Aa
should i be as worried as i am?
hello -
i am an otherwise healthy female in her early twenties, and was diagnosed with hsv2 nearly two years ago. shortly after my diagnosis, i had protected intercourse (condom) with a male when no visible hsv symptoms on myself were present. although i am unsure of his medical history, as far as i know, he didnt have a full-blown hsv reaction after our night together, seeing as he has not tried to track me down in a fit of rage since (but then again, who knows).
now it has been almost 2 years later, and four days ago i met someone and had the same type of encounter - relatively short-lived intercourse WITH the use of a condom. the days and moments leading up to my latest escapade, i was feeling incredibly healthy and as though i did not even have the virus in the slightest (yes- i am aware that herpes is for life). but NOW, four days later, i have been obsessing so much over the situation and consistently wondering to myself if i have passed the virus on to him. this constant worrying has sparked prodomal activity (im itchy, hot and otherwise uncomfortable in the genital region).
i am wondering what the odds are of me transmitting the virus with use of a condom, the fact that im having these prodromal feelings now, and with the guy having fingered me at different times throughout (perhaps touching his balls later?). i have been having such anxiety about this because i purposefully was not sleeping with ANYONE due to the fact that i am infected and do not want to pass it on. i guess after a two-year abstinence, i got a little out of hand.
the night that i was given herpes in the first place, i was raped and it has been tormenting me ever since. i do not want one drunken mistake of mine to follow this fellow around for the rest of his life, either.
please let me know what your thoughts are, and thank you very much for your time.
i am an otherwise healthy female in her early twenties, and was diagnosed with hsv2 nearly two years ago. shortly after my diagnosis, i had protected intercourse (condom) with a male when no visible hsv symptoms on myself were present. although i am unsure of his medical history, as far as i know, he didnt have a full-blown hsv reaction after our night together, seeing as he has not tried to track me down in a fit of rage since (but then again, who knows).
now it has been almost 2 years later, and four days ago i met someone and had the same type of encounter - relatively short-lived intercourse WITH the use of a condom. the days and moments leading up to my latest escapade, i was feeling incredibly healthy and as though i did not even have the virus in the slightest (yes- i am aware that herpes is for life). but NOW, four days later, i have been obsessing so much over the situation and consistently wondering to myself if i have passed the virus on to him. this constant worrying has sparked prodomal activity (im itchy, hot and otherwise uncomfortable in the genital region).
i am wondering what the odds are of me transmitting the virus with use of a condom, the fact that im having these prodromal feelings now, and with the guy having fingered me at different times throughout (perhaps touching his balls later?). i have been having such anxiety about this because i purposefully was not sleeping with ANYONE due to the fact that i am infected and do not want to pass it on. i guess after a two-year abstinence, i got a little out of hand.
the night that i was given herpes in the first place, i was raped and it has been tormenting me ever since. i do not want one drunken mistake of mine to follow this fellow around for the rest of his life, either.
please let me know what your thoughts are, and thank you very much for your time.
i started having itching and painful urination about 3 days after my sexual encounter, followed by the classic crazy-painful sores, swollen lymph-nodes in the groin and a discomfort that disrupted my life to the point that i could barely even stand up straight let alone survive going to work. the day after i was raped i had gone to the doctors and they checked me out and tested for gonorrhea and chlamydia, but because i didnt have any active lesions, they did not test for herpes. it wasnt until about the fourth day that i was waking myself in the middle of the night from insane amounts of scratching and pain in my nether-regions. i went for another checkup and the doctor told me he was 99.999% certain it was herpes, did a culture test and it was later confirmed as hsv2. in the meantime i had actually been going to another doctor (sounds strange, i know) and she confirmed the same.
in the beginning and for lack of adequate funding at the time, i was on a valtrex-type knockoff (i cant remember what it was called), which did NOTHING for me.. so i switched to valtrex, and aside from the emotional state i was in, it cleared me up pretty quick.
i have definitely been considering going on surpressive therapy but at the same time, i am the kind of person who doesnt even like to take a pill for a headache let alone one pill every day for the rest of my life. but i guess this is something that is reality and i have to deal with it :\
i know sex comes with a ridiculous amount of risk, but like every human i do enjoy it and i have had plenty of opportunity for relationships in the last two years. im tired of backing off and just allowing potential relationships to fizzle out before they even have a real chance because i feel so ashamed of myself.
i feel as though time is slowly making me stronger, but then i have a moment like what happened this past week and i feel completely thrown off.
thanks for your suggestion, and i cant thank you enough for the support you are all giving everyone here. :)
in the beginning and for lack of adequate funding at the time, i was on a valtrex-type knockoff (i cant remember what it was called), which did NOTHING for me.. so i switched to valtrex, and aside from the emotional state i was in, it cleared me up pretty quick.
i have definitely been considering going on surpressive therapy but at the same time, i am the kind of person who doesnt even like to take a pill for a headache let alone one pill every day for the rest of my life. but i guess this is something that is reality and i have to deal with it :\
i know sex comes with a ridiculous amount of risk, but like every human i do enjoy it and i have had plenty of opportunity for relationships in the last two years. im tired of backing off and just allowing potential relationships to fizzle out before they even have a real chance because i feel so ashamed of myself.
i feel as though time is slowly making me stronger, but then i have a moment like what happened this past week and i feel completely thrown off.
thanks for your suggestion, and i cant thank you enough for the support you are all giving everyone here. :)
instead of sitting at home and avoiding intimate relationships, have you thought about going on daily suppressive therapy for extra peace of mind? it also means less recurrences too so that your sex life is disrupted less often :)
how were you originally diagnosed as having hsv2?
grace
how were you originally diagnosed as having hsv2?
grace
thank you for your honesty and for the link :)
this has been quite the lesson for me already and i surely will not be making the same mistake again.
this has been quite the lesson for me already and i surely will not be making the same mistake again.
And don't want to sound judgmental nor make you feel bad. It's typically the answer you'll get here on the forum, as to telling a partner you have herpes prior to having sex.
Sometimes being fully knowledgeable about herpes helps. A great resource is the herpes handbook, here:
http://www.westoverheights.com/genital_herpes/handbook/view_the_chapters.html
Sometimes being fully knowledgeable about herpes helps. A great resource is the herpes handbook, here:
http://www.westoverheights.com/genital_herpes/handbook/view_the_chapters.html
It really is the right thing to do, morally and ethically, to inform your partner of your herpes status prior to having sex. Quite honestly, in this day and age, if you transmit it to someone when you knowingly have it, without telling them first, they could seek legal action in a civil court setting.
You can in fact transmit herpes without symptoms; it's called viral shedding. You can feel "incredibly healthy" and still be shedding the virus.
As to risk to your partner, chances are low for herpes transmission based on a one-time protected encounter.
You can in fact transmit herpes without symptoms; it's called viral shedding. You can feel "incredibly healthy" and still be shedding the virus.
As to risk to your partner, chances are low for herpes transmission based on a one-time protected encounter.
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You are reading content posted in the Herpes Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
