Mother/Son Relationship breakdown

[karshemo]

My Gay Son has stopped all contact with me stating that our relationship was "too toxic"  I have no idea why this has happened, I have always been a huge supporter of Gay rights and issues and have shown nothing but unconditional love and support for him.  Our relationship changed when he married his Sweetheart five years ago.  I am a widow and desperately want to understand why this has happened and pray that this situation can be reversed very soon.

[karshemo]

Thank you, God is on my side so I have no worries that all will be well in God's time, however the human side of me is hurt.

[RockRose]

In reading through more of this,  I feel very much the same as when I first posted.

He's blaming you for his unhappiness.  And who knows what's causing his unhappiness - it may be chemical.  *shrugs in confusion*

The men who I know who have done this say "I never felt like I fit in".  And then they lash out at their parents.

Karshemo,  enjoy your other blessings and pray for your son's happiness,  if you are the praying kind.  

[Londres70]

Hon, I stated "normally," not normal people.  Normally meaning in general people don't just cut someone off without a reason and now you've stated the reason.  

Sounds like there has been underlying issues for years and you would benefit from therapy.  As far as this son..........maybe over time he will be able to reconnect with you and only time will tell.  I think a professional counselor is in order here.  

[UnsureMS]

I am sorry you are going through this. I feel your pain. The past is probably what is causing all this. Still what was or wasn't done cant be changed, and the best you can do is seek his forgiveness for whatever wrongs he feels you did to him. Don't beat yourself up over anything though, stay strong. Your strength is what is going to help you through this. Plus it is a great thing to stay strong in your faith and in prayer. For you know you loved him as only a mother could and only want him truly happy.

You may want to give him some space but at the same time to resolve the issues you will have to find a way to communicate with him. If you were somewhat close to his sweetheart or spouse then try talking to them to get a better understanding of what is going on. If that is not a possible path and he won't talk to you, then write him. You said yourself he was a senistive child and more then likely he still has a good heart. So if you open up to him then maybe you both can begin to mend the pain and hurt that has caused your relationship to come to this.

Still please don't stop doing for you and being a strong woman. Children are allowed to make mistakes to and will have to face their choices head on. The relationship may never have been perfect but you never can gain the same love as a mothers love from anyone else. Therefore I trust that he will come to realize he does need you. Just never stop praying or lose faith in what you thought you had with your son. I will be praying for you too. And if I can give you anymore moral or support of any kind I will try. May god be with you and your family...

[specialmom]

You could send him things in the mail and write, no pressure to respond.  Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you.  ????  

[karshemo]

I have done that specialmom but as yet no response.  We haven't spoken since January this year but I am ever hopeful that this will change.