Love failed

[crave]

Im in a relationship for past 13 months, a very emotional and physical bonding.  We are of same religion , but not the same caste. Our cultures are different because we are from two different states. He is not ready to commit because his parents wouldnt agree to this. im now being ignored because he doesnt want to hurt his parents feelings.

My love is failing here, i cant believe Im not given a chance or choice. He has made his mind for his parents, though breakup is tough for both of us. he is also having certain emotional stress problems, which makes it so difficult to discuss these matters. He loves me , but he can give up our love for his parents. Im not able to go through this because this relation means a lot to me.

how do i behave in this situation? Do we talk in front of a councellor? He is avoiding me recently to give me no more hopes. what i have to do i get him back? Is this worth trying again? Im quite depressed and unable to cope up with the situation. Kindly help.

[mami1323]

Getting over someone takes time.  Although you think you won't ever get over it you do.  You can not win someone back.  They have to want to come back.  From the looks of it he made the decision and hasn't even tried to get back into the relationship.  I'm sure it wasn't an easy decision for him to walk away but he was able to.  That shows a lot.  Try your hardest to move on, go out, do things for yourself.  If it's meant to be it will be.  You can't force someone to love you.

[crave]

thank you all for replying. is there anyway i can get him back? Change his mind on this? Maybe he is tensed and taking a quick decision whcih maybe regretted later. I dont want to lose him for any cost. This means a lot to me. I know im being stupid, but i cant believe that this is real, i trusted this relation so deep. M not able to get over it.
--Crave

[honesty77]

"Love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person. Love is an act of faith, and whoever is of little faith is also of little love."

[mami1323]

crave, I'm sorry to say but the above posters are correct.  There is nothing here to fight for, it's obvious that he has made his decision and as hard as it is you have to just leave it at that.  My friend in college went through the same thing.  She was with a man for 2 years and they knew they could not be together because he was muslim and she was christian and their families would not accept their relationship.  They were from Lebanon and their parents were both very old school.  In the end it hurt them both to walk away from eachother but it was what they decided to do.  So even though you want him, it's clear that he does not want you in the same way.  He is actually doing you a favor by cutting off all contact because if he did talk to you it would give you false hope because the situation will not change.  I know it hurts but in time it will hurt less and less.  You need a man who will choose you over any one else, if he doesn't then he isn't worthy of your love.

[heatherlynn22]

well if he wants to keep his family happy you have to respect his wishes. if he wanted to make it work he wouldn't ignore you. just let him go. i know it's hard but perhaps with counseling (for yourself not as a couple) you can get over it. if he wants to be with you....he'll come to you.