Aa
does my pregnant girlfriend hate me or is it hormones?
hi. me and my fiance used to be so loving we moved in together pretty quick we done everything together and loved each other more than anything, we decided to try for a baby and looked forward to marrage and being a family, she fell pregnant and is 3 months pregnant yesterday, the last 3 months have been so hard, it seems all her love has died she wants nothing to do with me anymore she packed my bags and threw me out 5 days ago, i havent seen her for 3 days i rang her phone its turned off i ring her mams, she answers but has told me not to ring no more i havent seen her for 3 days i told her today how much this is killing me and i havent eat or slept, she told me she has been fine :( ,its as if she just turned her feelings off over night and there is nothing i can do or say to change her mind she says she doesnt want no one else and we wont split up completely i can still see her now and then but i can never move back in with her, she says its not her hormones making her like this (but i think it is as she was never like this before) she says she does love me but she cant stand to be around me i cant talk to her or she will walk out i cant kiss, cuddle her nothing, when i tell her its upsetting me she laughs in my face, she says she doesnt know why she feels like this she just feels it,she wont go nowhere with me, not even to the shop, she dumped me on valentines day and didnt care about her presents or look at her card, i have tried everything i can to make her happy but it seems she is getting angrier every day, when will this stop i want my loving caring gf back, i love her soooooooo much i know it must be hormones she cant just fall out of love with me like that we were soooooo close, its killing me has anyone pls got any advice on why she feels so angry, she seems to have no interest in the pregnancy at all, and doesnt even want people to know im dying to tell people, i know its not her and it must be something to do with her hormones or something as we both wanted this soooo much, she was never ever angry i never seen her angry once before she got pregnant, will this anger and hate wear off will she ever come back to me, we went to our 3 month scan and i really thought it would put a smile on her face, her only reaction was to say to me "im suprised its still alive", it seems everything she says to me is aimed at breaking me, and im completely broken, if it is hormones when will they settle down a little? it as if she went from being loving, affectionate and caring, to having nothing for me. It's as if all of her love for me died, and it's killing me inside, I love this woman more than anything, and can't wait to be the father of her child, but I don't know if I can handle the hurt I feel on the inside anymore. This is breaking my heart, and I am a complete disaster, can pregnancy really be this difficult? What can I do? I am completely lost.
What do i do.. it seems like i can never say or do anything right now that she is prenant
Sorry, the above post should of said "she could not go back"..... i forgot the NOT.
Well, it seems i follow suit with plenty of you here.
My GF and I had the most amazing, beautiful, loving and involved relationship, we both said we were the best thing that has ever happened to each other... and at 41 and 38... we had some back ground to base that on.
Everything was amazing... Until she fell pregnant... we had disussed what we would do if it ever happened. She said she would have an abortion... i never suggested it, she did. I just said "Ok, so long as we have had the talk". Not but 1 month later, we find out she is pregnant. She was elated, aparently she had been trying for 3 years with the last partner. Anyway... we went through the rocky time as i did mention we had only known each other 3 months and was it a good idea?? We both tried to please each other... Then she left, said she was getting an abortion and the we were over... Well, we got passed that, i was happy she was having our baby and we were once again back on track.
She is a very very sensitive soul at the best of times, but having a hormone IUD sent her even worse.... seems being pregnant is doing the exact same thing. She is very quite and reserved, she does not do confrontation at ALL... which is great, but also very dangerous, as you never know what she has bottled up inside her.
She leaves me a couple of times during the pregnancy over the smallest things... one was just a silly comment... the other, i have no, we woke up, we made love, i ask her how she slept, she said terrible, i was up all night, i just can't see it working, sorry its over. BANG!! I was in total shock, she just instegetted sex, it was her idea.. then the minute its over, she dumps me.. in fact, it was right in front of another person... her friend.
We get back together after that... lots of work and i didn't think it would even happen... Ok, happy again, working hard together, then we go on a holiday for 2 weeks. Holiday was good, but we did have a couple of moments, one was when we were walking to dinner, she was holding my hand, but i couldn't walk on the path, so i let her hand go and walked next to her on the grass... after 20 seconds, she sits down and begins to sulk, then cry... Now i should of gone and cuddled her, but i really had no idea what i'd done and was just trying to snap her out of it and make her happy, dinner was only 1 minute walk away. Anyway, i walk off to the resturant and left her there, thinking she will follow (ok, big mistake)... long storey short, she goes back to the room and i was waiting at the restaurant. When i get back tot he room, she is in bed and very upset...
When we get back home, we are together for the week, she had started smoking a lot and i was worried about it and told her so.... She just told me, she doesn't stop me doing anything (true).. i said i was just trying to speak for a little one that didn't have a voice yet.
At the end of the week, she just dumps me.. she's she is happier and more at peace by herself.
Now i know i have told you bad stuff i have done here, but there is miles and miles of good stuff, always helping around the house, working for her, helping with her home renovation, being thoughtful, breakfast in bed for her every morning, with her pregnancy tablets and a cup of tea.
