Teenager doesn't want to come home

[toughlove17]

Hello everyone, this is my first time going into this site and really hope God put it in front of me to get the answer I need.  My 16 yr daughter has been out since yesterday afterschool, she was going to stay over a friends house and when I confronted her that I wanted to talk to her friends mom, everythihng started.  She's been lying and lying, but the point is that she does not want to come home and I have no idea where she's at. She doesn't answer my telephone calls but has texted me that she's ok and she will come home when she's ready.  I feel with no power no matter what I tell he, she doesnt tell where she's at. I went to the Miami Beach police and they told me that I cannot report her missing because she's been in contact with me, therefore she has not been kidnapped, abducted or any of that stuff.  So in other words is all up to the paretns.  please help me I feel my daughter is in control and I cannot do anything until she comes home.  But I am very worry.  thanks for reading

[anna1ramos]

  I am no way near to feeling this way.  My husband and I are waiting this out with the same way you are thinking, hoping our son will learn several life lessons from this,  but my heart just wants him back.  I am aching, hurt, weak, a basket case.  I don't know how much longer I can stay strong and resist the urge to ask him to come back.  What if he doesn't?  What about making sure nothing happens to him?  So much is going through my mind.  

[Realove]

What about reporting her a runaway? Isn't there protection to the parent of a rebellious child, by having a report on record? My heart goes out to all hurting moms, dads, grandparents and families.

I have a 17 yr old. She will turn 18 in  four months. Senior in high school. She has always been spunky, but kind. Her first job she made a friend. That girl seemed a little off but I chalked it up as an over protective mom. After all. She was going to be 18 soon and I can't protect her from life's experiences! Could I?

Long story short; her behavior was becoming more rebellious and she too would refuse to come home. So, I used the law. Once she was home and would start to act up; I would call the police and tell them she was acting out of control and I'm scared for her. Once she knew they were coming she suddenly got control! When they arrived I would explain the situation. They would talk to her and peace (of sorts) would resume. After about eight times of calling the police, they proceeded to tell me they couldn't continue responding to these calls. I replied with "yes, you will!" They looked at me and said "NO". I closed it with: "if you are going to take away MY parental ability to discipline MY child in an effort to raise a respectful, law abiding person: then I WILL allow you to discipline them!" The officer informed me I had the right to discipline in a "spare the rod, spoil the child" kind of way along with the perimeters. Guess what!? We have more rights than we give ourselves! Look into your states laws. Perhaps there are reports you can file that protect you, as well as, show our children who really is the alpha male. Please understand I don't think beating a child is the answer. But, sometimes rebellion needs to be taken behind the barn with a switch and other times with prayers.

WE ARE THE PARENTS. THEY ARE OUR CHILDREN! Who loves them more than us? Who wants their safety more than us? Who has their best interest at heart more than us? I remember the day when "we" would get in trouble, our friends would ask us to play and we would say....*with head hung low....I can't. I'm grounded. When asked what happened, we would reply by stating our wrong doing. Now a days when their friends ask "what happened?" The response generally is......"my parents are stupid" they don't take responsibility! It's a world of entitlement and offenses! It's all about the children's rights. When do we as parents, take back our rights?

[Thiarose]

My son is 17, he will be 18 next summer.  He lost his license already, and got an MIP 3 weeks ago.  I have tried everything with this kid as best I can as a working single parent! Last week I took him out for dinner and he actually spit a couple of pieces of food at my!!!! That was the last straw for me!  I want him to go live with his dad even though I know I love him and will miss him (or the way he use to be...)  he is very disrespectful, almost threatening, smokes pot, already went through treatment several months ago. Gets in trouble at school for disrespecting the teachers.  In the past I was letting him use my car, but he was not to go out of our city limits, he did it all the time!  He says things that he knows should hurt my feelings deeply.   But all in all, I still feel guilty for wanting him to go live with his dad! he doesn't want to do that because he lives in a different town, but I just can't take it anymore, I am stressed, worried, angry, and sad all the time as I watch him make his poor choices every single day!  I feel for the single parents who don't have the option of shipping their rebellious kid to the other parent's.  I will still continue to try to get him to go to Job Corps.

[steve197]

The main problem between teens and their parents is that they don’t understand each other not even want to try. The age difference between them creates big misunderstanding and problems. I think to solve this problem both have to understand each other so they can solve their problem with their experience.

[nancynance]

I dont know what to do my daughter left my house after an argument with me 4days ago I know who shes with but I dont know where she lives she's contacted me though facebook but she dont plan to come back what can I do she's only 15

[Genny18102]

Thank you so much for your post. Your unfortunate story is very similar to mines, but my son started when he was 13. I's terrible, i don't wish this pain even on my worst enemy, which by the way i don't have. God Bless and hope things are doing better.