Trust Issues.

[kj2013]

I have some serious trust issues.. I've been done incredibly wrong multiple times, and I guess it's just been pretty hard to get over.. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 6 months, he's not only my boyfriend, but he's my bestfriend too, & I love him unconditionally, but I feel it isn't fair to him sometimes because I tend to worry over stupid stuff, I guess just because I'm paranoid about getting hurt again.. How do I get over this?

[Londres70]

You sound confused.  

Again, definitely isn't his problem but yours.  

You need to resolve this issue of trust r/t unsolved feelings from your other relationships before it destroys your CURRENT relationship.  I would recommend discussing this with a therapist.  

[kj2013]

i think what i meant to say came out wrong .. it's not that i don't trust him .. i do trust him, so much.. it really doesn't have anything to do with trusting him, because i don't have a problem with that .. i guess it's just taken me a long time to feel secure again after the things that have happened to me, and it caused me to worry over stupid things.. but i've actually gotten over it now.

[Londres70]

Hmmm, think it wouldn't be a bad idea to try going to therapy to get a professional's opinion about your "serious trust isseues."  

May I ask what occured in your previous relationship(s)?  

[brice1967]

Interesting question... "how do I get over this?".  I'd bet any number of people on this board or doctors, therapists, counselors etc all have different opinions.  The thing is, this concerns you... not them.  It is often easier to tell someone how to get over things than it is to actually get over them, yourself.

Considering the post above, and the information being rather vague... has your boyfriend ever been or has ever done you wrong? If not, you need to seperate him for the others. He didn't do anything wrong, so he can not be catagorized in the same group.  At this point, he's done nothing wrong.  If you cannot get him seperatede, that is probably a trust issue that is best handled by a professional.

Communication is key.  If you cannot communicate and tell this guy your feelings, part of the problem is yours.  If you've got no reason to not trust this guy, you need to tell him your concerns and let him close the doors on all of the doubt.