WTF?!?!?!?!

[Beaz95]

So, my husband just told me that since his mother can't be in the delivery room, HE refuses to be in there. Are you f*cking kidding me?!?! I'm so p*ssed right now. His mother understands that I don't want her in there, only because I'm not comfortable with her like that. Why can't he??? I've literally just narrowed it down to my husband and my own mother, but the  fact that he won't be in there no makes me want to reconsider a lot of things. Ex: my marital status. Am I wrong in not wanting her in there? Am I being selfish? Is this just my hormones or is this a serious issue. I don't want to fight for a cause that IS caused by pregnancy hormones. :'(

[Beaz95]

Now* Not "no".

[syddie95]

I don't blame you I don't want my mother in law in the room. Have you tried sitting him down and explaining why? Wait until he's calmed down and try explaining.

[Mommylivie15]

No it's not you! He is wrong! I wouldn't want my husband mother in the wrong either, beside the face that I can't stand her, I'm not that comfortable around her! He is wrong for not being understanding

[kward2]

I did not want my mother in law in the delivery room either. It was too personal for me! It was nothing against her I just would have felt uncomfortable. She was very upset and angry but she got over it. My boyfriend asked me to change my mind but he understood.

[JumpingTummy]

My opinion is u should let her be in there. I think it's a beautiful experience just like u want ur mom there to share that wonderful moment I think that's how he feels too, well depends on ur relationship with her. Reconsider it good luck :)

[Katie_kate91]

I feel the same way... i didn't want and still don't want my SO's Mother in the room,  only my mom... only difference is, is that he understands... you have every right to be mad and don't let his pitty party ruin your day! he will get over it

[Sue_2ndbabyontheway]

You can have who ever you feel comfortable with to be in the delivery room with you . I only had my husband with me my first pregnancy and this time I'm going to keep it the same . In my opinion I wouldn't want my mother in law to be in there with me and if I don't want her to I won't let her .....

[joli_alicia]

It's your body & if your not comfortable
He presence won't help. Besides for her to see your whoohaw is private

[nonishy]

I think he has a problem. And definitely needs to get his priorities straight.  
I actually want to be alone, and my husband understands that.
But seriously your husband won't go in there cause you don't want his mom in there. Wow, that's something else.  
You need to talk to him and find out wtf is going through his head. And if he still don't want to be in there, i say just take your mother and let her cut the cord.

[ejsmama17]

I had the same problem with my boyfriend and after days of arguing he finally got honest about the reasons and said that he is worried that he won't be able to handle it and wanted his mom there to support him. With his extreme anxiety I get that because I won't be able to help him with it while I'm trying to push a watermelon out of my vagina... Tell him that it's really important to you to be in there and ask if he is worried or something?

[kward2]

Hm, I disagree JumpingTummy. I understand him wanting to share it with his mother...but he's not the one in pain. He's not the one who's going to be exposed and going through what she will be. I wanted to make myself as comfortable as possible during labor and I wanted my mother there for comfort and advice considering I was pretty sure my boyfriend would be clueless, and he was. Lol.

[Beaz95]

I have but he's just completely irrate. He won't listen to me. I've talked to his mom many times about it and she's fine with not being in there. I'm just not comfortable with her like that, you know? I'd be more focused on how uncomfortable I was than on the baby. We have a good relationship, just not up close and personal like that. I want her there when the baby is born, just not while I'm delivering.

[asmit0ia]

My boyfriend got very mad when I told him I just wanted him in there! He said I was being selfish and trying to control everything:( I'm not even having my own mother in the room, so Why would I feel comfortably with his. My mom understood completely but his is acting like I don't like her and mad at her since I don't want her in there. I just put it like this for my boyfriend "you have seen my vagina, I don't want your mother seeing it" I also just explained to him I'm sure I'm going to be a totally different person in labor and I don't want his mom or my mom seeing me cry,curse..ect. I would just feel more comfortably with him. It's not selfish at all. It's your body not his. You have the right to say who sees you give birth. I'm just going to tell my doctor on my 39 week appointment that I just want my boyfriend in the room, and the nurses and Dr will respect that and they will tell everyone who can and can't come on the room on your request. They can lie and just say 1 person or in your case 2

[wayfunmommy]

Your husband is being a horse's behind. If he chose to miss the birth if his child because he himself is acting like a child, he doesn't deserve to be in there anyway.
However, once it all starts to happen, I'm certain he'll change his mind.

[JayceeAtkins]

I didn't want my mom nor my mother in law in the room. It was very personal and a very special moment for us as a new family. And I'll do the same for this baby it's your personal choice.

[SabbaMS]

My mother in law came from India and I didn't want her in the delivery room even though my husband did, once I explained that I wasn't comfortable with the idea he took it a bit easier.

But he had the clause of it only then being him in the room with me... Didn't work out like that lol my mum ended up taking me in and staying with me through labour and called my husband when they moved me to the delivery suit.

We only live 10 minutes away. And my labour and delivery was eight and a half hours.

Good luck

[Beaz95]

I hope he changes his mind. There's so many things running through my head. He's never had a problem with it before today. Why is he now suddenly so upset?

[specialmom]

sounds like it is important to him.  Any way you could change your mind?  

[loveYou4Ever11]

I totally understand u..me and my mil have an okay relationship but i knew right away i did not want her in the room. Just my bf..thats a special moment for us. I don't need a 3rd person distracting attention

[loveYou4Ever11]

Maybe his mom said something to him about it. You never know

[luxah]

I'm sorry you have to deal with that. But if thats how he feels then I'd say don't even fight him on it anymore and just have your mom there. If your mil is understanding then theres no bad blood between you two which is good and less stressful. But as for him he's gonna cause more undue stress on you that you don't need. Good luck. You have to do whats best for you.

[Beaz95]

Specialmom, I'm not changing my mind on this one. I'm really not comfortable with her in there. He got to pick the name, the bring home outfit, Heck, he even picked out what kind of diapers our son will wear. This is really the only thing I get to decide on and now I'm being guilted into giving it up.

[danahenley]

Yeah hes crazy and my bf was actually the one that said he didn't want anyone else in the room cause that's a moment between me and him becoming parents i don't want my mom or his mom in there

[RockRose]

Beaz,  your last post was interesting.

I am TOTALLY in favor of if your mother is there,  his mother should be too (unless she is evil).  If she's normal,  and your mom is normal,  if you invite yours his is invited too.  

BUT REALLY - he picked the going home outfit for the baby?  He picked the name, and the going home outfit?  This is a really unusual guy.  I can't imagine my husband having any interest whatsoever in choosing the going home outfit if I was wanting to do it and capable.