Its been 6 weeks since we had spoken, i had taken all her things back that were at my house (as she had asked).... Then i ring and ask to met up on Christmas Eve. she agreed, sheepishly. I turn up with a basket of christmas gifts for her and the baby and her dog, a card, a letter and some flowers... i know,its sounds i bit much, but i had secretly been buying her gifts during the year.
We had a good day... had a good talk, she told me she could go back, that she was broken and it wasn't all my fault (other passed relationships also hurt her)... we drank a bottle of wine and for an hour or two, she was her normal self, super happy, talking all about me and the fun times we shared, it was like old times again. She then invited me to her bed, just to lay down, she snuggled into me and rested her head on my chest, it was so nice to feel that bliss again. I told her i had forgotten how good this felt.. she told me she was thinking of the time we made love on my sun lounge. I said, hey stop that.... next thing i was horny and we made love. It was strange, she couldn't kiss me, but she was enjoying it so much, yet also had moments where her eyes were closed so she didn't have to engage in me.
We finished, both probably realised it should not of happened, we rested together, had a shower one after the other... then she was getting ready to go out... I said i better get going and she pretty much just said "by" from another room.... back to being cold and indifferent.
I understand the sex was the cause of any tension, i am sure she never meant it to happen... no doubt thought i might get the wrong idea.
I can also see that having sex at that time... just put us miles back.
5 days later, we speak on the phone about her home renovations... all is ok, i asked her if anything was wrong and she said it was starnge last time we met... I asked which part, she said the last part (ie, the sex)... I apologised, said i also felt bad. She said "Oh well" we had a try (not sure what that is meant to mean???)
I went on the say i had been thinking about everything she had to say that day and totally agreed with her, that we shouldn't be a couple. I went on the say "You must of felt so unappreciated at times when we were together".. She said it was ok.... she is just tired and the house is dragging on.
We spoke about the house and when the baby comes... she seems to feel a bit more at ease after the chat.... But she seems happy in her own little world of just her and the dog and her half renovated house.
I really hope she is ok... i would love to help her get it all done, but i now understand that is her "space" her indepentance and she must be left alone to live as she wishes....
It has taken me a long time to come to this understanding ( and a lot of heart ache, more than i have ever felt)... But ultimately, i support her decision, she has my best wishes.
Being at the birth is going to be strange i guess... but i will cross that bridge when it comes....
All i can say.. is it is such a pity, something so beautiful went so pear shaped, and it seems mainly over poor communication, some very sensitive hormones that i am sure she is not even aware of and some silly stubbness on my behalf.
It has killed what was once effortless and beautiful in everyway.
It really seems so weird to see 2 perfectly normal and loving people, that only want the same goal (to be happy, loved and a family) to now be walking away into separate lives.I do worry about the baby in all this... it seems she doesn't so much... or parhaps she just thinks it will be better this way.
Either way, it doesn't matter anymore.. that is the path she has chosen for her own reasons.
I just really feel for all those on these forums that i read about.. it is heart wrenching, all consuming and sometimes, breathlessly desperate...
But... it is what it is, you can't force it.. Only go with it.
Thank you for listening to my ramble
My GF and I had the most amazing, beautiful, loving and involved relationship, we both said we were the best thing that has ever happened to each other... and at 41 and 38... we had some back ground to base that on.
Everything was amazing... Until she fell pregnant... we had disussed what we would do if it ever happened. She said she would have an abortion... i never suggested it, she did. I just said "Ok, so long as we have had the talk". Not but 1 month later, we find out she is pregnant. She was elated, aparently she had been trying for 3 years with the last partner. Anyway... we went through the rocky time as i did mention we had only known each other 3 months and was it a good idea?? We both tried to please each other... Then she left, said she was getting an abortion and the we were over... Well, we got passed that, i was happy she was having our baby and we were once again back on track.
She is a very very sensitive soul at the best of times, but having a hormone IUD sent her even worse.... seems being pregnant is doing the exact same thing. She is very quite and reserved, she does not do confrontation at ALL... which is great, but also very dangerous, as you never know what she has bottled up inside her.
She leaves me a couple of times during the pregnancy over the smallest things... one was just a silly comment... the other, i have no, we woke up, we made love, i ask her how she slept, she said terrible, i was up all night, i just can't see it working, sorry its over. BANG!! I was in total shock, she just instegetted sex, it was her idea.. then the minute its over, she dumps me.. in fact, it was right in front of another person... her friend.
We get back together after that... lots of work and i didn't think it would even happen... Ok, happy again, working hard together, then we go on a holiday for 2 weeks. Holiday was good, but we did have a couple of moments, one was when we were walking to dinner, she was holding my hand, but i couldn't walk on the path, so i let her hand go and walked next to her on the grass... after 20 seconds, she sits down and begins to sulk, then cry... Now i should of gone and cuddled her, but i really had no idea what i'd done and was just trying to snap her out of it and make her happy, dinner was only 1 minute walk away. Anyway, i walk off to the resturant and left her there, thinking she will follow (ok, big mistake)... long storey short, she goes back to the room and i was waiting at the restaurant. When i get back tot he room, she is in bed and very upset...
