So stress idk wat 2 do:'(

[Milkymoo]

Omg my man left me n i was so upset i drank .. and smoked weed... i feel so dum now i got so shiee faced lastnight wat do i do now i carnt believe i did that im only just found ouut im about 7 wks. Wll my baby b dum now? Shuld i get an abortion soo i dont harm bub animore?

[LauraJane92]

Do whatever you think is right. Abortions are the best thing for some mothers and the worst thing for others. Your hormones are everywhere during pregnancy and there is nothing wrong with how you dealt with things, you clearly know it was wrong, its easy for others to judge your situation but only you know what you want. You and only you can know what is best for your child and there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING wrong with being a single mother, I know plenty who have done a great job without any sign of a father. Whatever is meant to happen will happen for the best and I wish you all the luck in the world.

[babywhalen2]

You obviously know you messed up, so now you need to see your dr, talk to some trusted frienfs and put some safegaurds in place that will help you make good healthy choices for you and your baby. Then you have a few months to decide whether you can be a good parent right now, or if the best parenting decision you can make is choosing someone else to be your childs forever mommy and daddy. Do some research, soul searching etc, and above all make healthy choices for the future. Your stronger than you know. Lots of love, and all the best.

[DelainaN]

I agree^^^ it seems more like the drinking/ drug factor is being sugar coated, I don't think the biggest issue here is necessarily that you went in did it and if your baby will be " dumb" the disturbing part is that knowing your pregnant you didn't have the self control to make the right decision for baby. You might be lucky but what if your baby already has effects that are undetectable this early because of the nights you partied when you didn't know you were pregnant? And you guys are saying you should be fine? None of us know if your baby will be fine hun But some of the ladies above are right, if you keep the baby which I hope this was a reality check your days of partying are over. You think your bf leaving you is hard being a mom will be harder that's why it's crucial you make whichever  decision is best for you because your child will suffer if you continue making decisions like that

[Mandalaybayy]

I never said have an abortion but the way you handled the situation wasn't mother like. And someone on here said that partying early isn't going to affect the baby that's 100% untrue the first 12 weeks are critical to the brain development. Like I said once you found out that's when all that stops!! You don't need a man to raise a baby at all. So I hope you make the best decision for you and your future. If it was one time of drinking and smoking you probably are fine but there are no guarantees.

[alexis_mommy]

I would go to the doctor before deciding anything if u do not want to get an abortion. There are a lot of people that drink in the beginning before they know they are pregnant and nothing is wrong with the baby. Just don't do it anymore and see your doctor. They may have some advice. I would never call a baby dumb. Some babies are born with an illness even if there parents do everything exactly right. I have personal experiences with that in my family and you can still love and take care of that child. Just talk to your doctor.

[alexis_mommy]

I would go to the doctor before deciding anything if u do not want to get an abortion. There are a lot of people that drink in the beginning before they know they are pregnant and nothing is wrong with the baby. Just don't do it anymore and see your doctor. They may have some advice. I would never call a baby dumb. Some babies are born with an illness even if there parents do everything exactly right. I have personal experiences with that in my family and you can still love and take care of that child. Just talk to your doctor.

[mireyAND]

I think you need to see if you are mentally and emotionally ready, or can see yourself getting ready, to raise this baby..with the possibility of doing it on your own. If weed and alcohol is how you fix your problems, think about are you really ready to stop that kind of life,  even after the baby is born because he/she needs your full attention, not someone drunk or high. If you feel you can better yourself, do not drink or smoke anymore and take care of yourself for your baby. A lot of people don't get the chance to conceive, even when they really want a baby, so consider yourself lucky. If you aren't going to stop living like that, then.    Adoption can be one of the most selfless things to do for baby. Give him/her a loving home if you're not ready. Good luck

[afd126]

^^^^^^^^ agreed !!

[LauraMarie92]

I agree in some way with what others are saying but from your last post you know you made a mistake that doesnt mean your be a bad mum. I think you do need to concider your options but I really dont think you should be encouraged to get rid no ones perfect you need to weigh your options up. You can be a good mum. But you have to want this baby not because you might get your man back coz of it. But because its somthing you want. All you need is support only you will know if you can do this I hope you make a decision you wont regret

[afd126]

NOT INTENTIONALLY ..........but I drank once or twice in the first couple weeks of my pregnancy cause I didn't know I was pregnant yet .....point being I'm not even a person who does drink but unfortunately the time I did I was pregnant and it had no affect on my child who is now 3 ......just really sit down and think about what you want because if you did know you were pregnant then self control should have stopped you .......good luck and I hope you choose a decision that's best for you and your baby

[TeenMama2013]

I'm 16 and 13+6 days. And I'm single and its been hard thinking about the baby and mine future.its scary. But I put myself around people that will be there for me. And now I'm very confident that I will be able to raise this baby.
As far as drinking and smoking weed. Not the best choice :( but baby should be fine. I drank til I found out I was. And baby's healthy. I'm not gonna say you aren't ready for a baby like everyone else. You don't become a great person right away. It takes time! I'm against abortion because you ruin a future that you began to start! Hang in there

[sarahtom059]

Completely agree with delainaN 110%

[camisutton88]

I was told i couldn't conceive due to damage done from a motorcycle accident and i was drinking heavily every day and night for a king while, i found out i was pregnant 4 months into the pregnancy and immediately stopped drinking, long story short my daughter is now 2 years and 5 months old and she's as developed as a 4 year old, she's already reading, and counting to 30, and knows her abc's and is very intelligent...my point being, you never know you're baby could be just fine! I don't think one night of bad decisions will hurt, consider i had several nights and days of bad decisions. Duo what you can for you're babies health now and out baby first

[Sarah765]

You know you messed up, don't do something you will regret even more because of it.  Hopefully everything will be just fine.  I drank to much before I realized I was pregnant with my first.  She is now a beautiful almost 6 year old girl.  Smart add can be and very healthy. Just don't make the same mistake again, take care if yourself and the  baby, you be the person they can look up to.  Your going to have to grow up and start making your life about that little one, you can do this!

