Vent, thinking about cancelling baby shower!, Ugh!

[KTowne]

My sister is supposed to do my baby shower, she called my other sister to see when she was having my niece's party to plan the date and time, we're doing it Nov. 4th, because my niece's birthday is the 3rd, and she lives 4 hours away so we just figured get it all done in one weekend so she wouldn't have to come up twice. So my baby shower is going to be on Sunday. I called and talked to my sister that lives here and she said ohh we're doing it at 10am so it doesn't ruin the rest of the day....UM. That is SO rude, first of all, ruin the whole day?! I don't think doing it at friggen 12 will ruin the day. So now my baby shower is going to be at friggen 10am on a Sunday, who is going to go to that!!? I'm SO annoyed, so angry, I just don't even know if I want to do it anymore..clearly it's not about making me happy, or making it special for me, and I know it's going to be a big rushed through thing...I don't know..so stressed about it... :(

[crstl11]

My baby shower that I had by my sil (which I love to death) we get alone great was not to great because of my mil we don't get alone at all she is a witch. I have people in my family who are jealous of each other I have never understood I'm always proud of family for success I thought that is what family was all about.

[KTowne]

Well I'm glad you had a good turn out for 10!! If it gets stuck that way I won't feel so bad, haha! My sisters are both very jealous...of course they're jealous of each other too if anything good happens to them too, it's one of this situations where they can't just be happy for the ones they love..it's really annoying!

[mommyanddaddyd]

Wow our stories are very similar when it comes to the jealousy. After the shower, about a week later, I had a huge blow out with one of my sisters. swore she would have nothing to do with my child well she came and apologized a few days later and.things are better for now.

[mommyanddaddyd]

Hi girly I know your frustrations with the baby shower and my sisters PLANNING it. It was a nightmare and I took over lol I do have to say we moved it from 2 to 10 because it was suppose to be 115+ that day and figured the earlier the better and it turned out great. Come to think about it we never even told the guests the reason we moved it we also had to change the location to! I liked it earlier bc  it was done by two and we were cleaned up and out of there by four :)

[KTowne]

That's what they're planning, a brunch style baby shower, and we can still do brunch at 11am, that just sounds better to me than 10, jeez I don't even want to go to a baby shower at 10, not even mine, haha! We don't have many faithful church goers in our family, so that's not too big of an issue, but we do rent a venue in the church where we have our parties, so I have NO idea where it's going to be either!

[Spiket77]

Uggh...I'm sorry. I've been to so many showers in the past. What is important is that you are comfortable and happy. I find it rude they can't get it together enough to be nice and considerate. I don't think they are going to change on that one. I would just play nice and go through with it and then move on. I don't think you should cancel because that might cause more drama than you want right now. I would come at 10am...especially if you made it like a brunch style thing. The church crowd won't make it though.

[TxMamma]

Wow how frustrating! My best friend threw me a shower but I had to host it at my house 10 days before baby was born. You can imagine how fun it was to clean my house top to bottom while in my whale state. I'd much rather not have had one at all. But my sister is mentally challenged and called my friend and asked when we were doing a shower bc they'd done my first one together. People don't think they can say "no" to my sister. So I ended up not only feeling like a burden, but having to host my own shower.

[KTowne]

Thank you ladies, I'm just planning on asking to push it back til 11, if that's so much of a big deal to wait one more hour, then I'd rather not even have one, I have all my big stuff, and I would rather not get super stressed, or irritated over nothing! I texted my sister last night, nothing yet, so we'll see!

Desarae, that is so nice of you! :) Some people just have a hard time being happy for the ones they care about, and since one is TTC, and one is bitter because she can't have anymore, it's NOT a happy time for them..just so frustrating!! Because I know they'll want to be all over her when she's born.

[Des_a_rae]

I'm sorry hun!  This IS about you and your new baby.  That's the whole point, not when they can be there or how they feel about it.  I'm sorry, but I'd tell them to forget it, thanks anyways, but if it's that much of a burden just so THEY'RE happy, then FORGET IT. It's not about them at all!  I honestly don't even think they're happy about it, kinda acting like they feel obligated, even thought they did offer and maybe now they regret it.  I'm so sorry..IF you were close, I'd plan it for you :D.  I've done lots of showers and I LOVE making the expecting mother feel wonderful about herself and the joys of being happy and being a "new" mommy and getting some things she might need OR want.  Why can't they see that?   AND GEEZE, you're their sister.  UGH!!  

Sorry for going off lol..just makes me mad when people act like that and especially family :(.  I'm sorry..but I would say "no thanks"  tell them why and be done with it.  I'm SURE someone will throw you one!!  Sending you big hugs!!