When we get back home, we are together for the week, she had started smoking a lot and i was worried about it and told her so.... She just told me, she doesn't stop me doing anything (true).. i said i was just trying to speak for a little one that didn't have a voice yet.
At the end of the week, she just dumps me.. she's she is happier and more at peace by herself.
Now i know i have told you bad stuff i have done here, but there is miles and miles of good stuff, always helping around the house, working for her, helping with her home renovation, being thoughtful, breakfast in bed for her every morning, with her pregnancy tablets and a cup of tea.
Its been 6 weeks since we had spoken, i had taken all her things back that were at my house (as she had asked).... Then i ring and ask to met up on Christmas Eve. she agreed, sheepishly. I turn up with a basket of christmas gifts for her and the baby and her dog, a card, a letter and some flowers... i know,its sounds i bit much, but i had secretly been buying her gifts during the year.
We had a good day... had a good talk, she told me she could go back, that she was broken and it wasn't all my fault (other passed relationships also hurt her)... we drank a bottle of wine and for an hour or two, she was her normal self, super happy, talking all about me and the fun times we shared, it was like old times again. She then invited me to her bed, just to lay down, she snuggled into me and rested her head on my chest, it was so nice to feel that bliss again. I told her i had forgotten how good this felt.. she told me she was thinking of the time we made love on my sun lounge. I said, hey stop that.... next thing i was horny and we made love. It was strange, she couldn't kiss me, but she was enjoying it so much, yet also had moments where her eyes were closed so she didn't have to engage in me.
We finished, both probably realised it should not of happened, we rested together, had a shower one after the other... then she was getting ready to go out... I said i better get going and she pretty much just said "by" from another room.... back to being cold and indifferent.
I understand the sex was the cause of any tension, i am sure she never meant it to happen... no doubt thought i might get the wrong idea.
I can also see that having sex at that time... just put us miles back.
5 days later, we speak on the phone about her home renovations... all is ok, i asked her if anything was wrong and she said it was starnge last time we met... I asked which part, she said the last part (ie, the sex)... I apologised, said i also felt bad. She said "Oh well" we had a try (not sure what that is meant to mean???)
I went on the say i had been thinking about everything she had to say that day and totally agreed with her, that we shouldn't be a couple. I went on the say "You must of felt so unappreciated at times when we were together".. She said it was ok.... she is just tired and the house is dragging on.
We spoke about the house and when the baby comes... she seems to feel a bit more at ease after the chat.... But she seems happy in her own little world of just her and the dog and her half renovated house.
I really hope she is ok... i would love to help her get it all done, but i now understand that is her "space" her indepentance and she must be left alone to live as she wishes....
It has taken me a long time to come to this understanding ( and a lot of heart ache, more than i have ever felt)... But ultimately, i support her decision, she has my best wishes.
Being at the birth is going to be strange i guess... but i will cross that bridge when it comes....
All i can say.. is it is such a pity, something so beautiful went so pear shaped, and it seems mainly over poor communication, some very sensitive hormones that i am sure she is not even aware of and some silly stubbness on my behalf.
It has killed what was once effortless and beautiful in everyway.
It really seems so weird to see 2 perfectly normal and loving people, that only want the same goal (to be happy, loved and a family) to now be walking away into separate lives.I do worry about the baby in all this... it seems she doesn't so much... or parhaps she just thinks it will be better this way.
Either way, it doesn't matter anymore.. that is the path she has chosen for her own reasons.
I just really feel for all those on these forums that i read about.. it is heart wrenching, all consuming and sometimes, breathlessly desperate...
But... it is what it is, you can't force it.. Only go with it.
Thank you for listening to my ramble
I seems you are a really nice guy i do believe it could just the pregnancy when im pregnant (witch i am) i have a 0 sex drive i don't want to kiss cuddle or anything i don't even like sweet talk and i get offended really easy but also my b/f is a jerk but any way i think your girl will turn around after the baby is born
ay man, my gf broke up wit me cuz she shed she lost feelings.ciuples days later she find out she pregoz.she slept over times after she broke it off n used to kiss me once in a while i really dnt knw our stauts but now i give her choke space we bareky talk now.sometimes i feel like she realy lost feelings but i hope its jus her hormones but jus knw u not alone
im 21 im so in love with my xgirlfrend we was so happy and i now she loved me but she fell pregnant 2 munths ago we broke up about one week ago but was *** far *** i new still in love she came and spent 3 days with me at my flat we made the most amazing love and she said i was just using her as a empty but i realy wassent im so in love with her i carnt sleep or eat she has realy broke my heart and when she came for the 3 days she told me on the 3rd day that when she kisses me it duse not feel the same anymore but then she kissed me and told me it was lovely and then kissed me again and told me it dussent feel the same again i now she has alot off stress been preggnant and i dont always make it better but is it her hormoness cass she said she only felt like this since she got pregnant and that she loves me but she is up and down all the time plz help me i dont now what to do i havent slept or eaten for ages im so in love with her i carnt evan think about uther women i need advice :(
You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy Relationships Community
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.
