I'm in the process of doing all of these activities
Thanks for all of your help you all
Heehee I noticed that to...lol.
Mami----- lol!!! We are still doing it!!!!
Here is my advice to you boogiefly and I really mean this----- you need to pursue some things in your life besides your relationship. It sounds like you spend a tremendous time plotting and planning and worrying and carrying on about your relationship--- both past and present. That gets very old. How is your career? How are the relationships with your friends going? Do you work out? Do you have any hobbies that you are passionate about? By becoming happier with yourself, you will be a better partner whether it is with your current boyfriend or someone else.
When cheating has occured, it is sometimes impossible for someone to completely forget. Quit reminding him. He is telling you this---- he is trying to get over it----- and you won't let it die. No, he may not be over it yet---- but he may be trying to be.
Judy's advice is good, follow that. And please try to bolster your own things about you that are seperate from him. Good luck
I think you focus too much on your boyfriend. He probably feels that to and is annoyed. Go find a hobby or spend time with friends. Gain some independence and confidence and perhaps then he will be chasing after you and not the other way around.
I understand what you are saying, its just hard for me to back off when we live together and I see him upset. Most of the time he is ok, just this week he is being cold and distant. Usually when he comes home from work he comes to bed and gives me a hug, and lately he won't even touch me. All he says is that I'm mean to him and i smother him. So I will try to do what you said.
Guys aren't as warm and fuzzy as women are. They don't care to hear that they are beautiful and wonderful...no offense ok, it's just reality from experience. If he told you he has forgiven you, take it and run. He has forgiven you, so you don't have to go overboard to please and forgive. Just be yourself, back off a little, give him his space and who knows, he just might ask you out for dinner :) Good luck.
Well that's the thing, this time I didn't even bring it up. I called him just to see how he was doing and I told him he is beautiful and wonderful and he just said he had to go. He said he doesn't believe that I feel that way because I cheated on him and treat him like crap. So what do I do. He said he forgave me, but this doesn't feel like foregiveness.
7 years of guilt? It is time to move on from the past drama. He has told him that your guilt is resulting in you being overbearing and if this continues, he will leave you. I applaud you for attempting to communicate constructively with him, but apparently something is not working out here.
LET THE CHEATING SUBJECT GO! This happened 7 years ago, let it go. If you continue to bring up the past and live in the past, you will be stuck and can't mover forward. Time to forgive yourself as he has forgiving you and move on or it will be a matter of time that he will leave you, not because of the cheating, but because of the overbearing behavior. Start by just being yourself and not have to prove to him anything anymore and stop catering to him hand and foot, because it is turning him off. Just be you and forgive yourself, accept yourself and everything will fall into place.
Just to add to what mami's good advice--- um a threesome won't make him love you better, it will convince him it is fun to have sex with other people.
I think this ship has sailed with this relationship, to be honest. Starting fresh with someone new is your greatest chance at happiness.
You can't pay for what you did forever. He's got to work on moving past it. If he can't then there is no point in staying to make it work. He will never be happy and he will never let you be happy. Just move on.