got a partner,which i dont,and why are we talking about pregnacy,i dont want a baby... and you make it sound so easy,do you have hsv ?

And doesnt hsv come up other places other than my genitals,so the condom isnt going to help if its around that area?

So i could date someone with the same disease...nice.So in reality im not a normal person anymore then,sex was a big part of my life and now thats been cancelled out and crushed... sound like a wicked life.

Acornut of course not my real name,which i shant every use on this site :)

thanks very much for your reply.

acornut

[gracefromHHP]

So how were you diagnosed as having genital herpes? Blood test, lesion culture or just visual exam?

There are much nicer ways to describe this to a potential partner than Hi my name is acornut and I get blisters on my weiner, do you want to date me? he he he   The reality is that we all should be talking about std's, testing for them, pregnancy prevention and condom use when we are having sex with someone but I think typically most of us just assume that if the other person had something, they'd know it and would tell us. The reality is that most folks aren't getting tested regularly and most folks aren't informed about std's in general.  This is your chance to do it better for yourself.  Don't focus just on whatyou know you have, remember it's about what they might have too - especially about what they might not know that they have.  Talk about when they were tested. Ask if they plan on you using condoms ( and if you don't like using them, let them know ). Make sure they have the pregnancy part covered.  Oh and let them know that you have genital herpes, what type and what precautions you are taking to reduce their risk.

will gals run from you once they hear this? No way!  I've found that most folks appreciate the honesty when you let them know about it ahead of time as have most of my friends. There are also hsv dating sites too to consider if you would rather not have to deal with the whole "talk" - just remember that hsv isn't the only std out there though if you use them.

grace