[DelainaN]

I agree with aurorasmommy2b ... In every way. Abortion is a very personal choice and I think you need to realize that chances are your probably not going to have a Cinderella story with your boyfriend, regardless what has happened with other people's relationships theirs may have worked out but you can't base your relationship on someone else's, clearly neither of you are ready to have a kid. Your bf left knowing your Prego and you went and got drunk and did drugs because of it.... Neither of you are stable or capable of putting your child first. So you need to consider your options. Realize the chance of you ending up as a single mom are quite high ( babies NEVER fix relationships so don't assume he's gonna stick around for the baby) especially judging by this behavior and if you can't do what's best for your baby then you should consider abortion or adoption. Bless that baby with a home where someone else can give her what you can't and if you can't imagine that then there is abortion. DO NOT let any of these ladies make that decision for you everyone has a right to choose what path they go on in life none of them live your life or are responsible for your child so you do what you think you need to do regardless if someone agrees with you or not. But you need to think seriously about your future with every option and figure out what suits you best.

[DelainaN]

I agree with aurorasmommy2b ... In every way. Abortion is a very personal choice and I think you need to realize that chances are your probably not going to have a Cinderella story with your boyfriend, regardless what has happened with other people's relationships theirs may have worked out but you can't base your relationship on someone else's, clearly neither of you are ready to have a kid. Your bf left knowing your Prego and you went and got drunk and did drugs because of it.... Neither of you are stable or capable of putting your child first. So you need to consider your options. Realize the chance of you ending up as a single mom are quite high ( babies NEVER fix relationships so don't assume he's gonna stick around for the baby) especially judging by this behavior and if you can't do what's best for your baby then you should consider abortion or adoption. Bless that baby with a home where someone else can give her what you can't and if you can't imagine that then there is abortion. DO NOT let any of these ladies make that decision for you everyone has a right to choose what path they go on in life none of them live your life or are responsible for your child so you do what you think you need to do regardless if someone agrees with you or not. But you need to think seriously about your future with every option and figure out what suits you best.

[Milkymoo]

I feel sooo bad i alreadi feel like a failure of a mother :(:( i dont need him buht im scared to do it on my own im scared i wont be good enuff !! My bubby wont have a papa 2 look up 2 :/ im never ever eveer going to do it again i swear i hope i havnt hurt my bub

[LauraMarie92]

I dont think smoking and drinking was wise. And I definitely
Don't think you should have a abortion you will regret it
For the rest of your life. No you dont sound ready but you can
Be I was 16 when I fell pregnant with my first and althought
It wasn't a happy ending the pregnancy its self made me
Grow up and realize what matter... I think you need to sit diwn
And think what u really want way I see it. Weed and drinking
Or your baby

[KellyRD]

Well i dont agree with how either one of these people responded to you. It was very rude. And no Abortion is never the answer. Since you are only 7w i dont think you really harmed your baby. Just dont keep repeating the same choices you made tonight. And forget about the "man" i know easier said then done but its for the best. Its not just you anymore. You have to think about baby and put all other things aside. Baby should give new meaning to your life and kinda a way to start over. Surround yourself with positive supportive people and you will be fine. If you need someone to talk to you can always message me. And congrats! Be good to yourself and to baby. Be pro Life! In the long run you wont regret it. :) and as for the young and growing up part. Becomein a mommy will deff. Change that and its like automatic you know what to do and it instantly makes you grow up. (Atleast it did for me) good luck sweetie. Stay positive and no more repeats of tonight.

[abbieejaynee]

Well I found out I was around the same and my boyfriend had left me for another girl, I was so scared of what was going to happen, I felt alone, I couldn't stay on my own, I was so depressed that I went out smoked and got drunk, but after my first scan I realized its not all about me anymore, I worked things out with the father and we our back together, I'm only 18 and seeing my little baby for the first time really opened up my eyes on how amazing little things in life are and now I'm 22 weeks and 5 days and my little baby boy is doing good, you just have to stay strong its not all about you anymore.

[Aurorasmommy2be]

I do agree with what mandalaybayy said. To an extent. I believe you are certainly not emotionally or physically ready to have a child, not to mention dealing with pregnancy. an abortion would probably be your best option. Its a scary thought but i had to when i was 18(abusive relationship) and it was the best decision i could've made. Now I'm 21, and happily engaged to the love of my life and we're expecting a baby girl (: i grew up and now im ready.

[Mandalaybayy]

If you're worried about having a "dumb baby" you probably Aren't ready to be a parent asking a question like that its sad that you resorted into drinking and smoking because of a man. Your probably not mentally ready for a child. In my opinion. Since u asked...the day you found out you were pregnant should have been the last time you smoked or drank until your baby was born why risk ruining a child's life because of your lack of self control? Smh