[rosey422]

I would be upset as well that why I opted not to have a shower didn't want to deal with the headache so instead I'm having a meet and greet after she's born

[rosey422]

I would be upset as well that why I opted not to have a shower didn't want to deal with the headache so instead I'm having a meet and greet after she's born

[Turnersmommy]

My in laws did mine at 10:30 on a Saturday! It was so frustrating bc they waiting until the other day to do it, and I'm due any day now so I was miserable and sick and nobody wanted to come that early. His whole family complained to me about it and I was just like I had NOTHING to do with it! Lol my mom lived about an hour and a half away and missed it bc she thought it was in the afternoon. She called so upset and was yellin "who the hell has a shower at 10 am??!!" haha my poor sister drove when she found out and just missed half of it so she could atleast be there. I appreciate them having one for me at all... It was just really awkward and they said the same thing.. It wouldnt ruin the day and ppl could have a full day left to do stuff. I agree with you, just not a right time to do a shower. TRUST ME! Lol I know from experience! I'm so sorry they are being rude to you tho. No one deserves that.

[crstl11]

I would be ticked I would call and tell her forget it and take over and call people and tell them what time u want to do it...be truthful the guest will probably be relieved if it is later..I would even tell her if it is such a burden she don't even need to come

[Apeydef]

yes they are being ruse and if they offered then they need to make it about you! sorry they have made you so mad, I would be mad too.

[KTowne]

We are having a second shower because it's a girl, and we have a boy. My sister offered the baby shower since she didn't get to plan my son's, so I never mentioned to anyone that I wanted one. And in my family, even extended family, almost every baby you get a baby shower, so that's not it.. my sister that lives here had 2 baby showers too. Just so annoying! I honestly don't care if I have one or not, we have all the big stuff, it was pretty much just for little extra's, so I can get that stuff myself..

[Apeydef]

not saying they are right, but some people think its rude to have a shower with your second child since they buy you stuff for the first. Maybe that is their problem. I do think they are being mean though. I would just put my foot down and say sorry it's not at 10! People have church and stuff on Sunday morning they don't want to go to something at 10 am.

[KTowne]

I don't want to ask anyone to do it, I just feel weird about that. If I tell them nevermind I'm just going to do it myself, I will get some serious backlash. I already have almost everything I need, so the baby shower was just for little extra's. I'm going to call and talk to my other sister tomorrow, I just don't want to ask that it be moved and have them be miserable while we're there because it's not the time they chose.

[lovelyglover]

That sounds really stressful maybe yu could ask someone else to do it or throw it yourself :)

[KTowne]

My husband was so annoyed that she said "so it doesn't ruin the day" that he told me to not do it, and that he'd do it. I have very few close friends, lots of family that would do it, but I don't want to ask anyone, I would just do it myself, but they'd still want it at 10am so it doesn't ruin their day...just seems to be more about them than me.

[KTowne]

I asked that it be moved, even to 11, I understand it's a sunday and she will want to be back home, and the sister that lived here said no, nope, that's when we're doing it. SO..that's that.

And the reason i said boo hoo about her wanting kids with this new man is because she had her tubes tied after having 2 children with a drunk that treated her like crap when she was 24, I have her kids 90% of the time because she never has a babysitter, they are TERRIBLE, and she doesn't have the money to raise the two she's got as it is, she only wants another child with him because he wants one, and they constantly argue anyway, maybe a commitment of marriage before she chooses to have more children?...Don't know..but it's a very selfish reason to try to make someone feel TERRIBLE their entire pregnancy, because they're not happy for their sibling.

[jayhatmom]

ktowne im sorry your family is finding it difficult to share in your happiness-im having some of that trouble on my end...you are not alone. do you have a close friend that might be happier to share in your joy? a friend I made in may after I moved is throwing mine since our family just wasnt interested. best of luck & dont let them get you down

[KTowne]

Well, one of my sisters is so jealous that I'm having another child and she's not (she got her tubes tied, then found a new BF so she wants kids with him, boo hoo) and the other wants to get back to her home 4 hours away asap. I do NOT want my baby shower at 10am, the earliest, maybe 11? I don't know..SO annoyed by it..and I know they will just have a fit if I want to change the time.. it just seems like they aren't interested in making it anything special for me, so I don't know if I want to even have one... :/

[tasha_labruyere]

That would make me mad! Who wants to get up early to go to a baby shower. Noone. Thats why theyre usually in the afternoon.! And ruin the rest of the day? Thats bullcrap it shuld completly make the resta ur day so what does it matter to them